May 2023 Twitter

 May 1, 2023

Violence arises not out of superfluity of power but out of powerlessness.
Rollo May

 May 1

Using case studies R. D.  Laing argued that psychosis is not a medical condition, but an outcome  of the 'divided self', or the tension between the two personas within  us: one our authentic, private identity, and the other the false, 'sane'  self that we present to the world.

 

May 1

Fair selection & the same exam.

May 1

Once in an institution individuals become institutionalized and their individual identities go through a process of mortification (they die out), leaving only the characteristics of the label behind.

May 1

Without arousal or attribution we will not experience any emotion.

 

May 1

Our interactions with others, and with society at large, help us to construct our selves.

May 1
Good Will Hunting (1997) - "It's not your fault" scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aS7RO9Vhiac

 May 2
People pleasing as a child is a really intelligent survival choice because it keeps you out of danger and it provides you with some love. But once you become an adult the people pleasing patterns start to feel limiting.
🟥The Workout Witch
https://youtube.com/watch?v=lCf_ZuHodm4

May 2
We need to form bonds with other people and this means to submit to some  level, to some extent to their standards, wants and needs and  observations.
I believe what we do in this negotiation process is crucial in forming healthy bonds with other people.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
 

May 2
All this money and adventure - and there is only one crappy photo from space - showing mostly nothing. This is why scientist need artistic people too in their missions.
"Japan's Ispace Loses Contact With Lander Targeting Moon"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AYCOIShnrWA

 

May 2
The Looking Glass Self

May 2
Ask the question: "Who is defining the situation?"

May 2
Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.
Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.
Marcus Aurelius

May 2
The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.
Marcus Aurelius

May 2
...and if it is humanly possible, consider it to be within your reach.

May 3
Drugs damage the brain.

May 3
Considered, along with Haskell Wexler's Medium Cool (1969), to be amongst the first mainstream movies to feature male frontal nudity.
This has never shown on non-cable American television. But has been shown on TCM after 1:00 a.m.
IMDb trivia
Women in Love (1969)

May 4
INFJs are helping others solve their problems. We're acting towards them in a way, I think you're special and I see you. And of course, this attracts narcissists. Narcissists by default need you to admire them.
🟥Wenzes
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bfodfPAUl38
 

 

May 4
Nothing you do cannot wing in these relationships, that nothing can ever make a difference. Even if you figure out the workarounds, and you're perfect 100 times, that one time becomes eraser for the rest of it.
🟥DoctorRamani
http://youtube.com/watch?v=0PeJ-ZMrQyI
 

May 4
We internalize their voices. When we hear the barriers they set for us, for a long enough time, their lack of faith, their criticism and fear, we take it in and make their voices our own. We clip our own wings.
🟥DoctorRamani
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2YhdNGUXvV8

May 4
LIFE magazine
October 3, 1966
Wearing goggles, Richard Aldcroft gazes into his light projector and sees hallucinatory patterns.

May 4
May colours

 

 

May 5
Narcs split from themselves. Their true self and create false identity. And narcissists cause victims to do the same, people pleasing personality. It is important in recovery to reconnect with your inner child to be complete person.
🟥NarcFreeLivingLLC
https://youtube.com/shorts/JYYpRgQsqtc
 

May 5
If you were fortunate enough to have parents who hit all milestones for you: made you feel safe, made you feel worthy, made you feel nurtured, didn't make you worse when you made mistake then chances are you get wonderful life.
🟥Lisa Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RJQnhqXGk28
 

May 5
For those who experiences childhood emotional neglect, our amygdala-fight or flight system- is larger than those who came from homes more balances. Our hippocampal volume oftentimes is smaller: our memory gets affected. Unable to quick recall
🟥Lisa Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RJQnhqXGk28
 

May 5
Trying to hinder someone's freedom costs your own. When you try to help them, it drags you down. Best you can do you can be example – they look at you so they can lift their own situation.
🟥TrevoyLenear24
https://youtube.com/shorts/taPVZoqFa1k

May 5
Stop fixing themselves and learn how to love themselves so that they start to create things in life that they enjoy. Codependency comes from history of terror, things not being safe, reliable. To have sense of safety, relief.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

May 5
In my work we don't eliminate codependency. What we do is add options to our skill set. Because codependency in my work is strategy. It's not a condition. It's made of peoplepleasing, perfectionism, fixing others&self, protect people from their own choices
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY

May 5
First gauge our capacity in our sense of safety. What am I feeling where I am at. Then 2, look at reality. Am I dealing with someone that has an established pattern, an established history of being aggressive, neglectful when I say no?
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY

May 5
Acknowledge this is scary to say No right now. I'm not supposed to feel not scared. Because we usually do that; “We're suppose to be strong” Right now it is. I have history of not allowed to say No. Legitimize this feeling,raises safety
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

May 5
Curiosity is opposite of perfectionism. When we can separate our worth from outcomes then perfectionism collapses on itself. It becomes cry for safety. Extract our sense of worth from conditions; must exist prior before occurring.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

May 5
Curiosity is opposite of perfectionism. When we can separate our worth from outcomes then perfectionism collapses on itself. It becomes cry for safety. Extract our sense of worth from conditions, must prior before occurring.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

 

May 5
The word Perfectionism there is attachment to that word. We develop weird identity around it. Then it's hard to change. We move from identity to experience. Move from I am to I experienced. Disidentify, so go back to being ourselves.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY

May 5
Acknowledge we are giving a lot of tolerance, “they had a bad day”, “they've got trauma in their past”, there are millions of excuses for those who are emotionally immature to justify their behaviours.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

May 5
Legitimize the pain. When pain becomes real and valid to me then I can say No quicker. This doesn't feel good to me, can we do this instead. Then communicate “Nope, this is going to happen” rather than “Stop”.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY
 

May 5
Narcissistic abuse systems introduce doubt into your worth and perception so that they can control you. This legitimacy is counteraction against that. We start to heal the impact of gaslighting, shaming. My experiences valued by me.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY

May 5
People who deal with codependency, they don't feel real. They don't feel like they exist. They only feel they exist if in relationship or if someone sees them. They don't feel their emotions are legitimate unless someone says so.
🟥Marshall Burtcher
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NpLVvJzyDhY

May 5
Toxic behaviours are any behaviours that cause others or you to feel unsafe or powerless. To make you feel like you need to defend yourself. They run counter to secure attachment. Secure attachment are responsive, try to help you.
🟥Doc Snipes
https://youtube.com/watch?v=O8cEy7uP5Qw
 

May 5
You may have made a mistake, you may have done something wrong, but that's a behaviour. That's an event. That's not who you are. So when you're Global: you lump behaviour in with person's lovability, that becomes shame.
🟥Doc Snipes
https://youtube.com/watch?v=O8cEy7uP5Qw

May 5
You can choose to end relationship. Or you can choose pity and compassion over anger. When people are acting in toxic ways, recognizing how dark and scary it must be inside their head. Don't feed the trolls, don't respond nasty for nasty.
🟥Doc Snipes
https://youtube.com/watch?v=O8cEy7uP5Qw
 

May 5
Remember all communication with narc is an opportunity to abuse and exploit. If you can reduce contact. Text less words. Don't engage. Abandon sincere communication when you're with the insincere. Don't give authentic emotional response.
🟥RICHARD GRANNON
https://youtube.com/watch?v=77-HD59t4U4
 

May 5
Don't give then any real information. Gray rock, no contact is the best. Be so dull, boring, on mission whatever you need from them. Your emotional pain, your emotional reactions are the oxygen that they feed from. Keep it bland, reduce.
🟥RICHARD GRANNON
https://youtube.com/watch?v=77-HD59t4U4
 

May 5
Women in Love (1969) along with Haskell Wexler's Medium Cool (1969), considered to be amongst the first mainstream movies to feature male frontal nudity.
IMDb trivia
Medium Cool (1969)

May 6
The Hangman
Publication date: Spring 1942 – Fall 1943

May 6
Disqualifying yourself almost always comes from a place of fear or dread. That feeling of fear or dread always manifests itself as tired. "I just can't." That's what fear does when we confront something. Just do it, just try.
✝️HOUR OF POWER
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_BA9jbVXLBY

 

May 6
Matthew effect:
"the rich get richer and the poor get poorer".
- the tendency of individuals to accrue social or economic success in proportion to their initial level of popularity, friends, wealth, etc.

May 6
Think with relaxed mind. When you have a fearful mind, you're spinning wheels, really afraid, what happens you become tired. Or think with hurry mind, you become clumsy, you start messing things up, ends up taking up much longer ironically.
✝️HOUR OF POWER
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_BA9jbVXLBY
 

May 6
The Outer Limits ( 1963-65 ) S01E14
The Zanti Misfits
https://dailymotion.com/video/x87a6zm
 

May 6

Carol Burnett and Cher imitating each other in 1975.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GoOzAynmXRo
 

May 7

Movie poster for "Far from Moscow" (1950).

May 7

The first Soviet horror film based on the novel of the same name by Nikolai Gogol.
Viy (1967)

May 7

If the situation is not changing, maybe God is using situation to change you. Don't just go through it; upset, bitter, offended – grow through it. That's an opportunity to build your spiritual muscles. That is test, are you gonna get upset or be your best?
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ra1k3eRdkik
 

May 7

It's easy to be rude to people who are rude to you. But what if you knew all that was a test? That it wasn't random, it was strategic  - that God put you there to see how would you respond. Don't let the same thing upset you. Grow through it.
✝️JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ra1k3eRdkik
 

May 7

Disney originally wanted to rent the Dykstraflex camera system, created for Star Wars (1977). The price and rental terms were unacceptable, so Disney created its own version. The result was radically superior to the Dykstraflex system. IMDB trivia
🎞️The Black Hole (1979)

May 7
It's about the limits of human knowledge. After all, by imposing artificial limits we are dealing a blow to the concept of infinite knowledge. If our movement is not forward, don't we risk moving backward?
🎞️Solaris (1972)

May 7
You saw the materalization of your conception of her. What if you had seen something you never knew, something out of the recesses of your soul? What if all this is a long-awaited contact?
🎞️Solaris (1972)

May 8
You consider your so-called Visitors, is this what you call us? - as something extraneous and irritating. But they are part of you, your conscience.
🎞️Solaris (1972)

May 8
Snaut, why are we being tortured that way?
- I think it's because we've lost sense of the cosmic. Ancient man had no such problem. He'd have never questioned the Cosmos: Why? What for? Remember the myth of Sisyphus?
🎞️Solaris (1972)

May 8
For many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes.
Pareto Principle

May 8
When a tree grows, it is soft and flexible. But when it is dry and hard, it dies. Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life. That which has become hard will not triumph.
Stalker (1979)

May 8
All my life I've been scared. Even of you. You don't scare me any more.
🎞️ Stalker (1979)

May 9
The film's mysterious Zone has drawn comparisons with the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone. Though the film does not specify the origin of the Zone, near the end, in a shot of the Stalker with his family outside the Zone, what appears to be a power plant is visible in the background
wiki

May 9
Being obsessive or indecisive or neurotic about decisions is a strategy to control the outcomes and control those consequences about our decisions. Not deciding keeps us safe.
🟥Patrick Teahan LICSW

May 9
That narrative that came from her parents was so strong: that if you are going to do something for yourself that others will suffer greatly. That's her unconscious that's driving this stuff.
🟥Patrick Teahan LICSW
https://youtube.com/watch?v=WMXseugY23w
 

 

May 9
Good security as goal in good psychotherapy is the ability to be ok no matter what comes up in our lives. Through good or bad times. True security means to be able to roll with decisions instead of seeing life as one false move as forever.
🟥Patrick Teahan
https://youtube.com/watch?v=WMXseugY23w
 

 

May 9
First Semi-Final
 #Eurovision2023

May 9
Sweden will win #Eurovision2023
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RZFoFiasrE0
 

 

May 10
To torture a man you have to know his pleasures.
🇵🇱 Stanisław Lem

May 10

Toxic shame - Early on in life something broke your will. Your will is a part of your conscious mind that believes that you are inherently deserving of love, care, protection, comfort, respect – all that human being is inherently worthy of.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

To compensate for feeling worthless: the ways we show up in the world as either “more than” or “less than” human. To develop false person more than human is to balance out toxic shame with grandiose beliefs about self. "Evil is others fault"
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

“I am inherently better than other people, I am cooler, smarter, funnier, have more money, better looking” can also be a grandiose thought. These are ways of making ourselves more than human believing in some objective way better than else.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

Or we can adopt identity that is less than human. Believing because I am so bad flawed at my core. Neither view of self is accurate. At all of our cores we are all inherently lovable, worthwhile human. Trauma internalized something untrue.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug

 

May 10

We are always aware of the fact that we must keep our true Self hidden when we are around other people. Because we are governed by this feeling of being contaminated in some way. To compensate we learn to be defensive, a little bit guarded.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug

May 10

 Muster up energy to bring False Selves to the occasion. It doesn't occur to us when shame bound that and act authentic. If acting authentic, someone might see our inner contamination. So it takes tons of energy to engage in social situation.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug

May 10

To shame bound person the only way to relax and to be authentic is to be alone where there's no one around to catch you being your actual Self. Everybody has this to small extent. Who they are and social Persona are radically different.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

It's not like going to party and put Fake Self. It's more like you frantically trying to find a way to self-regulate with the view of yourself as a competent, worthwhile “ok” person. Through getting validation, achieving externally, accepted
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

3rd sign of shame bound identity: avoid psychological mirrors. By not showing yourself to others in authentic way - you avoid True Self being mirrored back to you by anybody. We find psychological mirrors inside intimate relationships.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug

May 10

When you are shame bound you are terrified of spontaneous feelings arising in the body. Because you believe that your feeling are shameful and so you only allow yourself to feel things you have pre-decided you will feel. Fake persona you present to them.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

This is not something anybody would consciously choose. You didn't choose to disconnect from feelings, over rely on logic or fantasy. This is the way you adapted based on the way you were raised. You learned to orchestrate your life such way
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug

 

May 10

Anything we use as a replacement for having a secure base inside of ourselves or other people counts as an addiction. If we feel as we need it in order to regulate self. There are myriad things we can get addicted to that are not substances.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

The end goal of healing from shame is exposing your true self to the world. Getting in touch with who you actually are at your core, understanding that there is nothing wrong, shameful or bad about it. Existing as authentic self in the world
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

 

May 10

Once we become aware and consciously accept the fact that we've been operating from a place of toxic shame and that shame is not our true identity,task is getting to know who our true Self is.Figure who we are not, dismantle negative beliefs
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug
 

May 10

You see Europe, some of us Brits do bother to learn another language.
🟥#Eurovision Song Contest 2023 - First Semi-Final | Full Show | Live Stream | Liverpool
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RZFoFiasrE0
 

 

May 10

Croatia at #Eurovision2023
Eurovision Song Contest 2023 - First Semi-Final
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RZFoFiasrE0&t=2422s

 

 

May 10

Sweden at #Eurovision2023
Eurovision Song Contest 2023 - First Semi-Final
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RZFoFiasrE0&t=3545s

 

 

May 11
Often appreciation we have is not actually tied with anything in reality. The appreciation we feel inside our minds is often tied to something we imagined them doing based on something we extrapolate from reality.
🟥Heidi Priebe
Limerence
https://youtube.com/watch?v=9l5ALCPEBkc

May 11
We have to be very careful that we are not telling ourselves any story about what they did. We are so trained to attach motives to people's behaviors that it is almost impossible at first to root out what actually happened vs what we believe
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=9l5ALCPEBkc

May 11
"I appreciate you supported me" - these are interpretations. For all I know they were manipulating me, using to get something. It is inaccurate to assume anything about what is going on in someone's inner world. Appreciate for concrete things that really happened.
🟥Heidi Priebe

May 11
You might be looking at narcissism through a very different lens than someone who has more secure patterning would look at it. Realize large part of what might keeping you stuck might be your own attachment system.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
Anxiously attached: there is negative view of self, positive view of others. Susceptible to what narcissist is telling them during love bombing phase. Tend to self regulate through fantasy. Fantasy of being seen and chosen. It feels high.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
Someone with Secure attachment style operates with the world view: I'm ok, you're ok. Comfortable with getting to know someone slowly, in process to get know someone in honest and authentic way. Love bombing will feel insincere,non-authentic
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
Those with more anxious patterning get caught up in trying to learn everything about narcissism, getting obsessed – preoccupied style. We believe the answer to way we feel internally lies other there in the world. This is not how it works.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

 May 11
“If we can only crack the Code then the way we feel inside will change”. This is not how it works. How you feel is how you feel. Spending time ruminating, obsessing over every little thing narcissist did keeps you stuck in drama triangle.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
Almost like you try to find solution that will allow you to un-feel the pain. But there is no unfeeling pain. If you have pain in you – it needs to get processed, metabolized, and only then you will be able to truly move on.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

 May 11
It's almost like if they can prove to themselves that this other person was the one who was actually wrong, bad, evil or corrupt, then they can tell themselves well the problem is not in me – I must be worthy, lovable: You stay as victim.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
The same way I would not ask a friend with a severe physical disability to help me with predominately physical –I would not ask someone with a severe emotional disturbance to be the person who respond securely to me. Won't become preoccupied
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G5EIUFsQ758

May 11
Overcompensating:
- will not make someone love you more
- lead to burnout
- attracts the wrong people
- causes you to focus more on others than on yourself

 May 11
Our persona was not created by accident; it was created in order to camouflage the parts of ourselves we deemed the most undesirable and to overcompensate for what we believe to be our deepest flaws.
Debbie Ford

May 11
avoiding your pain is driving you to overcompensate

May 11
A lot of people say I seem masculine, but I don't feel it. Maybe my masculine qualities come from overcompensating because I'm not the one of the boys.
Tom Hardy

May 11
No matter how good you treat people, they'll not treat you the same.

May 12
Early news journal from Russia on May 12th, 2023 looks like this:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=0AKQrkwBo0o
 

May 12
"Normal people understand them and support them, while these other ones are spitting on them and hate them out of pure spite and frustrations."
Shame Culture country - example from Croatia
https://24sata.hr/news/moj-brat-u-zambiji-prolazi-kroz-pakao-izgubio-je-20-kila-samo-zele-doci-doma-sa-djetetom-909683
 

May 12
Kerrang! covers

 

 May 12
If you read an article like this, it's easy for survivors to feel that “they haven't been doing it right”, that they aren't being face forward enough or kind enough. Ultimately they shame survivors, they don't frame any of this within narc abuse
🟥DrRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=etA7Hx8J5U0

May 12
BBC and Eurovision giving nod to Zagreb hosting ESC in 1990.
Helga Vlahovic and Oliver Mlakar, legendary TV presenters from ex-Yugoslavia;
https://youtube.com/live/IsJVZ1MGjDc?feature=share&t=3532

 

May 12
Your life will be transformed when you make peace with your shadow. The caterpillar will become a breathtakingly beautiful butterfly. You will no longer have to pretend to be someone you're not.
Debbie Ford

May 12
what you don't own, owns you.
Debbie Ford

May 12
Our society nurtures the illusion that the rewards go to the people who are perfect. But many of us are finding out that trying to be perfect is costly.
Debbie Ford

May 12
Sometimes when you experience something grotesque and horrifying your brain works to repress it.
🎞️Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man - episode 20

May 13
Under compensation may cause inferiority complex

May 13
⬜️BBC: City of London Police to screen suspects for undiagnosed ADHD.
"In 2021, Dame Sally Coates’ report for the prison watchdog HMIP suggested at least 50% of prisoners could have some form of neurodivergence."
https://bbc.com/news/articles/cxrdgyq6lveo

May 13
It has something to do with how they viewed the experience. Someone who's succeeding says I've been shot at, been in crush - if I can handle that I can handle whatever in business. But a guy in street says I can't handle that.
✝️Hour of Power
https://youtube.com/watch?v=5s1KV2WW4Qk
 

 May 13
How we experience those things make us different. So much how you perceive your life & your past dictates your future. Not what happened to you but how you perceive what happened to you. Don't say I'm terrible person, people need better you
✝️Hour of Power
https://youtube.com/watch?v=5s1KV2WW4Qk

 

May 13
Showing no emotion, my feelings locked inside
I made myself an island, trying to take my heart and hide
I built a wall around me, afraid of letting go
But suddenly an open door I never saw before
Niamh Kavanagh - In Your Eyes (1993)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=9RGzCbczukM
 

 May 13
Falling out of a perfect dream, coming out of the blue
(Is it true?)
(Did I dream it?)
Will I wake from this pain?
Yohanna - Is It True (2009)
#Eurovision
https://youtube.com/watch?v=qqE69feyEOU

 

May 13
How to beat limerence?
Let them go.

May 13
Diodato performing "Fai Rumore" inside empty Arena di Verona during 2020 pandemic.
#Eurovision2023 #Eurosong
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Ogyi0GPR_Ik
 

 

 May 13
There's a saying I like;
People may forget what you said, they may forget what you did. But they'll never forget the way you made them feel.
🟥Celebrating Carol: The Gift of Laughter
https://youtube.com/watch?v=6uCD1ay7KlM

May 13
Go with peace and leave me alone in my battle.
- Battle?
- Innocent you, who don't know it yet.
🎞️Simon of the Desert (1965)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ZOQVwbD5o2M

 May 13
Change yourself.
- Change myself, Sir?
- Step down from that column. Return back to the world. Rejoice in pleasure until you get nauseous. Only then your satisfied body will free your spirit. Then truly you will be standing beside me.
🎞️Simon of the Desert (1965)

May 14
La Zarra explained her hand gesture:"You need to understand my French generational custom, and it is not a negative gesture. It is the gesture of disappointment which we commonly use among friends. I'm aware my gesture can be considered as something else by people outside France"

 May 14
You need to take responsibility for your growth. Growth is not automatic. What steps are you taking to get better? Don't just coast through life, relying off what you've already learned. You have treasure on the inside. Skill, talent put in u
✝️JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=dpeZv6wE0IA

 

 May 14
Sherrell, who’s been working at the Vons, says he is on the autism spectrum.
“My biggest problem, what I have is that I’m mildly autistic, I have a hard time processing things,”
📰California grocery clerk fired after being assaulted three times
https://nypost.com/2023/05/12/california-vons-grocery-clerk-fired-after-being-assaulted-three-times/

May 14
Pete Walker calls it Abandonment Depression. Which is basically idea that the reason we form all of these defenses, insecure attachment strategies, mental illnesses, all neurosis that develop in our psyche keep us from pain that's underneath
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc
 

May 14
It might feel like “Oh no, I am feeling pain all the time”. Healing is not linear. At this point I'm realizing when we heal ourselves we feel way more pain than we leave ourselves unhealed. That pain was preferable than actual one underneath
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

May 14
Healing means actually feeling the stuff underneath. John Bowlby's concept of defense exclusion; When a human psyche is unable to tolerate a certain concept, we exclude it from further processing. As if some information is poison to psyche.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

 

May 14
Anything that threatens your safety particularly as it relates to your caregivers, your brain as a child is going to try to shield you from realizing. When we defensively exclude information from further processing that leaves us with some holes in our reasoning.
🟥Heidi Priebe

May 14
So we have to come up with different ways of explaining why things are happening the way they are, that end up becoming kind of defense mechanisms in our psyches that we use to comfort ourselves with. We begin to form Attachment styles.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

 

May 14
Unable to integrate information that parent is mentally ill you decide your parent's extreme mood swings are in some way your fault, and you are bad, corrupt in some way, and if only you try harder, do better, care-then parent would feel ok.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc
 

 May 14
It's easier for you to come up with this delusion that you are somehow capable of controlling someone else's moods. These inaccurate world views, inaccurate beliefs we form about ourselves, they follow us through our entire life.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

May 14
We don't realize as adults that we are now capable of meeting our needs so we don't need these advanced strategies for keeping people close. Pink cloud: We want all things that go well in our life to continue and new things on top of that.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc
 

May 14
Your body knows when it's safe to kind of fall apart a little bit and when it's not safe to do that. Where we start with is defense exclusion where our body and mind are protecting us from information we don't want to know. See life as it is
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc
 

 

May 14
Earning security is about learning a complete new set of skills. Neither anxious (finding ways to be activated) or avoidant (put to sleep, deactivated). It's about being really present and really in tune with reality, what is, people around.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

May 14
Pain being real makes it surmountable. Problem with being insecurely attached is that most your problems are insurmountable because a lot of them are what you're inventing; Being mad at person for not living up to your ideal you've invented.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc

May 14
That problem has no solution because you're not living in reality. Or if avoidant, you try solve the way you're feeling through some sort of neurotic rule you've created, standard you set like I'll love myself once I meet this standard.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vNw6fjaJJUc
 

May 14
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” -- Rumi

May 15
The asks became daily reminders. She accepted these as quirks in his character, even when they began to multiply and seep into other areas of their daily routine.
📰Coercive control: ‘It creeps up on you slowly and quickly at the same time’
https://irishtimes.com/opinion/2023/05/15/coercive-control-it-creeps-up-on-you-slowly-and-quickly-at-the-same-time/
 

May 15
By the time the victim realises that they are self-censoring, self-checking and making daily choices to avoid breaking the rules of this language and facing the unavoidable consequences, they are probably so far into a cycle of abuse
📰Coercive Control
https://irishtimes.com/opinion/2023/05/15/coercive-control-it-creeps-up-on-you-slowly-and-quickly-at-the-same-time/
 

 

May 15
All couples nag each other. We all have our individual idiosyncrasies and foibles.
In these contexts, it is only natural to occasionally accept a partner’s quirks.
Coercive control is fundamentally different
📰Coercive control
https://irishtimes.com/opinion/2023/05/15/coercive-control-it-creeps-up-on-you-slowly-and-quickly-at-the-same-time/
 

 

May 15
Signs of unhealed trauma:
- depression
- rage
- addiction
- PTSD
- pain
- guilt/shame
- flashbacks
- sleep issues
- fear of abandonment

May 15
When you work on your trauma, you choose to not pass it on to the next generation.

May 15
People don't abandon people they love. They abandon people they were using.

May 15
Why Vulnerability is important
- Greater strength
- Stronger relationships
- Improved self-acceptance

May 15
Defensive Exclusion:
"Emotions too intense to process. To ensure survival, resorting to defense mechanisms that exclude and constrict emotion so as not to be overwhelmed"
Diana Fosha, 2006

May 15
All those words that basically beat person down. Saying to the child you're worthless, you're no good, you suck, how dare you think to do this things. Verbally and emotionally abuse – create to think they are rotten.
🟥Irene Lyon
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gKi7_rzlbBs

May 16
Missing piece: Self-forgiveness. You have these schemes in head: there is something wrong with me. I am bad, I am not good enough, I am unworthy, I am bad person. Permission that our need is extraordinarily important.
🟥Healing Avoidant Attachment
https://youtube.com/watch?v=XQa9TRnFnJM
 

May 16
There's nothing wrong with feeling. There's nothing wrong with having a problem. There's nothing wrong with feeling shame. There's nothing wrong with feeling rejected or not good enough. It is deeply human. Embrace humanness within you.Nothing wrong.
🟥Healing Avoidant Attachment

May 16
I didn't even know what color I even liked after dealing with a narcissistic relationship. I always had to think about the other person and constantly how they felt because I had to push myself aside. I didn't realize accepting myself.
🟥Samantha Saunders
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1YtEOoqLDUg
 

 May 16
He made fun of himself in his rap and now the other person had nothing more to say. Because he put it out there, as oppose to hide it. Put it out there in proactive way and embrace it. “I'm shy”. Let them know it. Now it's out there.
🟥JulienHimself
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcXtQGXIgzg

May 16
Pretending to be something you're not, you're going to create going to create a prison of paranoia where you will always walking around on eggshells,afraid of being found out. Let that person see everything that is you. Otherwise-it's front
🟥JulienHimself
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcXtQGXIgzg
 

 May 16
When you stop caring – easy. Authenticity is the number one way to screen to make sure you're surrounded with the right people. Shines away anyone that's not meant to resonate or connect with you.
🟥JulienHimself
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcXtQGXIgzg

May 16
Authenticity is polarizing by default. Meaning: when chatting some of us will get along, some will not, and we'll disagree. Just by being authentic. If suddenly you try to make everyone agree: that's people pleaser, fake, manipulative.
🟥JulienHimself
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcXtQGXIgzg
 

May 16
There has to be non-friction. You put authenticity out there and you repel those and you attract those you're meant to be with. You put videos out there, they say screw you, but they wouldn't even be your client.
🟥JulienHimself
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcXtQGXIgzg
 

 May 16
Attachment Style Quiz
Attachment refers to how you think and relate to others, especially in romantic relationships.
Are you “clingy” in your relationships? Or are you more independent and comfortable being alone for long periods?

https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/attachment-style-quiz

 
May 16
We're only as needy as our unmet needs.
John Bowlby

May 16
Life is best organized as a series of daring ventures from a secure base.
John Bowlby

May 16
We do as we have been done by.
John Bowlby

May 16
Behind the mask of indifference is bottomless misery and behind apparent callousness, despair.
John Bowlby

May 16
You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
Snowflake? Yes. I've heard this term. I think sociopaths use it to discredit the notion of empathy.
John Cleese

May 16
In hatred as on love, we grow like the thing we brood upon. What we loathe, we graft into our very soul.
Mary Ainsworth

May 16
Trauma is any terrifying event that instantly changes the world as we know it, leaving us helpless and emotionally overwhelmed.
Sue Johnson

May 16
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.
Jon Kabat-Zinn

May 16
Our task is to generate spontaneous social behaviors that will avoid extinction.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
Everyone is born a genius, but the process of living de-geniuses them.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
The reward for being a good problem solver is to be heaped with more and more difficult problems to solve.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
People never leave a sinking ship until they see the lights of another ship approaching.
Buckminster Fuller

May 16
You cannot change how someone thinks, but you can give them a tool to use which will lead them to think differently.
Buckminster Fuller

May 17
Before I say anything else – if you are in abusive relationship in any form – you should do your best to get out of it. Because you're not loving yourself by staying. And it's not helping this person by staying there to be someone to abuse.
🟥John of New
https://youtube.com/watch?v=nwtofh6D37E

May 17
Understand they are in fear and anxiety, they don't feel they are in power without the alcohol. They will never break out of that cycle until they have a consequence. And sometimes that consequence is leaving them. Not in your life.
🟥John of New
https://youtube.com/watch?v=nwtofh6D37E
 

May 17
Loving yourself enough not to allow someone to verbally abuse you. Don't take in what they say. It doesn't matter what they say. Because if they are inebriated (intoxicated) they're not thinking in clear mind anyway. It have no hold on you.
🟥John of New
https://youtube.com/watch?v=nwtofh6D37E
 

May 17
When we avoid something, we give it a power. But when we accept it, it takes a bit of intensity away. When we start to feel a little bit comfortable with shame in our body it becomes easier.
🟥cptsdrecovery
https://youtube.com/shorts/3pXH8gMBdPI
 

 May 17
Relationship advice that is given to most people is not going to work for people who are going through narcissistic abuse. If ground rules are that your reality is revised, invalidated, other person refuse, quiet quitting may be the best way
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=eMn9brCK8zE

May 17
Unfortunately most people who go through narc relationship have listened for so long how they're “too sensitive”, “too emotional”, not willing to fight. Then they're say "Maybe I shouldn't disengage" & you take blame for being unhealthy one.
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=eMn9brCK8zE
 

May 17

Faroe islands

 

 

May 17

Why would any of my people want to indulge in that kind of behavior?
- Apparently, outlawing violent thought hasn't made it go away. All you've done is force people to share it in back alleys.
Star Trek: Voyager: Season 4, Episode 9

May 18

Self-Regulation : No matter what you're feeling you can act according to your higher brain. 1. To talk your feelings to someone and not judge you. 2. New perspective, what your allergy is. 3. Someone being compassionate to you.
🟥Dr. Claudia Luiz
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oppO0-BVKPk

May 18

INFJs pick up everything in social situations. They remove all other factors and focus on what they perceive in the person. Being able to analzye person and spit out result really quickly. Is something is off with person, they pick it up.
🟥The INFJ Circle
https://youtube.com/watch?v=KKY5leTDEaE

May 18

Boundaries are not about what we're asking the other person to do. That's a request. We can place a request but not sure they uphold it. Boundaries are about what we're going to do. If you keep doing x then I'm going to do y.
🟥Kati Morton
https://youtube.com/watch?v=p541zGLfhyQ
 

May 18

When we develop shame-bound identities, when we believe huge integral parts who we are are things we need to hide away from world, that causes to develop pervasive social mask. This isn't just being overly polite, "standing up for ourselves"
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=D5Zxdt_SkwE
 

May 18

Notice the ways in which you routinely detach from your authentic self in order to keep feelings safe. Start listening what they tell. Where are you dissociating, numbing out, detaching from true emotional state. What I'd feel I not numbed?
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=D5Zxdt_SkwE
 

May 18

We get so caught up on behavior we don't want to do. That we lose sight what is underlying all of that. And that's real problem that needs to be tackled. I have to process what I was feeling. Revisit what triggered to do that thing?
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=D5Zxdt_SkwE
 

May 18

Learn how to tolerate those emotional experiences without immediately rushing in to fix and to extract lessons and understanding what my feelings are telling me. This is how we develop emotional discernment.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=D5Zxdt_SkwE

 

May 18

Emotional discernment allows us to stay present and engaged enough to tell what feels right for us, what we feel aligned with and what feels wrong for us. Better at making decisions which situations are wise to place ourselves in.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=D5Zxdt_SkwE

May 18

Let me be clear on this:
There'll be no salvation without suffering, and you're not smarter than I am.
🎞️The Invisible Guest (2016)

May 18

Power makes the wolf bigger than he is. But I'm not scared of wolves like you. When you have the most terrifying experience a parent can go through, having your child taken from you, vanishing without anyone caring, fear doesn't exist anymore.
🎞️The Invisible Guest (2016)

May 18

Are you familiar with the concept of lateral thinking? It consists of changing the perspective from which one analyzes events. The answer has to be in the nature of your own story.
- What you expect me to see?
- The details. Focus on the details.
🎞️The Invisible Guest (2016)

May 18

Details have always been in front of our eyes, but you have to analyze them from a different perspective. What if the answer to the enigma was never inside the room, but outside.
🎞️The Invisible Guest (2016)

May 19

Scene from Sleepaway Camp (1983).

 May 19

If for whatever reason you developed the belief about yourself that there is something wrong with you, that you are flawed, or broken or not like other people at your core, you are likely struggling with shame bound identity.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 19

In order to properly heal we need to feel, and learn to integrate that shame that is at our core. We cannot personal-develop our way out of it. We cannot succeed our way out of it.
Until we realize it is not truth about who we are.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 19

The goal here is not to change any of your behaviour. It's simply to change your mindset from one of judgment to one of curiosity and openness to understanding. Think yourself as science experiment. Observant of your patterns and behaviors.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 19

Develop some sort of language for why you are thinking, feeling, and behaving the way that you are. Because if you do not have broken soul and if you are not inherently flawed, broken and bad:there must be explanation for what is going on 4u
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

 

May 19

If you're living with the worldview that there are people who are just inherently bad,broken, flawed in their souls, you're going to find a way on bad days to convince yourself that you're one of those people. Decide there are no such people
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 19 

Give up your villain stories. This does not mean you have to like, respect or put up with bad treatment. Consider possibility it doesn't have all that much to do with you. They treat you that way because they are product of their experiences
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 19

Under the right circumstances everybody exhibit trauma responses. And some of those lead to very bad behavior that harms other people. Understand that we too are not immune to that. Better than believing they treat us because we are terrible
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pA1i-vLWMbE

May 20
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches.
Dita Von Teese

May 20
"You should talk more"

May 20
"Maybe I'm actually more of an extrovert"

May 20
Someone who's been mentally abused will:
- constantly apologize
- feeling not enough
- hide feelings
- hypersensitive to criticism
- breakdown during small disagreements
- need a lot of assurance
- struggle to put guard down

May 20
Those with avoidant style learned from young age that processing emotional pain was not as important as understanding why things happen in way they did. It is our emotional responses that help us make intelligent decisions.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA

May 20
Those using dismissive avoidant attachment strategies learned that it's not that important to focus on negative emotion. You learned very early on that when you express negative emotions it meant you'd not get what you want, or get punished.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA

May 20
Instead of feeling wounded or hurt when something painful happens to you, your brain has developed this defense mechanism of “this cruel person was not logical, and I can comfort myself I know better than them”.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA
 

May 20
Problem is you get stuck in these cycles because you are not being present with and processing the pain that these cycles are causing you. Brain kind of neutralizes memory because you learned it's not important to focus on the negative.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA

May 20
If you have avoidant attachment style you're not factoring in what the emotion of the moment is going to do to your attachment system and what defenses are going to be popping up for you as consequence of a difficult situation.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA

May 20
So when your partner is dysregulated, yelling at you, saying about your character, it's unlikely you feel pain of that. Likely you're defensive and dismissive, loud or inside. Problem: pain is not getting through, unable to learn the lesson:
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA

May 20
We just decide “I can bear anything, I can get through anything” so I will just accept any situation and then figure out how to logically maneuver my way through – we are robbing ourselves of ability to put ourselves in better situations.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA
 

May 20
Allow yourself to feel the pain consciously that you usually defend yourself against. That skill helps you set clear meaningful boundaries. We need negative emotion to help us break loops of bad behaviour and start choosing different things.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=esJj49ARgVA
 

May 20
I realized that it's the person who can accept madness of this world that is truly insane.
🎞️Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man - episode 28

May 21
Štruklji

May 21
Feelings don't always tell us truth. Feelings are not facts. Mistake we make is we let our feelings determine our mood. We are being ruled by our feelings. We can say Feelings, you are not the boss of me.
✝️JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1nzrWOhLmgg

May 21
When you add “yet” angels go to work. When you choose to praise instead of complain forces of darkness are broken. When you're consistent, stable, always in a good mood – you give the enemy a nervous breakdown.
✝️JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1nzrWOhLmgg
 

May 21
Misandry (/mɪˈsændri/) is the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against men.
- 'Man-up'
- 'boys don't cry'

May 21
In 1990 I made newspapers for our class (7. grade in grammar school)
These were pages for the final issue:
- Front page
- Introduction
- School news
- Fun
- Science Fiction story
- Opinions from the classroom
- Jokes
- Mozaique
- Comic book
- Summer and Winter story
- Final hello

May 22
With Fearful-Avoidant there is a very different and unique situation that arises. Have access to both Avoidance and Anxious attachment system. Over rely on logic but flip to other side and over rely on emotional experience.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

May 22
Secure people have strong access both to emotions, feelings, body awareness, inform how they feeling, and they have access to logic, cognition, figuring out and critically analyzing why people behave the way they are.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

May 22
The difference is that for secure people they know when to use each of those strategies, choosing to either logically analyze or trust their emotions. They don't live in a state of thinking one side or the other side is shameful. Check both.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

 

May 22
You have this idea that is avoidant or fearful. And then in relationship you see the opposite part of yourself come out and you feel like you lose yourself. “I don't get like this” “I don't get worked up like this”“I'm not usually like this”
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

May 22
Error keeps you stuck over and over again. You did not lose yourself. You found part of yourself that you are normally very skilled at repressing and not let other people see. Like monster inside of them they hide from the world.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

 

May 22
And if you feeling just a little bit lonely
don't sit at home just hoping
Come on down to where the spirit flows so free
You know that door is always open
Carole King - Hard Rock Café (1977)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=lwoHbx_68hI
 

 

May 22
If you have a facet of your attachment system you frequently neglect – pressure is getting stonger, lid comes off you feel it all at once. Whether it's anger, preoccupation or extreme form of disgust towards other people, self-righteousness.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

May 22
This will require you to put down a significant part of your ego. If you're someone who defines yourself as avoidant, logical, analytical, you pride yourself on how many strong emotions you do not feel. Accept there is emotional part in you.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

 

May 22
Find a way to work that part of yourself into your overall identity. That includes side of yourself that is vulnerable. Who can be open to learning through relationships. On flip side of this if you think of yourself as chronically innocent.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

May 22
Never doing anything strategically or never making decisions that upsets other people – it's going to be difficult for you to accept that there is significant part of you that is quite self-interested. Not concerned at all with your partner.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

May 22
Self interest is not altogether negative thing. Secure people know when it is time to co-regulate and when it's time to tend for their own needs with compassion and boundary. Integrate what you normally trying to repress.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

May 22
When you get deactivated all of the sudden all of emotions you've been feeling are absent from your awareness and all you can see – is all of the problems, all of the faults, why won't work. Practice analyzing from more objective standpoint.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk

 

May 22
Learn to see relationship more evenly for what it is. This might mean welcoming back feedback. Making sure you keep running list what you are looking for on practical level.
No longer centering your identity around a portion of who you are.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

 

May 22
The problem is not that you are hiding this part of yourself well enough, it's that you're not exposing it to air enough. Things need oxygen to function properly. We keep these parts compartmentalized, showed away-they grow messed up inside.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=gqPnXU_JKOk
 

 May 22
What is your comfort level with their different responses back at you. Some people don't mind narc rage. Less you care about their rage, more you can respond honestly and just face their rage. If you get lucky - it might not get them angry.
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oudVImBWrq0

May 22
You have to get inside their heads. Different narcs wants different things. Some want always be positive. Some want always working, some want to validate them, some never let them know you have problems. That's not relationship, it never was
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oudVImBWrq0
 

 May 22
Narcissistic people feel entitled to live in the world where there are no rainy days. They don't want to hear about your problems or issues, it's too inconvenient. Most of us don't want to deal with their tantrums.
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oudVImBWrq0

May 22
I have to interact with those people just to “keep my trains running on time”.You all have people like that in your life, too. I really don't want a friendship or a relationship with these people but they are in my life. It's never deep.
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oudVImBWrq0

 

May 22
Most importantly you can't win. There is no version where you respond to narcissist in the right way every time. It hurts your head to think it all through, to mind read them. Figure out the stakes. Rage will vary. Constant calculation.
🟥DoctorRamani
https://youtube.com/watch?v=oudVImBWrq0

 

May 22
Narcissist is the exact equivalent of a parasite, kind of human tapeworm. He infiltrates your mind, takes over and makes you believe things that not there. It makes you experience emotions that are not yours. Makes you to obey his voices
🟥Prof. Sam Vaknin
https://youtube.com/watch?v=mVxzztuv96Y

 May 22
We are synchronization animals. We're synchronized beings. We sink into each other. We become one in social groups. We always become a hive, create colonies. We are not advanced than ants or bees on biological level.
🟥Prof. Sam Vaknin
https://youtube.com/watch?v=mVxzztuv96Y

May 22
If you're exposed to abuser-emotions you're experiencing are of the abuser. Artifacts. Identity is protected by boundaries. If you don't have an identity, you're wide open to attack. Without memory you don't have identity:abuser disables
🟥Prof. Sam Vaknin
https://youtube.com/watch?v=mVxzztuv96Y
 

May 23
As heard on LuxuriaMusic Radio:
I Wanna Be Loved · Ann-Margret (1963)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=RUQRohsYEbo
 

May 23
Jupiter’s icy moon Europa / Photon Mono M5s
🟥Minibricks craft
https://youtube.com/watch?v=xRtalLwrrWg
 

 

May 23
Nobody is going to be comfortable being called out. However somebody who doesn't have narc issue, has empathy for you, doesn't have ill will towards you, is going to want to meet you in the middle. Narc can't be vulnerable, to be flawed.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AZ0x_u_TrII

May 23
What you'll notice is a pattern of somebody with high narcissistic traits to need to show who's the boss. So if you raise your voice, narc is going to have to raise their voice. Narc sense a loss of power, you try to hold them accountable.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AZ0x_u_TrII

 

May 23
Narc equate that with vulnerability and vulnerability is “weak”. Narc can be passive aggressive; just listen to you. And then there will be some way that narc show you who's the boss: mind game. You end up questioning everything. Wait,what
🟥Lisa A. Romano
http://youtube.com/watch?v=AZ0x_u_TrII

 

May 23
Their goal is to keep you insecure. And keep you chasing them. So you're always chasing their approval and they tend to be hot and cold. It's a very inconsistent relationship. Ask yourself if you feel off balance, that is red flag.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AZ0x_u_TrII

May 23
Those grown up in dysfunctional home we haven't been taught that what we think and what we feel are valid. We've been conditioned to suppress our emotions, repress. Suppression is – I am not going to think about something.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=UIvaL_-P6bc
 

 May 23
You're conditioned to worry about everybody else but yourself. How do you then set a boundary –you can't, that is why you get pushed around. You settle for breadcrumbs. You don't know how to assert self. That is not your fault,Loss of self
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=UIvaL_-P6bc

May 23
You have been taught that boundaries equal punishment. Your brain will override red flag because it has been conditioned to fear a negative outcome for setting a boundary. Feeling connected to these sick people. Become individualized.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=UIvaL_-P6bc

May 23
🟥Lavinia Stamps Videos
https://youtube.com/@LaviniaStampsVideos/videos

May 23
Hever Castle mazes, Kent.
On Thursday 29 June some attractions and parts of the grounds will be closed for filming.
https://hevercastle.co.uk/hever-attractions/the-mazes/
 

May 23
Your body is responding to fight or flight response: chemicals are being produced in your bloodstream and your limbic system is responding naturally. Your nervous system is overly activated. Observe consequence of overreaction. Sit with it
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=MgYV2mxwtd0

 May 23
My body is experiencing these sensations but I am ok. I am not these physical sensations. When we are in trauma response, chemicals in our body want to take over, and our habits of thought, behaviour -that keeps us stuck. Observe trigger.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=MgYV2mxwtd0

May 23
This is reactivity. We lose our sense of control. We are giving our power over to external experiences so there's great value in learning to regulate your emotions. You can't fix hole in the wall you cannot see.
🟥Lisa A. Romano
https://youtube.com/watch?v=MgYV2mxwtd0

 

May 23
Singer Peyton Parrish is known for his throaty brand of Viking-inspired country and post-grunge, as well as his inventive cover tunes.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=2QMsIcZt8Ec

 

May 24
Well, it turns out that the DSM might be more of a political document than a scientific one, guarding the financial interests of some of the most powerful entities in America rather than doing what's best for patients.
🟥Nice People
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AGjDCU3x-As

May 24
While PTSD symptoms can be debilitating and take over person's life, they don't fundamentally change or shape who that person is  at their core.
cPTSD - baggage from trauma gets hardwired into nervous system, psyche & shapes who they become.
🟥Nice People
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AGjDCU3x-As
 

 May 24
Much like the VA not wanting to acknowledge that war leads to Veterans' PTSD, the same powers do not want to acknowledge the social realities and failures in public health system that give rise to the conditions in which people develop cPTSD.
🟥Nice People
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AGjDCU3x-As

May 24
Acknowledging the reality of early deprivation, abuse, and neglect inevitably would lead to an invitation to change the social system.
Van Der Kolk, Bessel "The Politics of Mental Health"
Psychotherapy Networker, 2019

May 24
The DSM, especially the last 2 versions, is primarily driven and controlled by psychiatrists, insurance companies and the psychopharmacological industry.
Each group has a direct financial interest in focusing on individual pathology.
🟥Nice People
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AGjDCU3x-As

May 24
It's important to understand diagnostically what is a person that is pathologically narcissistic. They're 1 of 3 personality disorders. Inability to understand, empathize and stop the harm you cause others, lack of empathy. Rigid reaction.
🟥Ross Rosenberg
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_Jy_M5vqj5o
 

May 24
Predictive awareness is the ability to predict the reaction that will follow the boundary. They'll do anything to shut you up to ruin your credibility. So if you know this then it makes no sense to expose them. You can't win, can't survive
🟥Ross Rosenberg
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_Jy_M5vqj5o

 

May 24
Mild delusion where you believe that you're going to get the love and respect, caring and trust that you put into, getting it back. Like a hamster in hamster wheel you get on that wheel and move forward with that expectation run furiously.
🟥Ross Rosenberg
https://youtube.com/watch?v=07P5L1lWQM8

May 24
Your supposed “mistakes” or gaslight ideas about yourself that somehow justify in your mind to be deserving of such hunger. To solve this problem understand the narratives, the scripts of our childhood written to appreciate breadcrumbs.
🟥Ross Rosenberg
https://youtube.com/watch?v=07P5L1lWQM8

May 24
Oliver Twist story: he won't ask for more if he knows what's in store. Child finds out that the consequence/the punishment for a request they shut it down. Seems ok being hungry all the time. It is your birth right to be self love abundant
🟥Ross Rosenberg
https://youtube.com/watch?v=07P5L1lWQM8

May 24
Swiss SRF1 radio just played
Tina Turner - Spiritual Message - 'Beyond':
Nothing last forever. No one lives forever. Embrace the cycle of life that is the greatest love.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GOVYDIHeecA
 

 
May 24
Go beyond fear. Beyond fear takes you into place where love grows. When you refuse to follow the impulses of fear, anger and revenge.
Beyond means to feel yourself. Start every day singing like the birds.
🟥Tina Turner - Spiritual Message - 'Beyond'
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GOVYDIHeecA

May 24
Greatest moment in our lives is when we allow us to teach each other. Take the journey inside of you. To become quiet to hear the beyond. To become patient to receive the beyond.
🟥Tina Turner - Spiritual Message - 'Beyond'
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GOVYDIHeecA

 

May 24
Love grows when you trust. When you trust love heals and renews. Love inspires and empowers us to do great things. And makes us a better person to love. When you go beyond that's where you find true love.
🟥Tina Turner - Spiritual Message - 'Beyond'
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GOVYDIHeecA

 

May 25
“My relationship with Ike was doomed the day he figured out I was going to be his moneymaker. He needed to control me, economically and psychologically, so I could never leave him.” So Tina made a move to reclaim her self-identity in the divorce.

https://ultimateclassicrock.com/tina-turner-ike-divorce/

 May 25
Don't ever let anybody teach you to think, Lance. It is the curse of the world.
King Arthur, Camelot

May 25
Just because you can't understand something, it doesn't mean it's wrong!
The Sword in the Stone, 1963

May 25
If people reach perfection they vanish, you know.
The Once and Future King, 1958

May 25
It is necessary, first of all, to find a correct logical starting point, one which can lead us to a natural and sound interpretation of the empirical facts.
🟨Ernst Cassierer

May 25
"That when we are told to be calm no matter what it is in fact gaslighting in the same way an abusive partner invalidate their victim’s perception of reality."

May 25
Mastery is not a question of genetics of luck, but of following your natural inclinations and the deep desires that stirs you from within.
Robert Greene

May 25
I think people only like to think they're putting on an act. But it's really them. Don't you behave differently with different people? With your family? With your friends you're another way. With your teachers you're another way. So which one is you?
🎞️Carnal Knowledge (1971)

May 25
You don't need those games, Jonathan. I know. I've played more than anyone. The obedient son game, the bright student game... the cocksman's game, the good father game, the specialist game. Games don't impress Jennifer--just life, just love.
🎞️Carnal Knowledge (1971)

May 26
You are limited by your own imagination
🟥FitFrHome
https://youtube.com/shorts/wnzu2UrCprs
 

 
May 26
And I'll bet my simple healthy instincts against yours any day.
🎞️Inside Daisy Clover (1965)

May 26
The more you judge others, the more you judge yourself. By constantly seeing the bad in others, we train our minds to find the bad. This can lead to increase in stress. Stress can weaken the immune system and cause high blood pressure, fatigue, depression, anxiety and even stroke

May 26
Temporary Email Address - Temp Mail provides temporary, secure, anonymous, free, disposable email address.
https://temp-mail.org/en/
 

May 27
Looks like Chuck is going to put hot-dog in a bun.
🎞️ Grumpy Old Men (1993)

May 27
As far as I know your life ends when you try to control your faith. I don't want to know how my every move affects my future. I'm just going to do what I think is right and hope everything turns out for the best.
🎞️Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man - episode 34

May 27
Doing things for others  - Enabling:
Things people can and should do for themselves

May 27
You have a new way, new path, a new compass – but you still have the same toxic friends and toxic family members. You still have the same bad habits. Same fears, same baggage, same thing you wrestle with. Become student of one who saved you
✝️HOUR OF POWER
https://youtube.com/watch?v=d-DaT1jo2ho
 

May 27
Importance and the power to build a future by becoming a farmer. Future based on the kinds of seeds you're planting in the ground today. When you put your visions, seeds in the ground they become more than seeds: breakthroughs.
✝️HOUR OF POWER
https://youtube.com/watch?v=d-DaT1jo2ho

May 27
Most gay men and lesbians grow up learning that to be gay is to be sick, to be unnatural, to be a sinner. Such negative attitudes have produced: shame.
Kaufman & Raphael reveal how gay men and lesbians have internalized shame, resulting in self-loathing and destructive behaviors.

May 27
If I reveal myself without worrying about how others will respond, then some will care, though others may not. But who can love ne, if no one knows me? I must risk it, or live alone.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27
In the long run we get no more than we have been willing to risk giving.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27
'Killing the Buddha on the road' means destroying the hope that anything outside of ourselves can be our master. No one is any bigger than anyone else.
There are no mothers or fathers of grown-ups, only sisters and brothers.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

We are all born into families and cultures we didn't choose, given names we didn't pick, instructed in behaviour and values we might not have freely chosen, and too often we end up expected to live lives designed by others.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

Everything good is costly, and the development of the personality is one of the most costly of all things. It will cost you your innocence, your illusions, your certainty.
Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

We must learn to give ourselves permission to blunder, to fail, and to make fools of ourselves every day for the rest of our lives. We do so in any case.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

 

May 27

- We are all already dying.
- If you have a hero look again; you have diminished yourself in some way.
- All evil is potential vitality in need of transformation.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

 May 27

It is not possible to know how much is just enough, until we have experienced how much is more than enough.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

Often things are as bad as they seem.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

Maintaining the illusion that I am in control is futile, lonely, and in the long run more always costly than the effort is worth.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp 

May 27

Escape is not a dirty word. None of us can face what's happening head-on all of the time.
🟦Sheldon B. Kopp

May 27

The counterfeit innovator is wildly self-confident.
The real one is scared to death.
Steven Pressfield "the War of Art"

May 27

Your imagination is the hood ornament on the car of creativity.
🟦Gary Busey

May 27

I held my fear by the hand, honored its existence, and thanked it for teaching me that happiness exists beyond the boundaries it creates.
🇪🇨Yung Pueblo

May 28

Subliminal messages - it's how you get people to do what you want without them knowing it.
- Yeah. Where you learned that?
- Geraldo.
🎞️Grumpier Old Men (1995)

May 28

The abuse of the past often exists as the shame of today, and the shame is perpetuated through our patterns of interaction.
🟦Merle A. Fossum

May 28
It is only the great men who are truly obscene. If they had not dared to be obscene, they could never have dared to be great.
🟦Havelock Ellis

May 28
All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
🟦Havelock Ellis

May 28
It is in our failures that we base a new and different and better success.
🟦Havelock Ellis

May 28
Every society has the criminals that it deserves.
🟦Havelock Ellis

May 28
Life is livable because we know that wherever we go most of the people we meet will be restrained in their actions towards us by an almost instinctive network of taboos.
🟦Havelock Ellis

May 28
Things that are complex are not useful. Things that are useful are simple.
🇷🇺Mikhail Kalashnikov

May 28
All the seemingly positive valuations and judgments of ressentiment are hidden devaluations and negations.
(ressentiment = a psychological state resulting from suppressed feelings of envy and hatred which cannot be satisfied.)
🟨Max Scheler

May 28
ressentiment:
deep-seated resentment, frustration and hostility accompanied by a sense of being powerless to express these feelings directly

May 28
Genuine and fruitful criticism judges all opinions with reference to the object itself. Ressentiment criticism, on the contrary, accepts no "object" that has not stood the test of criticism.
🟨Max Scheler

May 28
Certain emotions and affects are normal components of human nature.
Ressentiment repression leads to the constant tendency to indulge in judgments: revenge, hatred, malice, envy, detraction and spite.
🟦Max Scheler

May 28
The awareness of our limitations will end with the defamation of the world and all its values.
🟨Max Scheler

May 29
The first Bluecrown Passionflower's bloom this year.

May 29
Late May blooms.

May 29
The experiences and behaviors regarded as indicative of mental illness were really "strategies that a person invents in order to live in an unlivable situation".

 May 29
Emotional access to the truth is the indispensable precondition of healing.
🟨Alice Miller

May 29
For one is free from it only when self-esteem is based on the authenticity of ones own feelings and not on the possession of certain qualities.
🟨Alice Miller

May 29
It was not the beautiful or pleasant feelings that gave me new insight, but the ones against which I fought most strongly; helpless, humiliated, resentful, sad.
🟨Alice Miller

May 29
Disrespect is the weapon of the weak.
🟨Alice Miller

May 29
Emotional abuse cuts to the very core of a person, creating scars that may be longer lasting than physical ones.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
Life is a fantasy until you wake up in shock.
Artist: Mac Miller
Album: Circles
Genres: Hip-Hop/Rap, UK Rap

May 29
Critical words to a child are as painful and damaging as being physically hit. Insulting names echo in a child's mind over and over again until he comes to believe that is all he is.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
Children who feel unloved and unprotected try to please others, give to others, and care for others in a desperate hope that they may make themselves worthy.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
When someone is unrelentingly critical of you, always finds faults, can never be pleased, and blames you for everything that goes wrong, it is the insidious nature and cumulative effects of the abuse that do the damage.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears away at the victim's self-confidence, sense of self, trust in her perceptions and self-concept.
🟨Beverly Engel

May 29
Let others know when they hurt or angered you. By not speaking up when someone insults or mistreats you, you are inadvertently giving permission for him or her to continue to treat you in the same way in the future.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
Survivors have a difficult time expressing their feelings. They are more accustomed to minimizing their pain and hiding how they really feel, both from themselves and others.
🟦Beverly Engel

May 29
Accepting that your imperfections and so-called negative attributes are part of what makes you unique will help you to stop continually trying to be someone or something that you are not.
🟨Beverly Engel

May 29
The biggest abuses in society happen when people are not able to communicate and not able to connect.
🟨Heather Brooke

May 29
It is impossible to correct abuses unless we know that they're going on.
🟦Julian Assange

May 30
What we dwell on is what we become.

May 30
Be selective about personal details we reveal to a co-worker because they may use this information in a way to devalue us or assassinate our character with that information. They try to create impression our life is screwed in some way.
🟥jasoncerrotalks
https://youtube.com/shorts/HwI9X4kzEww
 

May 30
That would be the way to knock us down and propel themselves especially if there is promotion. Don't engage with co-worker who is having anger outburst that seems to be driven by unfairness or injustice or petty complaint.
🟥jasoncerrotalks
https://youtube.com/shorts/HwI9X4kzEww
 

May 30
If it is completely legitimate they should be able to take that to management. Getting sucked into situation that does not really involve us can be a barrier to us successfully completing our work objectives. Redirect slander.
🟥jasoncerrotalks
https://youtube.com/shorts/HwI9X4kzEww
 

May 30
“What you think about so and so”. Vulnerable narcissist will store our answer by putting it in their back pocket, twist it into something it's not and use it against us for some sort of self gain.
🟥jasoncerrotalks
https://youtube.com/shorts/HwI9X4kzEww
 

May 30
Difference between Tantrum and Meltdown,
works for adults too:

May 30
Tantrum or Meltdown

May 30
I wanted to see just what kind of verbal abuse people can take before they start objecting, before they start lashing back. And it really surprised me that nobody said anything to stop me."You can't do that". Nobody said that.
🎞️Stanford prison experiment

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlTckUZlz7M

May 30
To have an insecure attachment style means that you fairly consistently distort information. And use a lot of storytelling to navigate your romantic relationships. Anxious: you do idealizing your partner & can shift to villain story quickly.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=0bww6ichQ-Q

May 30
There is some inciting incident that is triggering you into deactivation. If you can figure what that is, put down any judgments. And actually figure out what you needed in that moment that you didn't have that triggered you. Address those.
🟥Heidi Priebe
https://youtube.com/watch?v=0bww6ichQ-Q

 

May 30
People who upload these meltdown videos truly believe they're raising "autism awareness", but they're not. All they're doing is teaching their child that their opinions don't matter.

May 30
Diagnosis is not an excuse to be selective about their rights.

May 30
Even though the researchers said they could quit, the prisoners felt that they couldn't.
🇺🇸Stanford prison experiment
https://slideshare.net/srgeorgi/stanford-prison-experiment-76016238
 

 May 30
Our behavior is drastically affected by the situation: to prevent evil behavior, don't focus on changing individuals, focus on changing the situations that enable them to behave badly.
🇺🇸Stanford prison experiment
https://slideshare.net/srgeorgi/stanford-prison-experiment-76016238

May 30
Social Forces involved:
1. Deferral of responsibility to authority
2. Diffusion of responsibility
3. Identity change
4. Power of the situation
🇺🇸Stanford prison experiment
https://slideshare.net/srgeorgi/stanford-prison-experiment-76016238

 

May 30
Zimbardo based the Stanford Prison Experiment on social power - i.e. the forces available to motivate attitude/behavior change.
🇺🇸Stanford prison experiment
https://slideplayer.com/slide/12789473/
 

 ·
May 30
The question is, does the goodness of the people overwhelm the bad situation, or does the bad situation overwhelm the good people?
🟦Philip Zimbardo

May 30
The results of the Stanford Prison Experiment showed that situational factors and power dynamics played a significant role in shaping participants' behavior. The guards became abusive and authoritarian, while the prisoners became submissive and emotionally distressed.

May 30
6 types of social power:
- reward
- coercive
- referent
- legitimate
- expert
- informational

May 30
Coercive: this power is based on the ability to punish a person for failure to comply

May 30
Your responses to the events of life are more important than the events themselves.
🟨Virginia Satir

May 30
“Bad systems” create “bad situations” create “bad apples” create “bad behaviors,” even in good people.
🟦The Lucifer Effect by Philip G. Zimbardo

May 30
We must not allow other people's limited perceptions to define us.
🟦Virginia Satir

May 30
Love without clutching,
appreciate without judging,
join without invading,
leave without guilt,
criticize without blaming,
help without insulting.
🟦Virginia Satir

May 30
Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open and rules are flexible.
🟦Virginia Satir

May 30
You have learned what you have learned very well. It has helped you survive.
🟦Virginia Satir

May 30
Our biggest problem as human beings is not knowing that we don't know.
🟨Virginia Satir

May 30
You cannot find peace by avoiding life.
🟦Virginia Woolf

May 30
Virginia Satir explained that people often had good intentions but poor communication.

May 30
Communication is to relationship what breath is to life.
🟨Virginia Satir

May 31

It is useless to talk in CBT damaging terms of "will power", being  "strong" and "courageous" and or "competent" and "practice" or  "exposure".
These all will come naturally once our Maslow Needs are satisfied - psychological safety inside us and outside.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2023/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2023.html
 

May 31

...but they do not say what the person was like to whom it happened.
🟦Virginia Woolf

May 31

Without self awareness, we are as babies in the cradle.
🟦Virginia Woolf

May 31

Beatiful Bluecrown Passionflower, plant from South America.

 May 31

You are being manipulated when someone reduces, by any means, your ability to be your own judge of what you do.
🟨Manuel Smith

May 31

You can always find something wrong with someone else if you really want to.
🟨Manuel J. Smith

May 31

You'll never be loved, if you can't risk being disliked.
🟨Manuel J. Smith

May 31

I have one major rule: Everybody is right. More specifically, everybody — including me — has some important pieces of truth, and all of those pieces need to be honored, cherished, and included in a more gracious, spacious, and compassionate embrace.
🟦Ken Wilber

May 31

Adult children of alcoholics guess at what normal behavior is.
🟨Janet G. Woititz

May 31

You are not responsible for everything that doesn't work out and everything that does work out is not a matter of coincidence.
🟨Janet G. Woititz

May 31

Adult children of alcoholics lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth.
Adult children of alcoholics over-react to changes whic hthey have no control.
🟨Janet G. Woititz

May 31

Adult children of alcoholics constantly seek approval.
🟨Janet G. Woititz

May 31

To change your life, you need to change your priorities.
🟦MARK TWAIN

May 31

10 Common Struggles for Adult Children of Alcoholics
1. Being rigid and inflexible
2. Difficulty trusting or being closed off
3. Shame and loneliness
4. Self-criticism
5. Perfectionism
6. People pleasing
7. Being highly sensitive or reactive
8. Being overly responsible...

May 31

14 Traits of an Adult Child of an Alcoholic
We became isolated and afraid of people and authority figures.
We became approval seekers and lost our identity in the process.
We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism.
https://adultchildren.org/literature/laundry-list/
 

 

May 31

    The Flip Side of The Laundry List
We move out of isolation and are not unrealistically afraid of other people, even authority figures.
We do not depend on others to tell us who we are.
We are not automatically frightened by angry people and no longer regard personal criticism...

📙