Feb 1 2023
Sometimes anxiety isn't disorder, it's just a message that something needs to change. Woman who had been diagnosed with a half -dozen disorders over 25 years... when she finally left her abusive husband, most symptoms went away. Problem was not a mental disorder, it was situation
Peter Levine theorizes that animals don't experience a sense of trauma, because they have a biological mechanism for shaking it off.YT How the BODY heals from Trauma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AYB9ggz2Qw
Traumatic symptoms are not caused by the "triggering" event itself. They stem from the frozen residue of energy that had not been resolved or discharged; this residue remains trapped in the nervous system where it can wreck havoc on our bodies and spirits.
Peter Levine
Listen to your body. It's smarter than you are.
What is Re-traumatization?
A situation, attitude, interaction, or environment that replicates the events or dynamics of the original trauma and triggers the overwhelming feelings and reactions associated with them
Actively resist re-traumatization
https://opentextbc.ca/peersupport/chapter/samhsas-definition-of-trauma-informed-care/
https://odysee.com
And if you don’t notice the lack of problems (“things gone right”), you certainly won’t praise people.
"Crucial Confrontations: Tools for talking about broken promises, violated expectations, and bad behavior"
Narcissist regards his dysfunctional behaviours – social, sexual, emotional, mental – as conclusive and irrefutable proof of his superiority, brilliance, distinction, prowess, might, or success. Rudeness to others is reinterpreted as efficiency.
"NPD Quotes", Sam Vaknin
Narcissists should be held accountable for most of what they do because they can tell wrong from right AND they can refrain from taking the actions they do take. He simply doesn't care to do so. Others are not important enough to him.
"NPD Quotes", Sam Vaknin
The environment send you stimuli (provide information). A specific Self state is selected. Self-state activates construct. Construct interfaces with reality, gathers information, filters it, re-frames it in order to conform to self state.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Construct also changes your memory. It kind if represses some memories, emphasizes other memories, creates selective memory. It alters perception of reality, it alters your memories, then induces in you behaviours to Self state uphold.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
This is done via interjects. Interjects are our internal voices in your head that send out a stream of automatic thoughts. The constructs activate/trigger specific interjects. Then automatic thoughts shape your behaviour, then you create specific outcomes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Interjects example for people pleasing: if you love/like people, if you want to please people if you feel you are someone's mother or daddy figure, you are going to withhold your happiness. You'll suppress your joy not to burden on nearest.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
“I have to earn my happiness”. I don't deserve happiness, I have to work hard for it. I have to justify it. That happiness is my due. Identifying happiness with tasks, with assignments, labor. Busier they are, happier they feel.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Automatic Belief: I have to make sure that people tolerate me because they give them something in return. And I do this because I am bad object: I'm unworthy, unlovable, crazy, inadequate, hopeless. So people must be compensated in return.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Automatic thoughts: I must compromise. I need to compromise on my boundaries. So I need to give up on rights, demands, on expectations. Need to minimize myself to point of vanishing. To be a function. Being human is burden on other people.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
These automatic thoughts are at the core of people pleasing, parentified children. With this mindset this person would allow anything done, no boundaries. Because in her mind she has no right to say no, being bad object.
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Constructs are ways of organizing the world. Constructs imbue the world with sense and meaning, interpreting the world, explaining what is happening. Constructs falsify and re-frame memory,and suppress a lot of information that conflicts Self
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
Constructs would affect the behaviour of people pleasers to conform to the self-state. They do this by activating interjects and flooding the person with automatic thoughts. These affect behaviour, which affect reality &conforms to self state
YT Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Dp4KMyreA
The psychopath (the Antisocial Personality Disorder) feels no remorse. The narcissist feels blame and guilt but then he instantly shifts them to others (MAINLY and OFTEN to his victim)."
"NPD Quotes" Sam Vaknin
Feb 1
What are you?
- I'm a construct. From your mind.
Moonfall (2022)
Feb 2
During the Apollo 12 mission, the Ascent Stage of its Lunar Module was deliberately crashed onto the moon's surface, which resulted in shallow 'moonquakes' which could be detected by lunar seismographs for nearly an hour.
IMDb trivia, Moonfall (2022)
Feb 2
All of humanity has the potentiality to victimize humans and other living creatures. While many restrain or sublimate this tendency, some act upon these impulses.
Michael Nuccitelli, Psy.D. (2006)
Dark Psychology
Feb 2
- I'm scared!
- Feelings are scary. And sometimes they're painful. And if you can't feel the pain... then you won't feel anything else either. You're here and you're alive. Don't tell me you don't feel that - it is good, believe me.
Ordinary People (1980)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DItzvWPhlqs
Feb 2
"For sale; broom slightly used"
BH&G Halloween Outdoors 2022
Feb 2
"Witch Flying School"
BH&G Halloween Outdoors 2022
Feb 2
Santa stomp sketch,
scene from "A Christmas Story" (1983)
Feb 2
- I'm trying to control myself.
- Why didn't you throw it?
- I'd still be angry.
- How do you know? Maybe you'd feel wonderful. Why do you control every thought that comes into your head? Do something you feel like doing, not what you're supposed to do.
The Odd Couple (1968)
In our society we are raised to solve problem by logic, fix it, do something to make this issue go away. But a lot of time way through is space, to be witness, not to fix anything. This is more feminine approach.
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=loveIMWxlRw&t=734s
Feb 3
Grounding – getting out of your head. As sensitive person what we experience in our body is raw energy and information. It's what we do with that information. For many of us it becomes thoughts develop into stories.
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=1072&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
And it's usually the stories that run wild that create further suffering. Instead of generating thoughts and making an imaginary drama you can shift that energy through your body. HSP find it very difficult to be in body.
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=1100&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
Because there is so much sensation and information in the body, there's a dissociation that occurs, and they end up here in mental field over-analyzing or distracting. Instead turn it into practice going for a walk. Hand it over to Earth.
YT Navigating...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=1129&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
If you have done your part to be of service from a sincere place and another person isn't receptive, what is best to do with that energy is to diffuse it and let it go. Digestive issues are stewing information and energy.
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=1175&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
It is important to recognize other people suffering isn't necessarily a bad thing. What is your relationship with pain, hardship, learning through difficulty. Attached to light love when someone's grumpy we'll be this must go away. That's story, perception
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=1240&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
"This isn't how it should be" that is indicator there is resistance to learning and growth and progress through friction. "I have to make it go away". Hardship, grief, anger are good things. Truly respect suffering, less I am concerned someone suffering.
https://youtu.be/loveIMWxlRw?t=1280
If I'm not trusting the process that suffering is going to lead to something good then of course I'm going to get all grippy about it. Friction – I get to be witness here and trust that they will grow stronger through this process.
YT Navigating...
https://youtu.be/loveIMWxlRw?t=1328
Feb 3
Identified as Helper, always here, I'm kind... These can become prison is you feel you can't not be there. What it would look like if you can't be kind? Ways of presenting can become prison for us, appearing have it together
YT Navigating the world as HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=3053&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
Do I shut down and think I'm inherently unworthy because I have a physical ailment, or do I receive the gift that is actually being presented where I am training of subtle senses. Story I choose to play is empowering nature
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=4256&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
It's being able to identify the information that is right there in front of you that you usually tune out. Being able to read things in people, knew how to read people. “My life depended on it who is on my team.”
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=4320&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
To be grounded in reality that people have motivations for doing things. And if we could understand them, what's driving certain behaviours, then we can experience less internal suffering that is result of confusion.
YT Navigating the world as a HSP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=4587&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
Not understanding why people do shitty things is open loop. A lot of people who experience trauma and abuse, it haunts them. “Why did they do that?” Well, they did it because they have an agenda that doesn't include your well-being.
YT Navigating the world
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=4605&v=loveIMWxlRw&feature=youtu.be
Feb 3
What is not meant for me there is nothing I can do to make me happy.
YT Blu
Navigating the world as a Highly Sensitive Person - with Hellè Weston | Blu Podcast EP 90
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=loveIMWxlRw
Feb 3
My heart is at ease knowing that what is meant for me will never miss me, and that what misses me was never meant for me.
Imam Al-Shafi'i
Feb 3
What Pythagoras also realized was that mathematics is independent of the observable, empirical world. Mathematics is “pure” and uncontaminated. The study of it enables you to escape from the grubby inconsistencies of the physical world.
"Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide"
Feb 3
For Heraclitus (c. 535-475 B.C.E.) the world was in a state of constant movement and change. Nothing had any permanence or reliability. "Panta rei" – everything changes. The dog we confidently claim to see in front of us was once a puppy and soon will be a corpse.
Introduc. Plato
Feb 3
Not only is the world just “process”, but everyone also sees it differently. All our beliefs about it are “observer-relative”. A weight is heavy for an ordinary man but light for a weightlifter.
Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide
There are no stable meanings to the subjective terms we use to describe the physical world.
Real knowledge can be pure and permanent only if it is obtained by the mind and not through the senses.
Although observation was useful, it was an inferior and misleading
Introducing Plato
Feb 3
Maybe between doctors and detectives is unusual, but in ballet is very usual.
- What is?
- Caprice of Mother Nature. Look at Pavel and Mischa, Boris and Dimitry and Illya and Sergei. Sergei... half and half.
The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes (1970)
Unfortunately, during a test run in Loch Ness, the Monster-prop sank and was never recovered. The original monster prop was located on the bottom of Loch Ness in April 2016 during a survey of the loch by an underwater robot.
IMDB trivia
The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes (1970)
Feb 3
With education, human beings could come to know their true selves, know what was good and act accordingly. "Unexamined life is not worth living".
The truth existed, but it was very difficult for human beings to achieve.
"Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide"
Feb 3
- How temporary is temporary amnesia?
- It's like veils, shrouding her memory.
- But we can't wait for these veils to lift. We must break them as quickly as possible.
The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes (1970)
Feb 3
It's ok not to feel ok
Feb 3
He is with you wherever you are.
Quran 57:4
Feb 4
Eventually you have to go out there and stink. You have to stink before you smell good. This is what it means to be mature. You have to be weak before you're strong. Life is about stepping out and learning while you are doing.
HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFMFVdBqtUI
Feb 4
Just even the worst sales pitch ever can make a difference because you're out there doing something.
There is something about not thinking too much. There's time to think, and then time to do. Failure is just as important part of winning.
HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFMFVdBqtUI
Feb 4
Big laboratories spend millions of dollars. And they work slowly and surely. And they get results but not the big steps. Not the breakthroughs. Those come from human mind, not from laboratory. Call them inspiration, intuition maybe blind luck.
The Outer Limits S1E1 (1963)
Feb 4
Santa Monica beach.
Feb 5
He was very opinionated, very strong. He said if you don't do this it will all go down. There's a fine line between advice and manipulation. God is not going to speak to someone else about your destiny and not tell you.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
All the reasons: "Stir up trouble", "you need his approval", "don't rock the boat" – these are tests we have to pass. I was afraid he may think, be offended, not like me. The Scripture says, fearing people is a dangerous trap.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
It uses word 'dangerous'. Because if you fear people, you can miss your destiny. If you let opinion of others, what will they think, what if they don't approve me, if you let that hold you back then you can miss who you were created to be.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
You don't need their approval. When they tell you, “You've changed, you're not who you used to be” tell them 'You're right I'm growing, my gifts are coming out in new ways'. It's not bad thing to change but some people can't handle it.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
If you depend on them, it will keep you from moving forward. If he would have been addicted to approval he would never rock the boat, he would have stayed there and let people's opinion control him. He'd never see the fullness of his destiny.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
Sometimes we're so concerned about what people think. What will they say, will they have a good opinion of me. We're spending all this time and energy trying to perform for people, win them over, make a good impression: getting approval from wrong place.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
They've never talked to you, never got to know who you are, never sat down and had lunch. Why are you worrying about what they think? Why are you trying to impress them? Giving time and energy responding to their comments?
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
Some people are determined to misunderstand you. Their comment is not really about you; it shows what's in them. They have issues they haven't dealt with – they're angry, they're upset, they don't like themselves.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
Don't be surprised they find fault with you. No offense, but they're not going where you're going. If you try to please everyone, win their approval you'll not only miss the new levels that belong to you, but also peace joy, victory of this day
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
The problem with living for approval is we can lose who we really are. We're so busy trying to be what everyone else wants us to be. That's when life gets confused. Search your own heart, when you know your conscience is clear.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
Don't get distracted trying to get everyone on board. It's a lot of pressure to live trying to please people, convince them to be for you so that you can pursue what is in your heart. Only you can hear that voice.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
You're being your best, and they're finding fault. They're looking down on you. Be like David. Have the attitude, I don't need your approval. I'm not making decisions based on your opinion of me. Live with integrity, do the right when it's hard
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j4Z-3LHC5c
Feb 5
Plato thought that the empirical world was a kind of illusion, a veil that hid the real truth from us. Different people experience this surface world in different ways, and have different views about its qualities.
Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide
Dave Robinson, Judy Groves
Feb 5
This means that people can only ever have “opinions” about this world, not knowledge as such. Any permanent or reliable knowledge of this sensory world is impossible. We all live surrounded by shadows, dreams, reflections and inferior copies of something better
Introducing Plato
Feb 5
All things are “contingent” – they only exist in a specific time & place. In order to make sense of this world we put everything into groups or classes, so that the world gets simpler. Occasionally, things crop up that don't "fit" into any of the classes we assume are "natural".
Feb 5
Better check her pulse. She's looked like that for years.
Urban Legend (1998)
Feb 6
Disinhibition is a lack of restraint manifested in disregard of social conventions, impulsivity, and poor risk assessment. Disinhibition affects motor, instinctual, emotional, cognitive, and perceptual aspects with signs and symptoms similar to the diagnostic criteria for mania.
Feb 6
We are not yet ready to accept the fact that the task is to change, not people, but rather the world in which they live.
B.F. SKINNER
Feb 6
Your brain is an organ. Your mind is your personality, values and "soul".
Brain can experience structural and chemical differences and not perform optimally, just like any organ.
Intrusive thoughts are related to brain, not mind. Compulsions are symptoms, not character traits.
Making your thoughts visible.
Galileo Galilei revolutionized science by making his idea visible with diagrams, maps and drawings.
Feb 6
I remember the first time I met Boy George the first thing he said to me is 'You're so straight, you must be gay'.
George Michael, 1988
https://youtube.com/watch?v=07Li2tMmUTY
Feb 7
What are you dealing here with? It is like cloud of nanobots, can show up as whatever they need to show up as in order to generate an emotion from you. They are emotion-generating entities. Like AI that induces emotions in others
YT How to Deal with a Narc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
If you want to fight back you must disrupt that symbiotic parasitic relationship between their actions, which are all false, which come from no authenticity whatsoever. The only reason is to induce reaction in you.
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
We have to disrupt their supply lines - that comes down to emotion. Break this cycle of action-reaction. They act, you react. They're Narcissus, you're Echo. So everything you're doing is reactionary.
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
Imagine all your actions were only being determined by the last thing your opponent did, that's an awful strategy. That means you're fighting the way they want you to fight. You do exactly what they want you to do and when.
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
The only way to break the cycle is with detachment. This cycle is stimulus – response. There must be space between what they've been doing and your response. It is skill, strength, it is uncomfortable. Pull back and don't respond
YT How to Deal with a Narc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
When dealing with an narcissist, psychopathy will trump their narcissism. Not psychopath, become psychopathic: goal-oriented. When you communicate with a narcissist, what is your objective? What are you trying to get done?
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
You never just communicate with narcissist – that's gone. You abandon all sincere communication when communicating with terminally insincere. Don't tell them what you're thinking, feeling, truth about your life, nothing.
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
When you speak, you speak with purpose or you do not speak. When you communicate, you communicate to fulfill your objective, not theirs, or you do not communicate. Narcissist hate silence. It's like predator not getting sonar pings back.
R. GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
Reduce the emotional reactions, reduce the communications. Like if you have to talk with them, use less words. Give up idea of being good, righteous, moral human being who create redemption. For narc there is only vertical power structure.
Deal with a Narc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
Remember this is a game, this is not real communication. That's not real person. You can't be in defense all the time, it's exhausting. Hit them with something they weren't expecting. Be deceptive and artifice.
YT How to Deal with a Narcissist | 5 Tips
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn6XA4h_xJ0
Feb 7
John Lithgow in drag,
Raising Cain (1992)
Feb 8
One philosophy is to conclude that no knowledge is possible the view of the sceptics.
But Pythagoras demonstrated that mathematical knowledge lay beyond this material world. Geometric figures and numbers are pure, permanent, indestructible, and never let you down.
Introd. Plato
Feb 8
There's no point in discussing something if you don't know what it is you are talking about. Heraclitus said that certain knowledge could never be of things in this world. I conclude that knowledge must be of things in another kind of world.
Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide
Feb 8
We probably have a lot more fear in our life than what we might recognize. There's a lot of little underlying fears that been around for so long we just become comfortable with them and don't recognize that they're there.
YT Joyce Meyer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WENW0EB0Cgk
Feb 8
Just because you don't like something doesn't mean that you don't need to do it.
We don't all like everything we do, that's why we need Holy spirit in us to show us what to do. Courage is doing it afraid.
YT Joyce Meyer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WENW0EB0Cgk
Feb 8
Antidote to fear is faith.
The more your faith builds, the more courageous you'll be. Doing anything worth doing, you're going to have to be willing to be wrong to find out if you're ever right. Foundation of knowing who you are.
YT Joyce Meyer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WENW0EB0Cgk
Feb 8
Narcissistic individuals have a fragile ego. They lack confidence in themselves. They act like bigger than life but its actually evidence of fragility, not stability. Imagine home with shaky foundation:a lot of management to increase stability
Kerry McAvoy
https://youtube.com/watch?v=hI9KZXQQZYo
Narcissists have to be right because that is the way to affirm their value and to gain confidence in themselves. This is done all unconsciously – it is reaction, defense mechanism they have. When they encounter someone talented, they'll feel shaky and insecure.
Kerry McAvoy, PhD
Don't take this personally. This is not about you, this is what's going on in narcissistic mind and in their sense of self. They'll make it personal because in order to deal with themselves, they'll deal with you.
YT Kerry McAvoy, PhD
https://youtube.com/watch?v=hI9KZXQQZYo
It's not about you, so there is nothing that you actually have to defend when it comes to these types of unfair accusations. Your past histories, your capabilities and your performance record will speak to what you bring to the team.
YT Kerry McAvoy, PhD
https://youtube.com/watch?v=hI9KZXQQZYo
I would encourage to directly talk to narcissist, unfortunately they'll likely not to own much, not likely to see problem, they're going to deflect problem and make the issue you. Keep record of showing effort to resolve conflict.
YT Kerry McAvoy, PhD
https://youtube.com/watch?v=hI9KZXQQZYo
Working with antagonistic people creates a lot of conflict. There may be no shortcuts around this. But it helps to be aware of dynamics so that you don't personalize it and get sick in the process.
YT How to Stop Being Undermined by a Narcissistic Coworker
https://youtube.com/watch?v=hI9KZXQQZYo
Feb 8
If you have to scrounge for love and security as a kid, young adult, through adulthood, there's a lot of parts of you that don't get developed. Don't get space and oxygen they need for you to find out what are your gifts, meaning beside survival.
YT Trauma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPn-noiriv0
It gets half as bad the minute you know what it is and you can name it. Like a poisonous drug has been injected, feeling come along this very dark outlook on world. Now I know it's abandonment melange, I can release it.
YT The Trauma Won't Stop Until...
https://youtube.com/watch?v=YPn-noiriv0
Abandonment melange is symptom of what happened to me as kid, that's not real response to what is happening to me. But I'm not drowning in poison, not kicked off from planet Earth. With magical thinking we ignore red flags.
YT Crappy Childhood Fairy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPn-noiriv0
Feb 8
It's hard to let go of the demons inside;
they were holding you when no one else would
Feb 8
The first question is why would anybody dissociate. You don't dissociate. Your brain does it automatically. Its origins are always in childhood. When the brain is developing. Brain tunes out as a way of defending.
YT Dr. Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSWkhPcyPs8
Later on it takes very little to trigger dissociation. This society does not honor vulnerability. In fact, it kind of shuns it. How many times you've been told don't be so sensitive. They as might say don't be green eyed. It's just your nature.
Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSWkhPcyPs8
So in this society sensitive people are hurt. In traditional societies the sensitive people were the shamans, they were the healers. In our society “Don't be so weak/sensitive”. You can't prevent it as child. You can heal it.
YT Dr. Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSWkhPcyPs8
Feb 8
Negativity bias is a cognitive bias that explains why negative events or feelings typically have a more significant impact on our psychological state than positive events or feelings, even when they are of equal proportion.
Feb 8
When we're ruminating on how helpless and powerless we are, we're stuck in the childlike victim position. We are completely powerless. When we focus on what we can control, that elevates us into adult position. Now take action.
YT Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaPov4Z5gh8
The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think and what you do is who you become.
Heraclitus
The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the light of day.
Heraclitus
A man's character is his guardian divinity.
Heraclitus
If you do not expect the unexpected you will not find it, for it is not to be reached by search of trail.
Heraclitus
Feb 8
Because it is so unbelievable, the truth often escapes being known.
Heraclitus
Feb 8
Prioritizing negative information can serve valuable purposes – it can even help us survive in dangerous situations (Langeslag & Van Strien, 2018).
Feb 8
Natural selection occurring in evolution has hardwired us to be biased towards negative information, whether it’s noticing it first, or in this case, expecting it constantly.
Feb 8
Our brain has a negativity bias, which makes it like Velcro for the bad and Teflon for the good. So we have to learn to take in the positive experiences, weaving them into the fabric of our brains.
Rick Hanson, Ph.D.
Feb 8
Joy leads to a desire to play or be creative. Joyful play can also help us build our social and emotional skills (Frederickson, 1998).
Feb 8
You need the negative focus to survive, but a positive one to thrive.
Dr Richard Boyatzis
Our mental health and wellbeing depends on the things that happen to us, how we make sense of those events and how we respond to them.
Dr. Peter Kinderman
Feb 8
The cells in your body react to everything that your mind says. Negativity brings down your immune system.
Feb 9
People deserve to have their experiences understood in a genuine bio-psycho-social approach. All to often, this is ignored in favor of what is a very reductionist, bio-medical model.
Dr. Peter Kinderman
Feb 9
I believe that mental health services should be based on the premise that the origins of distress are largely social.
Dr. Peter Kinderman
Feb 9
It's our framework of understanding the world, not our brains and not even the events that happen to us - not nature and not nurture - that determines our thoughts, emotions, behaviours and, therefore, our mental health.
Dr. Peter Kinderman
Feb 9
One of the secrets of life is that all that is really worth the doing is what we do for others.
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
She generally gave herself very good advice though she very seldom followed it.
'Alice in Wonderland'
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
I'm not strange, weird, off, nor crazy,
my reality is just different from yours.
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
If you don't know where you are going any road can take you there.
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
My view of life is, that it's next to impossible to convince anybody of anything.
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
If you drink much from a bottle marked 'poison' it is certain to disagree with you sooner or later.
Lewis Carroll
Feb 9
Why fit in when you were born to standout?
Dr Seuss
Feb 9
Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not.
Dr. Seuss
Feb 9
Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.
Dr. Seuss
Feb 9
Remember that life's a great balancing act!
Dr. Seuss
Feb 9
Just because I'm wrong doesn't mean you're right.
Feb 9
You don't hire for skills, you hire for attitude. You can always teach skills.
Simon Sinek
Feb 9
Self-love vs Narcissism
Feb 9
Sometimes called the “either-or” fallacy, a false dilemma is a logical fallacy that presents only two options or sides when there are many options or sides. Essentially, a false dilemma presents a “black and white” kind of thinking when there are actually many shades of gray.
Feb 10
In The Republic, Plato explains why democracy is a poor form of government.
Democratic governments have to take the short-term view, and so are directionless. They have to be crudely populist if the wish to be re-elected.
So they will always choose popular rather than wise.
Plato also thought it was very easy for democratic politicians to pretend to be wise and independently-minded whilst actually being blatantly populist. They are like fake animal trainers who pretend to give commands to a wild and untrained beast
Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide
John Stuart Mill (1806-73) argued,perhaps optimistically, that if individuals are allowed to argue and discuss politics, they automatically become better informed and wiser. The wisest and most practical will survive the debating process, and the pernicious ideas will wither away
Those who are able to see beyond the shadows and lies of their culture will never be understood, let alone believed by the masses.
Plato
Writing is the geometry of the soul.
Plato
We are twice armed if we fight with faith.
Plato
Those who tell stories rule society.
Plato
Nothing in the affairs of men is worthy of great anxiety.
Plato, "Timaeus"
Feb 10
Not Plato but it's true;
Reddit "HistoryMemes"
Feb 10
You guys are terrible communicators.
- I know. For years, we've tried to join you, to play with you. But you've always pushed us away. We exist because of you. We look up to you. Always have.
The LEGO Movie 2
I darkened my hair with marker, 'cause I wanted people to think I was cool and grown up. And then I tried to change you into someone tough, too. And I was wrong. I like you the way you were. Sweet, innocent, kind.
The LEGO Movie 2
It's easy to harden your heart. But to open it... That's the toughest thing you can do. I'm gonna grow up. But I won't stop caring about the people in my life. They may see the world differently, but that's not bad. It's inspiring.
The LEGO Movie 2
Everything's not awesome. But we can make it a little more awesome if we remember... We're not alone in this world. We're in it together.
The LEGO Movie 2 (2019)
Feb 11
Frozen water from bowl. It's been 6 days of freezing cold. Warmer weather perhaps starts from today.
Feb 11
Top 5 regrets of the dying
- courage to live a life true to myself, not expected of me
- not worked so hard
- express my feelings
- in touch with friends
- let myself be happier
Feb 11
Recognizing Emotional abuse:
- constant criticism
- repeatedly pointing out mistakes
- fault-finding
- yelling, lashing out
- sarcasm
- snide remarks
- picking fights
- angry attacks
- dismissing one's ideas & opinions
- making one feel worthless
How Do We Have Wrong Thoughts?
Our memory is like a wax tablet, full of impressions inscribed upon it by past experiences and ideas. Sometimes we apply these memories inappropriately to present experiences, and so make mistakes.
Introducing Plato: A Graphic Guide
Feb 11
Fool hates correction. How much you enjoy when someone corrects you?
Realization that my life gets better when I get better. Not when other things around me change. Get wisdom, kill your ego. There's no limit how good your life can be.
HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxqUAgTMwbs
Feb 11
It changes when you stop asking for life to be easier and when you start asking God to make you stronger. When you stop asking for struggle to go away and asking God to give you skills you need to get through those struggles.
HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxqUAgTMwbs
Feb 11
The child will, from this experience, attempt to construct and explanation of what's happened. And these explanations may excuse the parental negligence or abuse. The child may blame themselves for what has happened.
One Missed Call (2008)
Feb 12
In cases of severe and repeated childhood abuse the posttraumatic-stress model may be valid. Long-term effect may include amnesia, even hallucination.
The post-trauma child faces formidable developmental tasks and among these what we call "dissociative virtuosity"
One Missed Call
Feb 12
You try too hard to understand what's going on, my dear young man, and that's a serious mistake.
Orphée (1950)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKgY4p1a1Bg
Feb 12
What leads people to ruminate - not one mention was made in article of being in any kind of toxic relationship. Gaslighting, invalidating, confusion, manipulation, it's all real. You aren't exaggerating how bad or confusing it is.
YT DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xfygu8JdfiA
Feb 12
Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion.
Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
It's only because of their stupidity that they're able to be so sure of themselves.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
Start with what is right rather than what is acceptable.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume party, and I attended with my real face.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
Most men are not wicked. They are sleepwalkers, not evil evildoers.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
It is often safer to be in chains than to be free.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
In a fight between you and the world, back the world.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
God gives the nuts, but he does not crack them.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
It seems to be a fact that man, tortured by his demons, avenges himself blindly on his fellow-man.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
The mediation by the serpent was necessary. Evil can seduce man, but cannot become man.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
You too have weapons.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
Evil is whatever distracts.
Franz Kafka
Feb 12
How many Kafka's have lived and died without ever sharing their voice with the world; whose voice would have changed it forever.
How many people never know who they'll be after they're gone.
What Is Kafkaesque? - The 'Philosophy' of Franz Kafka
https://youtube.com/watch?v=LaffA9EyUgo
Much of what passes for normal in our society, is neither healthy nor natural.
And that to meet modern society's criteria for normality, is in many ways, to conform to requirements that are profoundly abnormal in regards to our nature given needs, which is to say, unhealthy.
Maté
Feb 12
(page 14)
Explain to me how come he (James Joyce) mentions 'talktapes' which means audio tapes in a book he wrote starting in 1922 and which he completed in 1939. Before there were tape recorders!
"The Divine Invasion"
Novel by Philip K. Dick
Feb 12
A man of genius makes no mistakes. His errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery.
James Joyce
Psychopaths will wear mask, they will not have "MAD PSYCHO" written on their forehead.
Instead they will have charisma, be popular, they will appear friendly and nice, make charity and offer help and service.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
Social anxiety is alarm system.
Idea to be angry at the alarm system is moronic and wrong. Social anxiety stem from the social.
That is why it is called social + anxiety. It is not called self anxiety.
Toxic people are causing social anxiety, we react to.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
Feb 13
Your mind will give back to you exactly what you put into it.
James Joyce
Feb 13
The economic and intellectual conditions that prevail in his own country do not permit the development of individuality. No one who has any self-respect stays in Ireland, but flees afar as though from a country that has undergone the visitation of an angered Jove.
James Joyce
Feb 13
Just one drop of your blood contains billions of strands of DNA, the building blocks of life. A DNA strand like me is a blueprint for building a living thing.
Jurassic Park (1993)
Feb 13
They imprint on the first creature they come in contact with.
Jurassic Park (1993)
I'm still not clear on chaos.
- It simply deals with unpredictability in complex systems. Butterfly effect. Tiny variations, just microscopic, never repeat and vastly affect the outcome. Unpredictability. That's Chaos Theory.
Jurassic Park (1993)
Feb 14
As you know from the testimony of disclosure project witness Carl Wolf, there were structures on the moon that are artificial. Some were newer and some were very ancient.
YT Anonymous Official
https://youtube.com/watch?v=cjHiwLUYgxE
Feb 14
I think hell is something you carry around with you. Not somewhere you go.
Neil Gaiman
Feb 14
Growing up is highly overrated. Just be an author.
Neil Gaiman
Feb 14
I really don't know what "I love you" means. I think it means "Don't leave me here alone"
Neil Gaiman
Feb 14
Fiction has to be convincing, life doesn't.
Neil Gaiman
Feb 14
These creatures require our absence to survive, not our help. And if we could only step aside and trust in nature, life will find a way.
The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
·
Feb 14
Go and make mistakes. Make amazing mistakes. Make glorious & fantastic mistakes. Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for your being here.
Neil Gaiman
Feb 14
As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being.
Carl Jung
Feb 14
We all have self-doubt. You don't deny it, but you also don't capitulate to it. You embrace it.
Kobe Bryant
Feb 15
That which was below, his own brain, the microcosm, had become the macrocosm, and, inside him as microcosm now, he contained the macrocosm, which is to say, what is above.
The Divine Invasion (1981), Philip K. Dick
Feb 15
For normal &sane people any conflict is stressful. It is highly likely that we will re-traumatize ourselves and any standing up for ourselves will end up as new trauma which will haunt us for the rest of life. We may lose our mental health in the process.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
Feb 15
If we try to stand up for ourselves and attempt to confront narcs - we are signaling our brain that we are guilty, that there is something faulty with us, that we are abnormal and ashamed for something that narcissists nitpick around our mistakes, flaws.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
Feb 15
When we do not process guilt and shame, when we hold it in, when we sort of repress it or sweep it under carpet or don't have tools to deal with it, it's insidious in nature. And it can undermine us. Something driven on shame. Let it go.
YT Darla Beam
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIFXgXW3uAw
Feb 15
See, the whole town blamed him for her death, so... He blamed himself.
I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)
Feb 16
Signs of personality disorder:
- issues with self esteem
- inconsistent values
- trouble dealing with stress
- difficulty regulating emotions
- trouble with boundaries
- work difficulties
Personality traits are theorized to develop around age 6 or 7. By that age, how we see the world, our expectations, and how we navigate life.
Trauma can cause personality disorders.
Feb 16
If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.
Abraham Maslow
When people appear to be something other than good and decent, it is only because they are reacting to stress, pain, or the deprivation of basic human needs such as security, love, and self esteem.
Abraham Maslow
No psychological health is possible unless this essential care of the person is fundamentally accepted, loved and respected by others and by himself.
Abraham Maslow
We think we listen, but very rarely do we listen with real understanding, true empathy. Very special kind of listening is the most potent force.
Carl Rogers
Don't ever trust anybody till you know 'em.
Red River (1948)
Feb 16
Don't tell me what to think! I'll take orders about work, but not about what to think.
Red River (1948)
When are you going to stop telling people what to do?
Red River (1948)
Pachacuti solar disc
Ancient Aliens
"I anticipate everyone’s needs before the other person even knows. I do things to meet their needs so that I can feel safe. If their needs aren’t met they will abuse and neglect me"
It equals safety for you at the moment. That's a big awareness
YT Marshall
Boundary setting works really well when you're in a position of power.
Usually the people you're going to have difficulty with is people who are quite narcissistic. Narcissists require other people to build their self-esteem,have particular needs to be met
YT HealthyGamerGG
Power dynamics occur in situations wherein one person can control the consequences of the action of another.
Example: Person A abuses the emotional attachment of person B in order to influence their actions under the threat of consequence
YT HealthyGamerGG
Bludgeoning you with guilt is Power Dynamic. People will looking to you to fulfill their emotional needs and they really want something from you. Problem with narcissists- if you don't give them what they want -they will punish you.
YT HealthyGamerGG
Don't lay boundary+ don't notify someone of a boundary when they need something from you. Setting boundary with them will cause them to escalate. When their needs are acute, it's terrible time to lay a boundary.
YT HealthyGamerGG
Feb 17
Lay boundary well in advance. When they ignore their boundary, because that's what they are going to do, keep boundary firm but never blame them for problem. “I told you so”: they will escalate. You make them feel worse about themselves.
YT HealthyGamerGG
The more narcissists escalate, the more they will try to manipulate you. Don't blame them. Instead cite in some way your own shortcoming. Absolve them of blame. “You're struggling, I cannot focus my mind right now, I'm not able to help you right now”.
Give them second option. Narcissist want their need to be met. Do it tomorrow, not right now. If you are in unfavorable power dynamic you can't draw a line in sand that they're going to respect. Give option that is better for you.
YT HealthyGamerGG
Give them an alternative that is easier for you. That's the boundary you have to hold as best as you can. If you are in unfavorable Power Dynamic situation they will bludgeon you. Blaming them will escalate and they will crush you.
YT HealthyGamerGG
Feb 17
Turn ideas into reality
Deficiency Motivation
to see world in terms of:
- needs of approval
- power
- control
- status
- smartness
- masculinity
- successfulness
Feb 17
The importance of touch:
- reduces stress
- promotes circulation
- stimulates Adrenergic nervous system
- provides pain-relief
- releases oxytocin
- reduces anxiety
- builds rapport
- improves function
- delivers value
Different approaches to dialogue:
Proposing
Building on new ideas
Clarifying
Autonomy:
Do you control your own turf?
A good person is ruined among the great numbers who are not good.
Niccolo Machiavelli
Feb 17
"The world is just"
Feb 17
"We tried forming a collective - no leader, no structure, no power dynamics - but we just ended up flying in a circle over Winnipeg."
Feb 17
Any road followed precisely to its end leads precisely nowhere.
Frank Herbert
Each time you fail you get closer to finding the path to success.
Feb 17
We live in sick society where being kind is perceived as being stupid, and where aggression is perceived as intelligence.
reddit:
"Why smashing social anxiety approach will never work"
Faulty CBT, cheap internet gurus cannot tell us how to handle abuse - because this is highly personal: we are the only ones who know all total circumstances around abuse.
Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.
Maxwell Maltz
Feb 17
Why the hell are you so quick to disbelieve me?
An American Werewolf in London (1981)
Feb 17
John
Landis wrote the screenplay for this film while shooting Kelly's Heroes
(1970) in the countryside of Yugoslavia. While driving along a country
road Landis encountered a gypsy funeral.
IMDb trivia
An American Werewolf in London (1981)
"Therapists warn that over-generosity and kindness towards others can result in a complete absence of self-worth"
Social bullying:
Damaging one's character and isolating or removing them/ostracizing them from their own community.
Bullying is repeated and cannot be resolved through mediation.
Feb 18
Tokyo Rose was a name given by Allied troops in the South Pacific during World War II to all female English-speaking radio broadcasters of Japanese propaganda. The programs were broadcast in the South Pacific and North America to demoralize Allied forces
Tokyo Rose Radio
the best of the 20's, 30's, & 40's
Featuring jazz, big band, and wartime music
https://tokyoroseradio.torontocast.stream
Feb 18
Sparks.
Look, you and us, we're just soldiers. We don't even know what this war is all about. All we do is we die and fight and for what? We don't get anything out of it.
Kelly's Heroes (1970)
Feb 19
A bad attitude is like a flat tire; if you don't change it, you won't go anywhere.
Joyce Meyer
Feb 19
If you can't learn to enjoy your life when you have problems, you may never enjoy it because we'll always have problems.
Joyce Meyer
Feb 19
A wise man always lets his mistakes educate him.
Joyce Meyer
Wisdom is doing now what you will be happy with later on.
Joyce Meyer
The ultimate freedom is to be free from the need to impress others.
Joyce Meyer
80% of people's problems are about how they feel about themselves.
Joyce Meyer
Feb 19
Have the courage to be different. Unhappiness comes when you try to be like everyone else rather than embracing the unique person that you are.
Joyce Meyer
You become trapped in familiarity. All the days merge into one another, they become weeks and months and then years. People around you are always the same. You find you've become part of the office machinery. One of them. You don't advance,retreat. You merely exist
Moments (1974)
Feb 19
I lived this life to the full. Do you realize we will never have these moments together again? How should we spend them?
Moments (1974)
Feb 19
You saw a pathetic figure huddled at that table holding revolver. And you couldn't let that happen because you're so full of life, you couldn't believe that anyone could be tired of it, that life was a burden, something to be endured.
Moments (1974)
Dostoevsky argued that with a void of religious faith and a deeply flawed, irrational human nature, this worldview (self-interest as the driving force) would become destructive. Resolving suffering toward perfection create new problems
YT Pursuit of Wonder
The more grandiose solutions the more complex and perhaps destructive the new problems. Humanity would rather go mad or destroy its perfect conditions than live as if it fit into a mechanical system.
YT The Harder You Try, The Worse It Gets - Dostoevsky
Feb 19
This is the coastal town
That they forgot to close down
Armageddon, come Armageddon
Come, Armageddon, come
Everyday is like Sunday
Everyday is silent and grey
Morrissey - Everyday Is Like Sunday (1988)
Not because his wife cooked for him, but because she cooked for him despite his ill-mannered demand— one he orchestrated in the first place.
It is the cement of social relationships in Japan.
The bias toward what is known may lead to wrong or delayed diagnoses that bring harmful consequences.
Perhaps we can start to gain insights into these blind spots by adding the notion of hypocognition to our cognitive arsenal.
Leave it to the Druids!
Hypocognition was used as a form of social control, to dispel unwanted concepts by never elaborating on them. After all, how can you feel something that doesn’t exist in the first place?
Feb 20
When we don’t have the cognitive tools, or we lack the words to understand something, we are in hypocognition. In hypocognition, we do not possess the mental tools to comprehend or perceive something.
https://cognitiontoday.com/what-is-cognition-executive-functions-and-cognitive-processes/
Feb 20
When we overapply a cognitive structure where it isn’t appropriate, we are in a state of hypercognition.
https://cognitiontoday.com/what-is-cognition-executive-functions-and-cognitive-processes/
Feb 21
What's blocking you?
You don't want to depend on anyone else's permission. It's like they have this oppressor keeping them down (which is you). Then you come into self-help instead realizing power is in you, you look for a hero.
YT JulienHimself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmbwDnbgq_E
Feb 21
Self Validation is a way to recognize, accept, and honor one's own internal experiences without making any judgements and criticisms. It helps to better understand yourself.
Feb 21
Appetites of the autocrat cannot be appeased. They must be opposed. Autocrats only understand one word: No, No, No.
Joe Biden
Feb 22
Our emotions are normal and fine - there is nothing to change. The only problem are abusers who choose to abuse and who take advantage of capitalism and Catholic church hierarchy toxic mindset to abuse other people around who are in "lower" positions.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
Feb 22
Occam's Razor states:
"the simplest solution is almost always the best."
Feb 23
If a men tells you he knows a thing exactly, then you can be safe in inferring that you are speaking to an inexact man.
Bertrand Russell
Feb 23
Ironic Process Theory:
The more we try to suppress thoughts, the more they surface.
When denying something it often has the opposite effect: makes you want it more.
Ironic process theory
Occam's Razor:
God did it.
People don't resist change.
They resist being changed.
Feb 23
Self-limiting and self-fulfilling belief might well stop you doing something you're perfectly capable of doing.
Feb 23
Apollonia: Will you help me?
The Kid: No. Wanna know why? Because you wouldn't pass the initiation.
Apollonia: What initiation?
The Kid: Well, for starters, you have to purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
Purple Rain (1984)
Feb 23
I'm not a woman
I'm not a man
I am something that you'll never understand
I'll never beat you
I'll never lie
And if you're evil I'll forgive you by and by, 'cause
You, I would die for you, yeah
Prince - I Would Die 4 U (1984)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkNl3pq1twE
Feb 23
Despite everything, no one can dictate who you are to other people.
Prince
Feb 23
Speak your heart.
If they don't understand, the message was never meant for them anyway.
Prince
Feb 23
Prince explained the meaning of 'Purple Rain' as:
"purple rain pertains to the end of the world and being with the one you love and letting your faith/god guide you through the purple rain."
https://www.smoothradio.com/features/prince-purple-rain-meaning-lyrics-facts/
Feb 23
People who have no creativity, talent, or courage are the ones who follow the rules. The passion that lies inside of you means you don't need to follow the pack.
Prince
Feb 24
If you never told someone “Here is the limit-This is too much” a lot of time they can't figure that out on their own. Express boundary in a healthy way. Ultimately it has to be win-win. Create situation it is win for me and win for you.
YT JulienHimself
Feb 24
If you never told someone “Here is the limit-This is too much” a lot of time they can't figure that out on their own. Express boundary in a healthy way. Ultimately it has to be win-win. Create situation it is win for me and win for you.
YT JulienHimself
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/WTMlEOm38aU
Feb 24
Donald Trump made Alf rich in alternate universe.
(ALF S3 Ep2)
😱🧐👽
https://youtu.be/zB0zgMS58lo?t=692
Feb 24
48th César Awards (French Oscars) awarded Spanish "As Bestas" ("The Beasts") as the Best Foreign movie.
Feb 24
Brad Pitt few moments ago at 48th César Awards.
Feb 25
Lewin's change model is a simple and easy-to-understand framework to humanize the change management process. These three distinct stages of change (unfreeze, change, and refreeze) allow you to plan & implement the required change.
(whatfix)
Feb 25
The art of life is a constant readjustment to our surroundings.
Okakura Kakuzō
Feb 25
You can become all you're born to be if you do what nobody else will do – and they will call you lucky.
HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1Jfk9jlCII
Feb 25
Second stage of Kurt Lewin "3 model change":
"Developing new ways of reacting on the basis of new information"
Feb 25
Behavior is equal to factors in external environment.
Feb 25
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
Albert Einstein
Feb 25
True life is lived when tiny changes occur.
Leo Tolstoy
Feb 25
Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
Oscar Wilde
Feb 25
People support what they create.
Kurt Lewin
Feb 25
Inside Shame Culture:
- Control is maintained by shame and the complementary threat of ostracism.
- Concept of honor can lead to revenge dynamics.
- "How people will look at me"
Appearances.
Feb 25
Culture of shame silences abuse victims.
https://tdri.or.th/en/2022/06/culture-of-shame-silences-abuse-victims/culture-of-shame-thumb/
Feb 25
Value of past mistakes and No Shame/No blame chart.
Feb 25
Homer Simpson's secret shame.
Feb 25
Embrace uncertainty.
Feb 25
The best fighter is never angry.
Lao Tzu
Feb 25
"The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists."
Japanese proverb
Feb 25
The real wealth of a good gardener is not his salary, but the marvelous flowers he is raising in the garden!
Mehmet Murat İldan
Feb 25
You can cut all the flowers, but you cannot keep spring from coming.
Pablo Neruda
Feb 26
The best teacher is the one who teaches you how to be your own teacher.
Mehmet Murat İldan
Feb 26
She held on to that offense. It was poisoning her spirit. Making her insecure and easily offended. When you don't let go of things, they never heal. Anytime her husband didn't agree with her, it was like touching a bruise.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88CKi2i8t-M
Feb 26
Pay attention to your inner life. It's easy to adapt to things that are poisoning us and we don't realize it. We end up going through life just treating the symptoms. If we would get to root cause, and get our soul healthy we'd have good health
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88CKi2i8t-M
Feb 26
Question we need to ask ourselves is am I making myself sick? Am I sabotaging my relationships? Am I limiting my potential? Holding myself down? Because my souls unhealthy? Hebrews says: Make sure no root of bitterness springs and defiles you.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=88CKi2i8t-M&t=551s
Feb 26
We treat symptoms because we can see the symptoms. It's obvious. We have to go deeper. We have to deal with the root. Get that infection out. As long as the root is there, the fruit will be bitter. You control what is in your soul.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88CKi2i8t-M
Feb 26
Never apologize, contentious – that is one of those toxins we can't always see. You have to look deeper, it's under the surface. When your soul is healthy you're loving and kind, you see the best in others, peacemaker, you let them be right.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88CKi2i8t-M
Feb 26
You must often visit the darkness to get the people lost in the darkness out of there!
Mehmet Murat İldan
Feb 26
Apricot blossom stranded in the snowfall.
Feb 26
The Rashomon Effect
Feb 26
Poorly justified true beliefs vs. Knowledge
Feb 26
In 1938, the song was a smash hit in Nazi Germany under its Germanized title "Bei mir bist du schön".
An uproar occurred when its Jewish provenance was abruptly discovered.
(wiki)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGveTSQbH30
Feb 26
The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.
Socrates
Feb 26
We do not see thing as they are, we see things as we are.
The Rashomon Effect
Feb 26
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
Laozi
Feb 26
Respond intelligently even to unintelligent treatment.
Laozi
Feb 26
When many people know many things, it is difficult to rule them.
Laozi
Feb 26
Have patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear.
Laozi
Feb 26
A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.
Laozi
Feb 26
In the world there is nothing more submissive and weak than water. Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong nothing can surpass it.
Laozi
Feb 26
An over-sharpened sword cannot last long.
Laozi
Feb 26
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.
Laozi
Feb 26
So many things that I'm afraid of (afraid of)
But right now I ain't scared of nothin'
('Cause all I know is)
(All I know is, all I, all I)
'Cause all I know it's 10:35
And I can feel your arms around me
Tiësto - 10:35 ft. Tate McRae
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3H6AYSYCQE
Feb 26
Man just wants to forget the bad stuff and believe in the made-up good stuff. It's easier that way.
Rashomon (1950)
Feb 26
If men don't trust each other, this earth might as well be hell. I don't want this place to be hell.
- Shouting doesn't help. In the end, you cannot understand the things men do.
Rashomon (1950)
Feb 26
I don't have time to mind everyone's feelings. If you're not selfish, you can't survive. Everyone is selfish and dishonest. Making excuses. The bandit, the woman, the man and you! And you aren't?
Rashomon (1950)
Feb 27
Never let your mind tell you I don't know. That's BS. Never say I can't afford it. Brain will go, ok. If you change it to "how?" – now you start thinking. When you start identifying what you are afraid: stay in retrospection.
YT JulienHimself Clips
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXspCwwheDo
Feb 27
In healthy dynamic where you were supported, this concern what other people think is very small, localized to people who really matter to you. When that family home is unsafe, no shelter to be ourselves then everything becomes unsafe.
YT Marshall Burtcher
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwGdtU55pW0
Feb 27
In all healthy relationships, there is you, other person and other element: fantasy. We both enter into this third element. Remind yourself it is not about them, it is about this third element that we created.
YT RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1MhMan917E
Feb 27
Word "trigger" I think it is a little too simple for what happens to survivors of narcissistic abuse. When your strings get plucked give yourself a minute to recover. Take a break, give yourself a breather, let the vibrating stop.
YT DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxe3ORqW2CM
Feb 27
With betrayal trauma it can get a lot complicated. Because what may seem like ordinary experiences - to others can be moments that are very unsettling. Relationship trauma are not clear cut, there may be judgement when you have been plucked in reaction.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=yxe3ORqW2CM
Feb 27
The unconscious is structured like a language.
Jacques Lacan
Feb 27
The truth is the error that escapes delusion and is reached from a misunderstanding.
Jacques Lacan
Feb 27
I always tell the truth. Not the whole truth, because one can't.
Jacques Lacan
Feb 28
Narcissists are masters of suppression. These individuals with their desire to stay in superior position, they constantly try to figure out what can I reveal to get me in a good place, what I need to refrain from talking about to maintain mèritum .
YT S.N
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLZl-Go9Psw
In their need to ideal they'll hold down certain elements who they are. Inadvertently they wind up to train you to be guarded and cautious and careful in a way that you engage. So you wind up suppressing your emotions in reverse.
YT Surviving Narcissism
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLZl-Go9Psw
Feb 28
People that are sick, they're not themselves. They say things they don't mean, they act in ways they wouldn't ordinarily act but if you ever talk to me like that again - I'll punch your heart out.
ALF S1 E7
Feb 28
This is why I love ORF Radio Kärnten, the only radio station with lovely yet unknown songs like this:
Bonjour soleil · Lydie Auvray (1997)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7u8SQqi4iw
Feb 28
How do you know so much about dreams?
- Well, when it's all you have, you kind of become an expert.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)
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