November 1, 2024
When you admit the fact that these are coping mechanisms you developed as a child, because you had no other options – you don't look so bad anymore. And I think that's important to understand because shame and guilt and blame, embarrassment and the fault and the failure – that's what is holding you back from getting better. All unproductive emotions behind this condition need to be pushed aside. Personality traits are formed over course of time.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d33ymbxzKeY
Nov 1
🖥️ AI images
Nov 1
Problem is – we can't explain the pain to you. We keep trying to explain the pain. Your partner doesn't understand and never will. Yelling and screaming and breaking that plate it's not going to help them get it, it's not going to help them to understand. In back of my head I thought that somebody could help me. I thought that they could help me. They can't, they don't know how.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d33ymbxzKeY
Nov 1
🇮🇪 AI image - Wexford, Ireland
Nov 1
🖥️ AI images - 1950s sci-fi
Nov 1
📻 Classic FM
Nov 1
Nov 1
🇩🇿 Petite Casbah
Nov 1
You ever heard of a transorbital lobotomy? They zap the patient with electroshock, then go through the eye with an ice pick, pull out some nerve fibers. Makes the patients much more obedient. Tractable. Do you know how pain enters the body, Marshal? Do you?
- Depends on where you're hurt?
- No, it has nothing to do with the flesh.
🎞️ Shutter Island (2010)
Nov 1
The brain controls pain. The brain controls fear, empathy, sleep, hunger, anger. Everything. What if you could control it?
- -You mean the brain?
-Recreate a man so he doesn't feel pain or love or sympathy. A man who can't be interrogated, because he has no memories to confess. They turned soldiers into traitors. That's what they're doing here. They're creating ghosts to go out in the world and do things sane men... Sane men never would.
🎞️ Shutter Island (2010)
Nov 1
Let me ask you. Any past traumas in your life?
- But why would that matter?
- Because they're gonna point to some event in your past and say it's the reason you lost your sanity. So that when they commit you here, your friends and colleagues will say, "Of course he cracked. "Who wouldn't after what he'd been through?" They can say that about anyone, anyone at all. The point is they're gonna say it about you.
🎞️ Shutter Island (2010)
Nov 1
🎬 Young Anthony Quinn (32) in Sinbad the Sailor (1947)
Nov 2
🖥️ AI image: surreal monument in the fog
Nov 2
🖥️ AI images: sports
Nov 2
🏉 Rugby. Serie A Elite maschile - 4a giorn, 2024-11-02, 14-48-29, Rai Sport HD
Nov 2
🏉 Rugby. Serie A Elite maschile - 4a giorn, 2024-11-02, 14-48-29, Rai Sport HD
Nov 2
🏉 Rugby. Serie A Elite maschile - 4a giorn, 2024-11-02, 14-48-29, Rai Sport HD
Nov 2
🚔 FLIC STORY
Nov 2
🚔 FLIC STORY
Nov 2
You take the beauty that is already inside of them and you bring it out. You illuminate it. That true beauty.
🎞️ THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL
Nov 2
🏉 ran Rugby live - Autumn Nations Series: 🏴 - 🇳🇿
Nov 2
🏉 ran Rugby live - Autumn Nations Series: 🏴 - 🇫🇯
Nov 2
🖥️ AI images: Crusaders
Nov 3
🕵️♂️ Lupin- il pericolo e' il mio mestiere
Nov 3
🤼 MMA - UFC Classiques
Nov 3
🖥️ AI image Generator - Lost Mayan city
Nov 3
🏉 Rugby Club
Nov 3
And you have to be able to roll with it. And I mean not to react to it. Because the reacting is the problem. It's not hearing the data, it's the reaction. You could hear data and you could not react. You could do that. Nobody's ever probably explained how. But you could do that. And it comes in form of just listening to things as data. Strip the emotion, you have excellent filtering capabilities. Someone says you look nice and you think why not every morning?
🟥 Sensitive.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
You have the ability to change that filter, to only listen and interpret. You don't know what to say, you don't know what to do, you simply say thank you for the information, I'll think about that. That's it, that's all you say. Take time and think about it. Think from their perspective – who said it. Was their attention to hurt your feelings? It may not come hurting your feelings from a bad place, it might come from place where they were hurt.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
Nov 3
You have to be able to hear that information and to use it as data to curate a better world. You can't start arguing with that information “The reason I was late..” - nobody cares about that. They have their own perspective. Different triggers – some get only disrespected at workplace. Usually you have specific things you want in return. You let them know that as you get very upset. That's how you fall in manipulation trap. “I always do for you”.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
We always look at it – we put in a way more than the other person. You put a way more inappropriately. That's the problem. And your display of empathy is incorrect before remission. You need to learn what real empathy is. It makes somebody feel uncomfortable while building resentment on your side. Manipulative control empathetic mechanism that was using the empathy the wrong way.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
His offering being a friend wasn't enough because that doesn't validate me as a person. I had to manipulate the validation. Do things for him so he pats me on the back, thank you so much you are such a good person. I was doing it for that. I wasn't doing it to be a good person. I was doing it so he told me that I am a good person. That built resentment, we don't understand love what it means. I wouldn't give so much. Not force to follow my rules.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
🖥️ AI image generator: angry basketball player
Nov 3
Manipulating people, it infiltrates all aspects of our lives. Most of the time we don't even know that we're doing it. We just feel uncomfortable and our natural coping mechanisms kick in and create the scenario where we have a world around us that is comfortable. We don't want to feel vulnerable, we don't want to feel weak, feel attacked, feel scared- so to get around that we surround ourselves with people, jobs, ideas to keep us safe, it is not on purpose.
🟥 Sensitive S
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS3oAHw6HSI
Nov 3
🇮🇹 Linea Verde - Calabria
Nov 3
🗞️ Mann-O-Meter
Nov 3
⚽ Téléfoot
Nov 3
I started sewing when I was quite young, thanks to my grandma who was always making costumes for us and mending our clothes.
I’d come up with what my grandma called “out there” ideas, like making a bag out of leaves or a full-on superhero costume with muscle padding. Instead of telling me it was too ambitious, she’d help me figure out how to make it happen.
👔 Luke Matthew
Nov 3
Carl Jung believed that personal growth often lies beyond our comfort zones. Exploration of unknown. Right community could provide emotional nourishment and support. Finding people who get them could reduce feelings of isolation and foster a sense of belonging.
🟥 Jung’s Shocking Revelation
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO4R2Y94kvE
Nov 3
🖥️ AI image sports
Nov 3
🖥️ AI image Soccer team in sauna
Nov 3
🖥️ AI image Football team in underwear
Nov 3
🧁 Mohnschnecken
Nov 3
People like you don't change.
- People like me?
- Manipulators, schemers, liars. That's who you are.
🎞️ THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL
Nov 4
The way I sorted it out in my head is an association between risk, danger, humiliation, judgment and being seen. Most often this comes from childhood. An environment where you would be told by parents either get out of my sight (connection in child brain about being seen and negative emotion), or of having been heavily judged, persecuted and humiliated when the child is seen. Then a simple neural association is being made: being seen+stress
🟥 Social Anxiety And Narc Abuse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJtWduhEFew
Nov 4
People who already have pre-existing social anxiety are more prone to getting into narcissistically abusive relationships. Being in narcissistically abusive relationships can increase social anxiety.If a person is already being nervous and anxious around being seen then it makes sense they would be averse to put themselves in situations where they are seen. One of major mechanism of narcissistic abuse is narc scanning the target for their vulnerabilities
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJtWduhEFew
Nov 4
"every room has a door. Use it"
Nov 4
Limerence – narc is idealizing the target, the target is idealizing the narc. This is part of shared fantasy. It's not authentic recognition of another human being as a human being. It's person+story you creating, story they are feeding you, to create a fantasy. You're not accepting the person for reality of who they are. You're propping up the fantasy of who they want to be of who you need them to be.
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJtWduhEFew
Nov 4
There are so many ways you can go with that question. Because I don't know you, I don't know your experience. People will jump “I know what she means” and you do that – you are projecting yourself onto the questioner. I don't want to do that because if I do that I'm going to take you where I need to go, not where you need to go. It's written in open-ended way. “How do I know what is normal interaction when everybody in my life is narc”
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJtWduhEFew
Nov 4
When you are growing up you are internalizing people's view of the world, adults view so you can survive in it. The most negative introjects that you receive are called the inner critic, but they're just introjects. Tape recorder that plays blindly what significant authoritative figures in your life told you to be true about who you are and about what life is about. The inner critic would be the most negative of those recordings.
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJtWduhEFew
Nov 4
🖥️ AI image ziggurat in the fog
Nov 4
Belittling words. Nothing better than being called stupid by someone who says they love you. Invalidates your feelings and needs. “You're really going to make big deal about that” “I was just kidding” Blames their toxic behavior on you. Before you met them life was easier. Needs to be victim at all time. Not taking accountability for anything. Interprets any feedback as attack. Gaslighting I never said that, you're crazy. Guilt tripping. Over-reactive
🟥 Narcissist Bingo 😂
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/u998yIEUfNw
Nov 4
🏉 Rugby Club
Nov 4
Nov 4
🍿 WB Animation
Nov 4
🎞️ Happy Halloween Scooby-Doo!
Nov 4
🎨 Aaron Rodgers sketch
Nov 4
🖥️ AI image wrestling
Nov 4
🇩🇪 Main German TV stations following American elections tomorrow
Nov 4
🥚 🥚 Fresh Bollocks
Nov 4
🎅 Weihnachtsmann & Co. KG
Nov 5
🖥️ AI image Sun God
Nov 5
🖥️ AI image Skyscraper in the field
Nov 5
Narcissistic people are naturally controlling, all of them. Extroverted folks in relationships with vulnerable narcissistic people probably experience this the worse. Because vulnerable narcissistic people are so oriented toward social anxiety already. And often have contempt for joy and for other people, the joy people have from being with other people. They control the narrative, social world, all of it.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
Agreeableness may actually be a byproduct of the narcissistic relationship rather than a risk factor for getting into it. When you are in narcissistic relationship especially with a partner or friend or boss, you sometimes find yourself in the unwitting role of being a crisis management person. Your agreeableness is actually what can dissipate the harms of the entitled and abusive behavior that the narcissistic person may spew on the world.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
We are shaped by these narcissistic relationships. And a lot of the shaping relates to psychological safety. Engaging in the responses that will make us safe. And for many of us that means warm, flexible, cheery empathic compliant, give-them-second-chance agreeableness that allowed these relationships to sustain for years to our detriment. Our agreeableness may get a little pruned once we step away, once we start to understand narcissism.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
Big awakening for those been in narcissistic abuse: a) we recognize our agreeableness was a safety response but b) we recognize that there's also fear that comes up if I am the difficult one, there's a loss of love, loss of regard. But then agreeable people get bulldozed over quite regularly. So to get things done you had to be demanding and pushy which is out of repertoire. When people get off their behavioral repertoire they get very tired.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
When we make noise the narcissistic person knows that a great way to control an agreeable person is to tell them that they're being difficult. So you stop making demands. And then the narcissistic person doesn't have to do what you're asking them to do. Idea of True North. I had to live with being difficult. But it definitely depletes you.
🟥 DoctorRamani,
The impact of a narcissistic relationship on YOUR personality
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
They'd often tell her how she was socially awkward. She's actually a really gregarious, warm, funny, very appropriate fun person. She wasn't odd. But she had been told that she said things wrong and she did things wrong, and that she looked foolish so many times by them by such loud primary voices in her life that she started to believe it. She would feel around people that they're going to need something. That other people meant you cannot relax.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
🎨 Omar Marmoush sketch
Nov 5
That you had to be acutely aware of their needs, that your own needs could not be expressed, or met or were made secondary, that she would say wrong thing, so she said to hell with it. It's easier to be at home with TV shows she liked, books to read. It left her confused. Am I introvert? Do I prefer being alone? She remembered years ago when she was on her own that she loved being with people. Laughed, friends, classes. After narcissistic stuff who she was?
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moBe4RUSg7A
Nov 5
🖥️ IA image Oregon coast
Nov 5
November 5, 2024 - America is in an Act of Exorcism tonight. 🇺🇸
Nov 5
🖥️ IA image running
Nov 6
🖥️ AI image alien city in fog
Nov 6
You can't validate yourself. And all this is due to the first neural network that form surrounding how you feel about you, are crafted on what other people think about you. You are more worried in most cases about what the outside world thinks of you than you are what you think about you. So it's not so much about you don't know who you are as much as you've let the world tell you who you are. Step back and find your actual personality values.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywTEnGytOz8
Nov 6
And you have to understand the difference between a label and an actual personality trait. You are not a mother. You are somebody who is nurturing. You are not hard worker, you are a provider. You are not a firefighter, you're a hero. Someone who puts other people's needs ahead of themselves. That's how you figure out who you are. Until you are sick of how your life is, you will not change.
🟥 Sensitive Stability
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywTEnGytOz8
Nov 6
Nov 6
- I like going there and supporting Deacon.
- But she had ulterior motives.
- She was just thinking about herself and her feelings. Sad. I really believed in our relationship, in our friendship. I trusted Taylor.
🎞️ THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL
Nov 6
🎭 La flûte enchantée
Nov 6
🖥️ Ancient world walking
☔
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