Mastodon 2023 October

Oct 1

Bart didn't show up for school

Oct 1

Unconsciously your desire to keep the peace in a slightly people pleaser in codependent way when you should just leave. Your desire to keep the peace to make things okay, and to save that vulnerable child you see, keeps you in a state of hyper-vigilance where you now have to become somewhat manipulative, you now have to become somewhat controlling because you're trying to avoid the landmines that you're dancing through daily.
🟥 The Split Personality of the Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wY6fVYiGrdl

Oct 1

When they were abusive to you why didn't you leave? Because you're storing the memories in two different places which creates dissociation. What's the essence of schizophrenia? Now called dissociative identity disorder. Massive trauma creates Freeze response which is by any other name Dissociation. The freeze response is the essence of dissociation. These 2 memories  not integrating truth what you're experiencing.
🟥 The Split Personality of the Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wY6fVYiGrdl

Oct 1

Way out is to integrate the memory and exercises around assigning the appropriate emotion to those memories. The right emotion. The appropriate emotion. If somebody aggresses against you and you become indignant and angry, that's appropriate. If somebody aggresses against you and you become sexually aroused and enamored to them, that's not appropriate response. It's trauma that will mess that up.
🟥 The Split Personality of the Narcissist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wY6fVYiGrdI

Oct 2

Having social anxiety puts you in good company with a lot of makers. Further, if you would venture out to some local maker spaces and see how comfortable you may feel in those spaced because you may find them populated by a lot of like-minded folks.
It took me a long time to realize I have social anxiety, too. And it makes me tense in unique ways. I learned my tension shows in my mouth before my brain.
🟥 Adam Savage’s Tested
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqmehFe8pGU

 

Oct 2

Fascism is the frenzy of sexual cripples.
🟦 Wilhelm Reich

Oct 2

Only you yourself can be your liberator.
🟦 Wilhelm Reich

 Oct 2

You want to make other people comfortable so you morph yourself into certain type of personality.
Secret:
Your life gets exponentially easier when you decide exactly who you want to be and then show up as that person as often as possible. The goal being all the time.
🟥 Are You a People Pleaser?
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/a2Y83q8Oro0

Oct 2

Traumatized person sees normal and healthy and sane people as nuisance and boring. While sado-mazo cruel and brutal narcissists are perceived as sexy and attractive and that we must serve them and obey their command and abuse.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/07/m

Oct 2

Spiral of silence Theory

Oct 2

Teachers

Oct 2

You can't have safety without trust, and respect and kindness.
🟥 Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVyv3GPRJm0

Oct 2

“I won't tolerate those behaviors” that is surefire way to weed out some toxic people- because you will immediately be labeled as too much. A narcissist doesn't want to work too hard to manipulate someone, there's plenty fish in the sea.
🟥 Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVyv3GPRJm0

Oct 2

The best way to prevent toxic person entering your life is by fully understanding what toxic behavior looks like and then being assertive about what is right and wrong. The right person will have no issue with that. The wrong person will be extremely offended and will shame you for it.
🟥 Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVyv3GPRJm0

Oct 2

It seems counter-intuitive - if deep down you haven't healed those wounds, and you have core belief that you don't deserve to be valued or prioritized or respected. And even if you met the right person, you will reject them. Because your mind is still threatened by their selflessness and kindness. This is part of becoming the right type of person. Self compassion, honoring our inner child, protecting them, forgiving ourselves, learning boundaries.
🟥 Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVyv3GPRJm0

 

Oct 2

It doesn't eliminate the risk that someone won't take advantage of us. But it gives us framework for what we know we deserve which is respect and warmth and someone to be able to have discussion with us without turning it into fight. You deserve someone to care when they unintentionally hurt you. Someone who encourages and invited your feelings instead of punishes you for them. Not looking to complete us. This is not working for me instead make it
🟥 Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVyv3GPRJm0

Oct 3

"A lot of people I've met really dislike me when I'm at full confidence. It's very discouraging. I'm no longer letting others determine how comfortable I can be in my own skin."

Oct 3

I've started second batch of Ambient music. The first record is inspired by the Eastern Islands:
Moai
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJ5lcEIkqDY

Oct 3

Making second track "Caribbean Blue" I learned about some exotic Caribbean instruments -
Bongo drum, Conga, Steelpan, Guiro, Maracas, Marimba, Claves and Bata drum
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOFM5RYCHr0

 Oct 4

"Kernberg's second developmental task, overcoming splitting, those with BPD failed that task in early childhood, that's one of the nurture parts, aka, toxic environment,"

Oct 4

Naming the shame, beating yourself up in certain situations when in fact it's not for you to be shameful about. What happened to me was actually not shameful especially around abuse. Noticing what is the story that goes with it. What am I telling myself. What is this emotion attached to the shame. Intercept it before you get into spiral of toxic shame where inner critic takes over and debilitates you.
🟥 5 Ways To Break The Cycle of Toxic Shame
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNaXFqdU-8g

Oct 4

 Most people who never experienced hysterical authority figures in childhood know how to regulate themselves and then they appear "normal" and without mood swings -
not because they are normal, but because they never were imprinted with mentally ill untreated psychopath's behavior in childhood.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/07/m

Oct 4

The cult leader or cult system plays on the person's values and ideology such as their hope for a better world, or more equitable system. Then cult strip the person's identity away, systematically. Deprogramming step: breaking people out of these fears, their fear if they say or do x or y that something bad would happen. Or defying what they were taught. Or twisted beliefs about work ethics. Mistrust of the world needs to be worked through.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wT1GzRmR1rk

 Oct 4

The first thing that has to happen is breaking out of the belief system of the narcissistic person. For lifetime you're told you're not good enough, too demanding, stupid, liar. Basically you were told they are right, you are wrong. Even didn't say these out loud, their neglect, withdrawal, abandonment being chronically. Second piece is to de-isolate yourself. Social support is essential, people see you accurately.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wT1GzRmR1rk

Oct 4

Third, honor your nervous system. These unexpressed wounds of emotional abuse get held there. Because we often could not fight back in these relationships. Nightmares, dissociative moments years after. Fourth piece is slowly to take yourself back. If you came into narcissistic relationship since birth, you may not know even got chance to explore or develop you. Narc relationships are like noisy scaffolds that surround us, drown out our own voice.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wT1GzRmR1rk

Oct 4

Feeling you get when you're with someone narcissistic or antagonistic it's something you just can't name. You just feel it when you're with them. In their presence, from the beginning, I felt on edge, like if I didn't win them over they would walk. Or as if they were looking right through me. But it's in their presence from the beginning I felt uncomfortable. We often to not pay attention to these feelings because of them not being validated.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqXkVETx1Bg

Oct 4

Your extroverted nature means that you want to be with other people but your newly developed social anxiety means it becomes more and more difficult be with other people without wondering if you are saying and doing the wrong thing because the narcissistic person has infected you with this idea that you sound foolish or that you are doing and saying the wrong thing with other people. It is muddied up with this uncomfortable anxiety, doubt yourself socially.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3Jmvh_TS8E

Oct 4

The third track was inspired by Bounty Mutineers and Pitcairn Islands
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jSCC4zh2v4

 Oct 4

I used to catch this boy masturbating with every vegetable in the fridge.
🎞️ Eating Out 2 Sloppy Seconds (2006)

Oct 4

Be who you are, it's the only way you can live with yourself.
🎞️ Eating Out 2 Sloppy Seconds (2006)

Oct 5

Fourth Ambiental track is inspired by 1990's Tom Hanks movie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjdKs2qiOf

Oct 5

Why did you put up with his shit?
- You know how you tell yourself that it's gonna get better and you know it's not, but you hang on to any little good thing he does is proof that it might get better...
🎞️ Eating Out: All You Can Eat (2009)

Oct 6

Gaslighting is one of the primary ways in which narcissistic parent and narcissistic families destroy self trust. To be manipulated we have to let go of our Self trust. If we can destroy your self trust then you're going to be more depended on me. Gaslighting is one of the main ways to do that. Gaslighting is hidden manipulation. “I didn't mean that way” implies your perceiver is broken, you can't see BS what it is. There are negative consequences
🟥 Jerry Wise MA, MS, CLC
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wamyWrhbrFY

 Oct 6

Whenever you get labeling from other people it always raises the issue of self doubt. “You're just a codependent”. “You have tons of issues in that area” I might, but what you accusing me of really didn't happen. I may in fact be codependent but it doesn't mean everything I perceive is wrong. Thirdly, it never happened. “I never said that”. They'll rewrite, edit history. Child thinks, I am not important. Appeal to authority – believe what I am say
🟥 Jerry Wise MA, MS, CLC
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wamyWrhbrFY

Oct 6

“You're just too sensitive”. I don't think I am, I don't think my sensitivity has to do anything with this issue. Is this true or not? It's not whether I am sensitive, who cares. If I am right I'm right, sensitivity may have nothing to do with that. Narcissistic parent say You're too sensitive in gaslighting and shaming way. They want to tell you what to think, shake your judgment and to doubt yourself.
🟥 Jerry Wise MA, MS, CLC
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wamyWrhbrFY

 Oct 6

Narcissistic person will criticize, ridicule, even shame a person is close to them for helping someone else. “What did they ever do for you”, very strict quid pro quo. Tell you that you are being played for sucker.  They need not you look better than them. Even in professional situations where you offer free mentor-ship they may frame it as wasting your time to someone who can't help you. Narc is performatively helpful if everyone is there to see.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmF6C0QWQmU

Oct 6

They think its foolish to just give it away. It is that chronic low empathy – big part of narcissistic picture. They just don't have that visceral reaction to want to help someone else and they will often view other people who are sick or in need as an inconvenience , as a problem, something not to deal with. And it's easier to pathologize and devalue the people who step up and help than to view themselves as the problem.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmF6C0QWQmY

Oct 6

"beware of having empathy for the narcissist.

it's like giving a gunshooter extra bullets to finish you off, in case they missed wiping you out the first time."

Oct 6

Fifth ambient track is happy cruise
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOQW5V7UDBs

Oct 7

Don't ask God for fewer problems, challenges – ask God to make you more experienced. And to show you how you can become bigger, and stronger in the spirit when you go through tough times.
✝️ HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAXsBpA-Oy0

Oct 7

Biggest question is how do you help someone who's going through trauma, some horrible surprise got them, how to be pastor to that person? I learned that there is a temptation is so often to fix the problem or to give advice even if you're not a doctor. And really that's not the solution. The solution often is to just show up. Just be there. 90% is just showing up. Don't worry what to say, Lord will give you the words. You'll figure out as you go along.
✝️ HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAXsBpA-Oy0

Oct 7

6th ambient track has sounds of Dubrovnik
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgrGiHbRSzl

Oct 8

I realized enemy is not fighting you where you are, enemy fight you where you go.
✝️ The Fight For Your Future | Joel Osteen

Oct 8

If I am going to be around difficult persons and I know that they can trigger me or they can say something, same old again, I have rehearsed answer – and I think about that in advance, if they do this, what I am going to say. I have rehearsed answer in my mind and I know you won't catch me off guard, I'll be in control of my on tongue, thoughts and my attitudes. I have gentle answer, know this in advance.
🟥 Day 6: Dealing with Difficult People
✝️ Joel Osteen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPbM3kTOAd8

Oct 8

It investigated whether Psilocybin taken in a religious setting could induce experiences comparable to those described by the great mystics.
"I was seeing things like I had never seen them before. If our eyes are open and if we are able to perceive and take that in."
Experiment demonstrated that psychedelics could indeed open the doors of perception.
BBC Knowledge
🟥 Marsh Chapel Experiment - Timothy Leary
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxDZW6n69-0

 

Oct 8

In which they administrated psilocybin to prisoners and the hope was that it was going to decrease recidivism. Unfortunately the results of that study were marred because they were improperly and inaccurately reported.
🟥 Richard Griffiths PH.D on the Concord Prison Experiment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZZBg2iH8vM

Oct 8

What is an example of an intrusive person?
Intrusiveness violates a person's space or privacy, habitually encroaching beyond social norms or the recipient's stated boundaries and limits. Infringements such as looking through belongings, eavesdropping, habitually giving unwanted opinions, advice, or comments, and “checking up” are types of intrusions.
⬜ Abusive, Intrusive, Neglectful - Dr. Mark Steinberg
https://marksteinberg.com/webpages/wri

Oct 8

Its easier to fool someone than to convince them they have been fooled.

Oct 8

Psychological language that is common for narcissism is criticism. They are highly competitive how they engage with others. They learn life is one big performance: always being graded, have to perform correctly so that you get good evaluation. So conformity, agenda is emphasized, looks, achievement. Not going into deeper issue who they are, what is their purpose, how to manage emotions. Instead they make grade or not.
🟥 When Narcissists Habitually Criticize
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWyGxBcBps

Oct 8

Healthy people keep criticism minimal, make sure upbeat of life is focused on. Narcissist's strategy is their judgments minimize the sting of being judged. If they portray other individuals who are deficient then their complaints about who they are - are less than powerful. When you are around narcissist, you will hear a lot of criticism. Micro-bullying, sometimes anger, mean and strong bullying so that they can be caller of shots.
🟥 When Narcissists Habitually Criticize
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWyGxBcBps

 

 Oct 8

Your task is to ask what's really at stake inside that narcissist that prompts them to be so naturally critical. They just want you to just feel bad about yourself. Objectivity will keep you on right track, knowing that there is something that they're just not coming to terms with within themselves. Critical person advertise they put focus on outside world. They take delight in other people's struggles, sadistic. Get charge at it.
🟥 When Narcissists Habitually Criticize
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWyGxBcBps

Oct 8

All they think is in terms of their own agenda. Which means you're supposed to conform. Shame and humiliation is their currency. Just being critical elevates who they are, it gives them a competitive edge in their mind. Other's success diminishes them, part of twisted reasoning. Can't manage complexity so they diminish. They are threatened by other's freedom or independence. Criticism is undertone of their anger, didn't manage it.
🟥 When Narcissists Habitually Criticize
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWyGxBcBps

Oct 8

Being correct for them is far more important than being loving, caring or empathic. In criticism they are constantly in defense mode. Being offensive keeps them from looking at their own issues, protect them, gives them feeling of power and dominance. They are constantly victim, as they pronounce judgement it is never in constructive mode. It's all about you, your insecurities to be build on someone else's expense.
🟥 When Narcissists Habitually Criticize
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWyGxBcBps

 

Oct 8

Todays ambient track is Maltese
https://youtu.be/Sbi-11BVTds?si=mXi6Gh

Oct 9

Adam's bridge as and Indian/Sri Lanka wildlife are incorporated in this experimental ambient track.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atiH30rgLA

Oct 9

Social prestige shaped English pronunciation.

Oct 9

But the truth about Hungarians which they do try to cover up is that they are no more crooked than the rest of us. But not the way they tell. The whole Hungarian friends that I have I can't remember one who wouldn't want to think of him as a King of con-man.
🎞️ F for Fake (1973)

Oct 9

I met a welfare worker years later who told me he spent weeks trying to woe some of the refugees back to civilization.
🎞️ F for Fake (1973)

Oct 9

Oja Kodar is a Croatian actress, screenwriter and director known as Orson Welles's romantic partner during the later years of his life. Wikipedia

Oct 10

ADHD traits align very well with someone being hunter, we're always scanning for frets, even if we're in social situation we tend to notice the fret straight away. And this leads to sense of rejection. Because it's almost as if you're trying to win that person's worth and you want to prove that you are good person, want to be liked. The reason we're so hypersensitive – is defense mechanism. It's way of picking bad and good people
🟥 Conquering Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xOkS8vfQL4

 

Oct 10

I can be literally the most harmless person while being considerate of other people's feelings and yet somehow people always assume the worst about me. So I am at loss here. I sincerely don't know what I'm doing wrong. Am I walking on the wrong side of pavement, am I scowling at strangers without my awareness? Do I just give off bad vibes to other people? It attract a lot of unwanted attention from most people.
🟥 In the Fog
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEcs3cV_b00

 

Oct 10

Confidence is not walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, its walking into a room not comparing yourself to anyone at all.

Social anxiety happens when you value other people’s opinions more than your own

Oct 10

Today's ambient experimental music I created has sounds from Australia
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CbXr7RyYkR

Oct 11

These individuals suffer greatly. There's a lot of shame and self-hatred, a lack of identity. A lack of purpose and meaning. If we had grown up in a healthy loving safe family – we would not develop the degree and intensity and distress of wounded parts that you will see in borderline clients. Instead you would have strong sense of self that would be able “to drive the bus” of your life.
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma With Mary Brownlie, MA, LPC
https://www.youtube.com/@healingcomplextra

Oct 11

Quiet BPD is anger turned inwards instead of exploding to other people. The average person would never know that they had BPD. They can fly under the radar, the symptoms are not obvious to others. And relationships are their source of identity. Oftentimes they are codependent, depend on other people for their happiness and their identity. They tend to be loyal, submissive, humble and more vulnerable and over-controlling help to suppress emotions
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inrzGKlTUt8

 

Oct 11

I use IFS, talking about all borderline symptoms as just wounded parts that are trying to help the client to survive and get their needs met. And teaching them about Self and Self energy. Self is not a wounded part. Self has ability to feel calm and centered and connected to other people, Self has wisdom and courage. It is just this beautiful, calm energy. That is our authentic self. Wounded parts are full of extreme emotions, try to help system.
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inrzGKlTUt8

 

Oct 11

Splitting – very quickly they will have an incorrect perception of someone else's thoughts and feelings or behaviors, and react to that person out of their incorrect perceptions. Their perceptions are based on trauma. If we have our perceptions not based in reality but are based on trauma, it's going to drive a wide degree of distress. And you'll see rapid extreme shift whoever is triggering them in the moment.
🟥 A Gentle & Compassionate Approach To Healing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_q5fv_Kejdw

 Oct 11

IFS is all about restoring self-leadership or authentic self. So instead of trauma symptoms and thoughts, feelings and perceptions that go along with being a trauma survivor we restore healthy connection to our authentic self. Self gets to “drive the bus” instead of wounded child parts. Wounded parts are tiny children trying to survive. Our bodies and brains did not choose survival responses, they automatically happened.
🟥 A Gentle & Compassionate Approach To Healing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_q5fv_Kejdw

Oct 11

It's up to you.

Oct 11

Firefighter parts try to stop the pain right now, so they can be pretty extreme: binge eating, addictive behavior, excessive spending, risky behavior. Both Managers and Firefighters, their attentions are good. None of these parts have bad intentions. They're just trying to protect us from pain. Often they shoot us in the foot. That used us in the past but doesn't really serve us right now in the present.
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma with Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UON37a_56Lw

 

Oct 11

People pleasing hides the real you. Oftentimes we're not using our voice, we're not taking care of our own needs, it's a painful thing to experience. Shutting your own needs down repeatedly to keep other people happy. IFS the whole goal is not to get rid of the parts, it is to transform them and allow them to be who they authentically actually really are. A lot of them are exhausted for protecting us for so long.
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma with Internal Family Systems Th.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UON37a_56Lw

Oct 11

We're not going to just sit there and let people mistreat us anymore. But we're able to protect ourselves in healthy and positive way.
A lot of these parts, natural child parts, like curiosity, exploration, playfulness, humor – they were normal parts of you at one point, that got recruited to do these jobs: people pleasing, drinking, to stop the pain. They're exhausted, they don't want to do that job.
🟥 Healing Complex Trauma with Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UON37a_56Lw

Oct 11

Sea of Titan - ambient experimental music
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5jwiVbkhn

Oct 12

You ask them to do something simple and they accuse you of being overly demanding if asking too much. So you start to ask for less and less. You lower your standards, they lower your expectations. They raise your expectations by doing things for you, being for you in the first place, so you believe you can rely upon this person. Once they got you where they want, they stop doing those things. They appeal to your conscience.
🟥 Understanding Narcissism, by Elizabeth Shaw.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-l6sXU3jipc

Oct 12

Working on new ambient music I learned:
"Why are they called Monégasque?
Possibly because -asco / -ascu / — asque is a Ligurian suffix frequently found in toponyms and related adjectives. Monaco is the Italian version of the local Ligurian name Monegu, from which local Ligurian monegascu, Italian monegasco, and French monegasque." (quora)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8iasC70FI

Oct 13

We're still dealing with maybe if I twist myself into a pretzel maybe he'll calm down. Or maybe if I figure out what set her off then she'll relax and she won't leave me. So when we're in the middle of that we don't always realize that we are being consistently and chronically invalidated. If you're someone who's healthy this makes you really uncomfortable. You want to flow, grow, work, take accountability.
🟥 Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life coaCh Inc.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D51wzhjThFl

 

Oct 13

In those moments when I notice my reaction coming about through, body sensations, I can stop myself and say It is different now. I do not need to react the way I normally do in this situation so I'm going to stop and choose a different path. I've never learned what communication was. That's why I get anxious when I have two-way conversation at times. Because I never saw an appropriate, productive conversation happened.
🟥 Growing up with an alcoholic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMKiaWRx9AY

 

Oct 13

I grew up hypervigilant aware of my surroundings. I learned that at young age – am I safe? What do I need to do? I'm always on guard. What's happening? How do I survive? Down to root of it is my control keeps me safe. Because if I don't control, I may die. If I don't predict, I may die. If I don't please other people out there, I may die. It's about survival. As an adult when I get triggered it goes to my brain I developed a long time ago.
🟥 Growing up with an alcoholic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMKiaWRx9AY

Oct 13

I allowed myself to be belittled by my ex-wife, I allowed that. I didn't stand up for myself. My mom didn't stand up for herself. Because I learned from my alcoholic father is you cannot stand up to somebody who's aggressive – you will lose. And if you try to stand up, you may die.
🟥 Growing up with an alcoholic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMKiaWRx9AY

Oct 13

We can be rational as adults, but know these insecurities, these anxieties may be rooted in your need to survive and what you needed to do to survive, therefore your emotions that show up now are there because they're intended to keep you alive, survive and have opposite effect.
🟥 Growing up with an alcoholic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMKiaWRx9AY

 Oct 13

Sophie came to realization that Jerry and her mother shared tendency towards being insensitive towards to emotions of others. Sophie realized during therapy that her emotional isolation from Jerry was a resurgence of feeling she had experienced as a child. Animosity towards his lack of emotional responsiveness had its origins in her youth. Frequently experience feelings of culpability for their misery.
📖 Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mdv9nL4UFA

Oct 13

This is to be expected if they were reared in a family environment that failed to provide emotional support or impose consequences for expressing distress affect phobia which is psychological condition characterized by an intense aversion to specific emotions may result in development of rigid constrained personality. These emotionally underdeveloped adults experience an automatic anxiety response to intense emotional connections as adults.
📖 Adult Children of Emotionally
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mdv9nL4UFA

Oct 13

She had consistently harbored concerns regarding societal perceptions and was fixated on her father's disapproval. Virginia came to understanding via therapy that her social anxiety was a reflection of her childhood role in which she endeavored ceaselessly to earn her father's affection. Her panic attacks indicated she was started to doubt the authority figure is at all times belief she had  held since childhood.
📖 Lindsay C. Gibson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mdv9nL4UFA

 Oct 13

Trauma affects how you feel about yourself. Generally, the child takes things personally. When bad things happen to the child, they believe it's because they're bad, so they have a lifelong sense of shame. They trust some people when they shouldn't. It distorts development in multiple ways. When people are unconscious and in tremendous pain their range of choice is greatly limited. Let's give them genuine support.
🟥 Dr. Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5emHDaONA1l

Oct 13

One of the things you learn is you start noticing these body states that you're in and the mental hoops that you jump through, but you don't identify with them. It's a matter of observing this all this stuff and not identifying with it. Not letting taking you over as it tends to. This isn't about the present. This is an old unresolved not yet fully resolved wound. Age 79 and I'm still upset at not being seen. I don't care of people don't agree with me.
🟥 Doctor Gabor Mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7zWT3l3DV0

Oct 13

Compulsively concerned with the emotional needs of others rather than their own, identified with duty role and responsibility rather than their own true selves, tend to suppress healthy anger, so they tend to be very nice and peacemakers, tend to believe they are responsible never to disappoint other – those people tend to develop auto-immune disease.
🟥 Doctor Gabor Mate: The Shocking Link Between Kindness & Illness!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7zWT3l3DV0

Oct 13

When you repress your emotions you can also undermine your immune system and our immune system will not recognize the malignancy and not destroy it.
When you recognize trauma it's not in order to use it as an excuse but to actually overcome it. Healthy anger is not outrage, it's “you're in my space, get out” or to protect something.
Fit of rage is getting worse, that is unhealthy anger. For trigger there has to be explosive material (never felt understood)
🟥 Gabor Mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7zWT3l3DV0

Oct 13

The final ambient track for "Seashore" is here:
https://youtu.be/o8SMLmuNV0E

Oct 14

Any religion without love and compassion is false. It's a lie.
🎞️ Children of the Corn (1984)

Oct 14

 Don't give me dope. Don't put me under again. I'm trying to talk to you. God, please let them hear me. All I'm asking for is for you to take one little idea that's in my mind and put it into their minds. But they won't listen. They won't hear me. All they do is give me dope. And I go down and down.
🎞️ Johnny Got His Gun (1971)

Oct 14

Because Megan was so trusting and was so outgoing, she tended to be an easy target. Men who are accustomed to looking for women who could be easy prey absolutely could tell that Megan wanted to please, that Megan wanted somebody to care for her, and that she was lonely.
🟥 Unsolved Mysteries with Robert Stack - Season 12 Episode 1 - Full Episode
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nBm5qkSy4w

Oct 15

“I'll feel good about myself when I lose 10 pounds” “When I control my temper better”. The problem with that approach is when you cross one thing off your list, something new will pop up. You overcome this weakness and God bring up will another area where you can climb higher in. If you don't learn to enjoy yourself where you are, faults and all you will go your whole life feeling wrong on the inside, vague feeling of disapproval.
✝️ Masterpiece In The Making | Joel Osteen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gikxjsYwLq

Oct 15

Trauma is wound that happens inside you. The only thing that an infant can make a mean which is that I'm not lovable and I'm being abandoned and rejected. That wound can show up 70 years later and something touches it. It's not what happens to you, it's what happens inside you. When you touch it, it is very sensitive, that's when you get triggered.
Good thing that you get triggered because it means you can examine yourself.
🟥 Gabor Mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwjZAVrybsA

 

Oct 15

People who develop PTSD in adulthood were people who were traumatized in childhood. And those adult experiences actually trigger the childhood trauma. A lot of people don't recognize it. They keep trying to run away from it. And one way to run away from recognizing it is a problem is that you become addicted. Addiction is manifest of temporary relief but suffers negative consequences and inability to get out. It can be internet, workaholism, sex, shopping...
🟥 Gabor Mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwjZAVrybsa

 

Oct 15

First recognize there's a problem and not run away from it. Secondly, we have to accept compassionately all parts of ourselves, all aspects of ourselves whether we liked them or not. Because all aspects of ourselves whether we like them or not, they came along for a reason. Ask compassionately Why did I do that? What need it was serving? You find the answer. Only when compassion is present, people will love themselves to see the truth. I know you do your best
🟥 Gabor Mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwjZAVrybsa

 

Oct 15

Figuring toxic people (parent, boss). No one is home. Picture security camera on my shoulder. For me it was that joke too far. Or check that with that person. Or are you keeping yourself honest. Scary thing is a lot of people don't have that security camera. They don't have that monitoring system. Our inner child does not know that. It often assumes that difficult people can make better choices, or get it,or be better person. But no one is home to do that
🟥 No one is home
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/WmzAQbVSfHw

Oct 15

Important thing is to get her out of the house. Agoraphobia is funny thing. She'll come out, but she won't take one step pass this end of the walkway here. What we have to do is relax her. Try not to let her hear any bad news. When she sees the world as safe place, she'll come around.
🎞️ Children of The Corn IV: The Gathering

Oct 16

Exiles are original wounds from childhood: sense of unworthiness, being rejected. Two different types of protectors trying to protect these wounded parts getting activated from feeling significant distress. Managers help manage everyday life. Firefighter are extreme protectors, act in extreme way for pain to stop. Just not to feel anything. Befriend them with compassion and gentleness.
🟥 The Childhood Trauma Iceberg: Healing Complex Trauma With IFS Therapy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RM28R_KY0la

 

Oct 16

Self leadership – 8 C: compassion, calm, confidence, clarity, compassion, curiosity, courage, creativity. I'd add playfulness, joy and exploration, laughter, unwounded authentic self. To decrease the activity of wounded parts and how much distress that they cause on regular basis. I protect myself now. Adult part that is present with child parts.
🟥 The Childhood Trauma Iceberg: Healing Complex Trauma With IFS Therapy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RM28R_KY0la

 

Oct 17

Each part—as scary or illuminating or mysterious as it may appear to be—could offer wisdom and solace and vision. I came to see these internal parts as messengers. Dialoguing with them could offer helpful guidance and insight. In doing so, there would emerge clarity, ideas, or answers to seemingly insurmountable, complicated questions about my life.
Foreword by Alanis Morissette, 2021
📖 No Bad Parts, Richard C. Schwartz (2021)

Oct 17

It takes the body 20 minutes to recover from the massive amounts of signals it's getting, to tense up the muscles, perspiring, increased heart rate, slow digestion. Many threats we face today are more symbolic than physical ones. Memory challenges reduce our capacity for emotional regulation. When prefrontal cortex goes offline, emotions are ruling the brain. Emotional stress can trigger amygdala to automatically respond before your frontal lobes.
🟥 Sharon Saline, Psy.D.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AiR9_AB_es

Oct 17

When you tell someone to calm down – there's a Power Dynamic that's implied. “I, partner, am calm and have everything under control, and you, someone with ADHD are whacked”. That will not bode well for productive conversation.
🟥Sharon Saline, PsyD

https://youtu.be/9AiR9_AB_es?si=rP0QwindPilftX8a&t=1018

Oct 17

It all goes down in your mind. Heaven or hell. And whenever we think it's because of the outside, we don't know who we are. So who do I think I am? One minute I think I am this guy who really understands it finally. And the next minute what am I angry about, can't get into taxi? I think I am a child. Being abandoned. And hence the rage of being let down. I don't think that consciously. If I thought it consciously – I'm not actually baby.
🟥 Gabor Maté

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

 

Oct 17

Who I think I am – it's not fixed in stone. It's an ongoing process, flow of beliefs that arise from somewhere and is based on those beliefs that we act or react. As Buddha says, with our thoughts we create the world. But even with our unconscious thoughts we create the world. No amount of affirmations will ever penetrate to the unconscious beliefs. The source is deeper than therapy that address only what person says or thinks. It's not easy to see for self.
🟥 Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

Oct 17

Every time when we have an emotional reaction to something it's worth asking who do I think I am being at this very moment? The concepts that we develop about ourselves, the underlying concepts (not the ones we think and articulate very eloquently about) but the one that actuate and activate how we were being and who we were being. And how we are reacting those dynamics are set early in life. Even in uterus.
🟥 Gabor Maté

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

 

Oct 17

Whenever there is a tension, it need attention. Those are always great times to ask yourself, when you've calmed down a little bit, when you can actually deal with it, actually ask yourself, Who did I think I was when that upset me, when so-and-so called me a name. Who do I think I was when I got upset? How come I didn't see that it's just about them. It's not about me. The only reason I got upset is because what they said reflected something about I believe about myself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

 

Oct 17

 If it didn't you wouldn't be upset. You would just see the other person as having a problem. So every time there is a tension, upset, there is 2 ways asking question why I did something. Why did you do that (with angry voice). It's not a question. It's an accusation. “How could I be so stupid”. People don't respond well when being accused. Even to yourself. In that accusatory tone you'll be hiding from yourself. You'll be in defensive mode. Not in growth mode
🟥 Gabor Maté
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

Oct 17

When somebody has a really good day we tell them be aware. Because tomorrow your ego is going to come up with stuff you haven't even thought of yet. Hearing those voices that attack you, “you will fail anyway”, that's the voice you need to hear in order to heal that self. Self that hates itself is not finished with you yet. It's going to put fight because you're threatening the very existence of identity you made up.
🟥 Gabor Maté +: Diederik Exploring the Depths of Ident.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAVxPAAjVrQ

Oct 17

You can't hate your way into healing.
🟦 Richard Schwartz

Oct 18

All parts are good. They all have naturally valuable talents and resources to lend to us.  But as we go through life and encounter traumas and attachment injuries they shift from their naturally valuable states into roles that sometimes can be quite destructive to us. Not realizing that they were roles that were necessary often in trauma. They get frozen in that time. Think they need to do this for you.
🟥 Dr. Richard Schwartz explains Internal Family Systems (IFS)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdZZ7sTX840

Oct 18

When you assume that part is the burden, it makes sense to go to war against it inside. Assumed that the part was the burden. Parts protect itself. And there is Self. Curious why this part calls me names all day. Curious, calm and confident and even compassionate to something they hated seconds earlier. Had wisdom how to heal both internal and external relationships. Does know how to heal.
🟥 Dr. Richard Schwartz explains Internal Family Systems (IFS)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdZZ7sTX840

Oct 18

Protectors are trying to help the internal system and they have positive intention even if it doesn't look that way. Polarizations are when two protective parts are in conflict with each other. Binge eating part manages emotional distress by overeating and dissociation. Self leadership is the indisputable solution to polarizations. Self is present from birth, it is not considered as part. Self is preserved even during trauma.
🟥 Internal Family Systems And Trauma Explained
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66Rd3hM0C20

 

Oct 18

IFS therapist Frank Anderson believes there's a fixed amount of space within each person and when most of this space is taken up by Protectors and Exiles, there's a limited space for the Self to occupy. He calls this the Container Theory. Systems developed such large protective parts. Self is there but there is not lot of space for it. Process of unburdening – protectors let go of there extreme roles – can become Inner Advisors and Problem Solvers
🟥 Internal Family System
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66Rd3hM0C20

Oct 18

Where are the good people?

Oct 18

Two types of speakers

Oct 19

By and large most survivors of narcissistic and antagonistic relationships over-regulate. You keep it all bottled up. And that will take toll on your physical and mental health. It's not a bad strategy: there's no point in speaking out in the relationship so the over-regulation may be the only way to stay safe. Speaking out may even make things worse. You learn it to push it all down. Feel distanced from what you are allowed to feel.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkCgmeikfBE

Oct 19

Person who is healthfully regulated – you actually express the emotion appropriately. You give yourself the permission to identify the emotion and to respond to it. Cry if sad. Take a break. Laughing, Articulate emotion, what you need. It doesn't mean other person will co-operate. You name it, express it, process it - appropriately. You recognize your emotion is yours, owning it. Not shove your emotion to other throat (how you are not sad).
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkCgmeikfBE

Oct 19

We don't turn off our feelings, but we also cannot expect the world to stop for our feelings. We can't just spew our feelings all over the place whenever we want. Allow you to stop before your react. Account for idea that there are two experiences. Knowing we are not the center of universe. It means your feelings are valid but to take perspective, to remain angry and knowing not everyone else has your experience.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkCgmeikfBE

Oct 19

Not expressing your feelings is not regulation. That is common myth. We often praise people for being stoic, toughing it up. I see that – psychological time bomb in terms of physical illness, self blame, anxiety. Keeping it all in is indoctrination of the narc relationship: that your emotions are not valid so you smoosh them down. Allow yourself inside to call it anger rather than “I can be strong and stoic”.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkCgmeikfBE

Oct 19

The worst you can have is empathy for Psychopaths"

Oct 19

Only thing I do with people as a psychopath – if I'm in a room with people, the only thing I care about is being worshiped by people and winning people over. Or attracting a mate physically so I could sleep with her. That's it. That's all I care about. I care about being the most popular person in the room, I care about being worshiped by everyone, I do not care about anybody, I don't have empathy towards anybody.
🟥 Being a Psychopath, a Narcissist, and healing with ifs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCvIzhu3s-0

 

Oct 19

Trouvere Medieval Minstrels - Trecento (short version)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NW8fmXWu_m

 

Oct 19

You need to completely rework your life – if your life is going to be a moral one. Supererogatory action is extra thing you did, you did not have to do it and good, it was not obligatory. Obligatory – you have to do it. The possibility of not spending money on luxuries does not occur to most people. We think giving money is extra thing. If you don't give to charity, famine relief - You've done something wrong, it's not justifiable
🟥 Peter Singer - ordinary people are evil
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVl5kMXz1vA

 Oct 19

Conclusion of this paper is that most people are doing something bad every day. And you don't even realize it. A great distance prevented people from knowing about very bad things. Several hundreds years ago you could not know what is bad happening on the other side of world. Now proximity is irrelevant because of officiant form of communication. The presence of others is only relevant if those other people are gonna do something.
🟥 Peter Singer - ordinary people are evil
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVl5kMXz1vA

Oct 20

You don't buy a friend. You earn a friend. With love and trust. You love a friend. You don't order your friends around. You have a friend, you ask your friend.
🎞️ The Toy (1982)

Oct 20

If you love him and need him, you have to tell him so.
🎞️ The Toy (1982)

Oct 21

Are you in a culture that doesn't allow second chances?
Don't be defined by any of those hogwash cultural ideas, even though you love your country. You always have a second chance. As many as you need. God wants you to be right because it's the best life you can have, you will be so fulfilled.
There will be lot of failures before success.
✝️ HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5248QfwTM8

Oct 21

We were on those tedious field trips when we saw this sign by the side of a road.
- Sign? What sign?
- This sign.
🎞️ A Carol Burnett Double Feature - "Mildred Fierce" and "Torchy Song"

Oct 22

" In the southern Italian region of Molise exist 3 towns which were historically settled by Croats in the 1500's. 500 years later, Croats still inhabit these picturesque Italian towns and apparently speak a variety of the Croatian language to this day."
🟥 Nobody understands this language
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMSj_HdGBT4

Oct 22

 While you are waiting – do your part. Keep believing, keep expecting.
What God put in your heart is in transit. It's headed your direction, it's just a matter of time before it shows up.
✝️ JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgRdIbO9Mkg

Oct 22

Curracloe Beach
The strand doubled for Omaha Beach in the famous D-Day opening scenes of the movie Saving Private Ryan (1998).
📖 Lonely Planet; Davenport, Fionn; Harper, Damian; Le Nevez, Catherine; Ver Berkmoes, Ryan; Wilson, Neil. Lonely Planet Ireland (Travel Guide) . Lonely Planet Global Limited. Kindle Edition.

 

Oct 22

Heather Plett on trauma

Oct 23

Over time, these interactions (subtle criticism, backhanded compliments, passive-aggressive) can make a person question their self-worth and become apprehensive in social situations.
🟥 How Does a Covert Narcissist Trigger My Social Anxiety?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Di7-kTqHx1A

Oct 23

Narcissists often manipulate interpersonal dynamics to maintain control, inadvertently causing social anxiety in their partners.
🟥 How Do Narcissists Trigger My Social Anxiety?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdR6fNv7l8A

Oct 23

"never trust a man with zero art on his wall 🗿"

Oct 23

Stop holding people to contracts they didn't consent to.
🟦 Matthias J Barker

Oct 23

Are men the property of the state, or are they free souls under god? This same battle continues throughout the world today.
And man was given dominion over all things upon this earth, and the power to choose between good and evil. He knew not the light of god's law. Man took dominion over man.
The conquered were made to serve the conqueror.
The weak were made to serve the strong.
🎞️ The Ten Commandments (1956)

Oct 24

There is no freedom without the law.
🎞️ The Ten Commandments (1956)

Oct 25

People will say I'm an empath, I like to be giving. Being giving is fine – if you are giving from a place where you're a whole, healed, healthy adult. If you're giving or submitting or fawning from a place of fear and anxiety and guilt and shame if you don't serve, that ain't healthy. Saying you're spiritual is nonsense. The only place where you can give from is place where you have something.
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDTWsz-0ruU

 Oct 25

Communication traps:
- lacking empathy
- name calling (Ad Hominem)
- personal attacks
- contempt
- disappearing
- arguing perspective
- lack of accountability
- stonewalling
- win vs. lose
- criticism
- defensiveness

Oct 25

Examples of verbal abuse:
- name-calling
- guilt trips
- gaslighting
- criticism
- threats
- blaming
- manipulation
- humiliation
- spreading lies
- minimizing someone's experiences of feelings
- screaming

Oct 25

Traits of creative person

Oct 26

Memories are a very powerful pathway to our body and ourselves.
There are no bad parts. We are born with them and they are forced out of their naturally valuable states into extreme roles by trauma and bad parenting, attachment injuries. Once they are relieved of burden they will transform into their natural states, what they were designed to be.
For me, it is not body that keeps the score. It's parts
🟥 ‘Trauma and Addiction: Internal Family Systems’ with Richard Schwartz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHj4GcBDiZs

 

Oct 26

For me, it is not body that keeps the score. It is parts that keep score, parts adapt and affect the body.
Issue for me what I learned the hard way is prescriptions about trying to calm your body, they are often parts that don't want that. They'll fight back. If you start with those parts and get them on board, then you can much easily calm the body.
Those parts learned to adapt it is not safe to connect with whole Self.
🟥 ‘Trauma and Addiction: Internal Family Systems’
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHj4GcBDiZs

Oct 26

The organism knows how to heal if you give it what it needs – it knows the right next step forward. People sort of know how to heal themselves. Inner self helper. If you get those parts out of the way, it emerges. Make sure Self is present: Are you ok doing this, going in there, know if you feel the connection.
Most system try to fight inner critic and that is huge mistake. How you feel toward it. Give space to know it.
🟥 ‘Trauma and Addiction: Internal Family Systems’
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHj4GcBDiZs

Oct 26

I think your behavior is masking some deeper turmoil.
🎞️ Best of Jack & Karen at Café Jacques | Will & Grace
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMz1dlw-t-

Oct 27

I'm really happy you're doing what works best for you.
We don't have to engage. He is an abuser. That was abusive what he did. I don't have to buy into it. I let them be abusive. They're doing the best the can. That is how you handle stranger's anger.
I just see a 4 year old child who's hurting who don't get me.
How To Set Boundaries Politely
🟥 Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSg-HM2M6As

 

Oct 27

When your partner screams and yells at you: first ask for space. If they continue – this does not work for me. Words inside of me I get them to feel personal and feel attacked by it so I leave. We don't stand in front of abuse ever. The only time we get abused is when we allow it. I don't tolerate it. You don't get near with me anymore. We are not taught correctly and that's how people like me get abused.
🟥 Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSg-HM2M6As

 Oct 27

You won't find beige in narcissism world. Grandiosity means detail, it means evoking envy from other people. It means telling the story that is better than reality. It means larger than life. Trauma bonded relationship often start from the place of excitement, of feeling special, relationship that “nobody ever has ever experienced”, a fairy tale, epic.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13GAqjlqnOA

 Oct 27

Radical acceptance – you see and and you get it. Then slowly some other things may lift, too. The self blame: no, there was no other way I could have said it. No, there was nothing more that I could have done. Some of the self doubt may lift: “It may not be the right answer but I feel more comfortable doing this way”. Rumination may circle back into solution.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eG6w9zmBcA

Oct 27

Find beauty in mistakes

Oct 27

And this is how you see man... - noble, beautiful, unafraid?
- How else should I see him?
- As he is... corrupt and evil... Your painting is beautiful, but false.
- Well, I thought my idea for the panel... was that man's evil he learned from himself...not from God. I wanted to paint man as he was first created... innocent, still free of sin grateful for the... the gift of life.
🎞️ The Agony and the Ecstasy (1965)

Oct 28

Shame is one of the most painful emotions that humans can experience. And so it's not surprising that people want to get away from shame. Some people lean to do that through grandiosity.
There's the pain of always being hypervigilant. There's the pain and the pressure of always having to be on top, always having to be the best. In therapy, bring this pain connected to grandiosity into the office.
🟦 Christine Padesky, PhD

Oct 28

Even in total catastrophe, even in a situation where everybody's life at risk, it's the person with the peaceful mind that is able to lead and bring everyone to safety. Bandwidth principle: my mind can only handle so much. In order to change your thoughts, you got to create some bandwidth. You got to create some space.
✝️ HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkGu8w9xnSA

Oct 28

Positive mindset will open up all sorts of opportunities you had no idea were there. You're going to see solution all of the sudden, because of those opportunities. You're going to attract solution oriented people into your life. More importantly you'll see people you can't help. There are people in your life you can't help. You'll say I love but I can't help this person. That clarity will open tons of bandwidth, changing your mindset.
✝️ HOUR OF POWER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkGu8w9xnSA

Oct 28

🎞️ Creepshow (1982)

Oct 29

CNN hasn't yet updated its clocks. It is 6:37 CET daylight savings time.

Oct 30

If they have early signs of aggression, if they are controlling early on, if they're agitated by you, if they have anger issues, these are clear signs early on that they are not the person you want to get involved with in your life. Recognize the signs early and then close that door as soon as you can and walk away.
🟥 Removing toxic people from your life can improve your mental and emotional well-being
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vw-px7i_-Sc

Oct 30

What if you're in a situation with co-worker and you can't get away.
- I would say set clear boundaries. Be professional but also assertive, be firm, but do it in polite way. Let them know you will tolerate them on professional level but anything beyond that let them know you won't tolerate their behavior.
🟥 Removing toxic people from your life can improve your mental and emotional well-being
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vw-px7i_-Sc

Oct 30

We are not designed to stay in heightened state of threat. We are not designed to live our lives feeling threatened all the time.
📣 Lisa Romano
https://www.spreaker.com/user/lisaaromanol

Oct 30

A system with an unchecked reinforcing feedback loop ultimately will destroy itself.
🟦 Donella Meadows

Oct 31

Narcissistic relationships push us to be perfectionistic robots. The idea that maybe there is a point of enough where we'll get it right and they'll be okay with us and then we can breathe. That moment doesn't exist and there is no such thing as perfect. And we are not robots. We are people after years in narcissistic relationship who need to be kind to ourselves.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KakiBS9je4o

Oct 31

Pronoia - the irrational belief that people like you.
Pronoia is the positive counterpart of paranoia.

Oct 31

Once you can get narcissist out of your life, and out of your mind, all of that new time and mental space that you can now open up means you've now got the bandwidth to do amazing things and many people do once they are set free. Years that they wasted in narc relationship. If it was your narc parents – it shaped who you are, then go through shame, grief and guilt and endless work of getting their invalidating voices out of your head.
🟥 YT DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KakiBS9je4o

Oct 31

You may have been gaslighted so many times that you began to doubt if you were sane, let alone competent. It's the rumination part that is so awful. The amount of time you spend thinking about the terrible things they say. You're shock at how un-empathic they are. Your confusion in wake of so much gaslighting and manipulation. You wonder and caught in cognitive dissonance and lose more your mental bandwidth to rumination.
🟥 DoctorRamani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KakiBS9je4o

Oct 31

And I think its weird, but I don't make fun of you.
- Do you hear yourself? Okay, pointing out people's differences and saying that they're weird IS making fun of them.
- Whoa.
- Did you, like, really not know that?
- No. I thought I was just making conversation. I've got so many people to apologize to.
🎞️ Hocus Pocus 2 (2022)

💾