Feb 1
Today is:
Chinese New Year, also known as the Lunar New Year.
Feb 1
Hills of forest green where the mountains touch the sky
A dream come true, I'll live there 'til I die
I'm city born but I love the country life
I've got a dream I want the world to share an' castle walls
Castles in the Air · Don McLean (1981)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TI9NjQK_xm8
Feb 1
Our ancestors try to tell us 1) we live in a dream, 2) this world is temporary, 3) we're not from here, 4) we are here briefly 5) we are learning something here that we're going to need when we go somewhere else
YT Gregg Braden Official
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qpi6auFau70
Feb 1
China from space.
Feb 2
The most motivating force on the planet is to feel appreciated. To feel like somebody sees you and hears you. And actually appreciates you.
YT Mel Robbins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpFXUrn6dH4
Feb 2
The great resignation; companies think people leave because of compensation. McKinsey study proved people leave organizations because they don't feel valued, or appreciated and they don't feel like they belong. People start to think what they value and matters to them
Mel Robbins
Feb 2
The second you catch yourself worrying, say to yourself: what if it all works out.
Helps the brain to expand out of the current crisis. Makes room for better things to happen.
How and when narrows your focus.
Mel Robbins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpFXUrn6dH4
Feb 2
Whatever human beings get for free, they do not understand their value. If you want to be happy, then always think about the things that you have. Don't think about the things you don't have.
YT Words of Wisdom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phl7A4qZEfw
Feb 2
Fawn is the most common in abuse situation. 'Let me do whatever you can so you don't hurt me'. 'Do whatever they can to make abuser happy'.
How did you react to that threat? Try implement something different.
YT Emotional Embuffination
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UitUVOkC_mo
Feb 2
So if you're not really sure what to do, you just start moving forward. If you get stuck, and you can't move forward anymore, take a step back and try different paths.
YT Making Your Own Path
Emotional Embuffination
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UitUVOkC_mo
Feb 2
You think because of your condition you have the right to push people around? That is truly pathetic.
The Bone Collector (1999)
Feb 2
When someone is mistreating you is your reaction to try to understand where they're coming from? In conflict do you find yourself thinking more about what someone else needs than what you need?
YT Jay Reid - Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ox8Nr8M60qM
Feb 2
If you answered yes, you may have higher than average capacity for empathy. This gift of empathy may be making harder to create distance from narcissistic abuser. To create distance, first be able to ask yourself What should I put up with?
YT Jay Reid
Feb 2
This superpower personality trait of being empathic can sometimes get in the way of knowing what you will and will not put up with from others. Selectively deploy your empathy so you feel free to extend empathy towards yourself
YT Jay Reid
Feb 3
So where child expects and hopes to find that he is valued and love for the unique person he is. He instead is reacted to as if who he is makes impossible to love him. He is reacted as if he has nothing of value to offer.
YT Jay Reid
Feb 3
He doesn't get to learn that he has a right to get angry or appropriately aggressive when others mistreat him. Instead kid learns to censor such reactions because those reactions could result in complete withdrawal from the very same people they need.
https://youtu.be/ox8Nr8M60qM
Feb 3
"It's okay to suck. It's how we learn."
-Willem Dafoe, SNL
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1mEnmBav6ek
Feb 3
I read 3 biographies: Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and Einstein, I hope by reading those I would get a lot smarter. What I found in there each of those 3 men had one thing in common: curiosity.
YT City of Allen - ACTV
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYDaqto22NY
Feb 3
Dorothy Kilgallen went after the facts. She didn't have a conclusion and then fit the facts to that. She came up with the facts and then had a conclusion. Unlike what we see today.
YT City of Allen - ACTV
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYDaqto22NY
Feb 3
Aggression is great if your life is threatened, or someone's going to hurt a child. You need full aggression to shut the person down. Even if it is only verbally. Assertion is what we need most of the time.
YT Mike Mandel Hypnosis
Feb 3
Aggression leads to adrenaline dumps. We become stupider, we're not thinking clearly. Can quickly turn into physical violence. It can also be volume, it is perceived as threat, it is aggressive. Assertion doesn't dominate. It's inner confidence. Aggressive people don't listen.
Feb 3
You let them chose proximity. Assertive people don't interrupt, take time to respond but they don't back down. You don't cave in when you are in the right and when you have a reason for saying what you're saying. Assertive is holding your ground.
YT Mandel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKGWHzNR080
Feb 3
Making eye contact, looking away - that is assertive instead of aggressive. Listen what they say, hold your ground and repeating your point. Validate what they said, repeat what you heard. Give other person to finish their message out. Let them wear themselves out against them.
Feb 3
Young Sherlock Holmes (1985) was inspiration for Harry Potter?
Feb 4
Perhaps the tribal members who were more sensitive to changes in the village's air, sights, and noises served as the proverbial canary in the coal mine.
YT HSP vs Sensitive: Difference Between Sensitive and Highly Sensitive Person
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xn3-T5Z2E4g
Feb 4
1 when you are around with someone emotional upset ignore their words. If you pay attention to words you are likely to get triggered and upset. It becomes just voice. Frees up your brain to do other things.
YT How to Calm any Angry Person in 90 Seconds
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SATS378oWxA
Feb 4
Step 2 - Read emotional data field of this upset person. Let your unconscious brain process. Emotional words will start floating into your consciousness.
YT How to Calm any Angry Person in 90 Seconds with Doug Noll
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SATS378oWxA
Feb 4
3 - reflect back emotions with simple use statements. You are so frustrated, you will disrespected. You feel betrayed. No questions, no causations. Stick with reflecting back emotions.
YT How to Calm any Angry Person in 90 Seconds with Doug Noll
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SATS378oWxA
Feb 4
The amygdala and related limbic regions involved in emotional neural circuits is inhibited and they both happen at same time. One is activated and other is inhibited. And it literally takes 90 seconds for the brain to reverse its poles,from enraged to calm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SATS378oWxA
Feb 4
People will feel grateful for you to listened to them. Reflect back emotions. It is counter-intuitive, you are interrupting people to tell them what they feel. That seems like violating conversational norms.
YT How to Calm any Angry Person in 90 Seconds
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SATS378oWxA
Feb 4
Many people prefer to walk in line, exchanging their individuality &independence for the comfortable benefits of conventionality. Nietzsche's Ubermensch could be considered a call for breaking free from the flock &forging one's individual path
Einzelgänger
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rycIyC_lc-U
Feb 4
They misunderstood his indifferent nature as a symptom of evil. The loner Meursault was the odd one out, defying social norms, being unapolagetically himself. He didn't seem to follow conventional ideas of good and evil, and mainly followed his impulses.
https://youtu.be/rycIyC_lc-U
Feb 4
He was non-comformist. He was different, but didn't feel the need to fit in. People can condemn someone who refuses to play the game. Disapproval from the masses is often experienced by those who follow their own paths.
YT Einzelgänger
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rycIyC_lc-U
Feb 4
People tend to misinterpret those who aren't quite like them. The core idea of Emerson's Self-Reliance is that, above everything else, we should trust our inner voice. And it is not necessary to seek guidance from other people.
YT Einzelgänger
https://youtube.com/watch?v=rycIyC_lc-U
Feb 4
Emerson saw the inner voice as a divine spark or “over-soul” the God that resides within us. In his view, self-reliance means that we follow our inner voices and place them above the voices of others. Person has unique experience that apply to that person.
https://youtu.be/rycIyC_lc-U
Feb 4
We are not victims, we are participants.
Communion (1989)
Feb 4
These visitors do come in gigantic ships and they contact a lot of people. Of course, we say it's thunderstorms or bad dreams, hallucinations, meteors, whatever. But, we are the ones who are hiding.
Communion (1989)
Feb 5
Vivaldi - Winter
(short version)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxYpM8dpPVI
Feb 6
Victoria started to preaching one of my messages. I didn't want to hear that. I wanted her to be depressed with me. Misery loves company. It's good to have friends that pull you up and not join you in defeat.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJ7x8sISXKI
Feb 6
God said Trust me when you are in trouble. Trust me when things don't make sense. Trust me when loved one doesn't make it. If you trust him, God says, I will rescue you and you will give me glory. God will not leave you in dysfunction.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJ7x8sISXKI
Feb 6
Sometimes you have trouble not because you are doing something wrong, but because you're doing something right. It will stir up jealousy, resentment, anger. Critics don't like blessing and favor on your life.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJ7x8sISXKI
Feb 7
Not everything deserves response.
Confidence is silent, insecurities are loud.
YT Just ask Abby
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ih3zzkpWdU4
Feb 7
Greta on location in Northern Sweden, at Jokkmokk.
"A possible mine in Kallak / Gállok, Jokmokk has led to strong reactions from both the Sami and the environmental movement. Today, Greta Thunberg and Fridays for Future are on site in Jokkmokk to protest"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=mOnEZPtzSXQ
Feb 7
Tuning yourself up for what you want while acknowledging what you don't want is really a key to changing your future. A narcissist wants to hold your point of attraction. You cannot allow someone toxic to continue hijack your point of a focus.
Lisa Romano
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcBgbzNVYVs
Feb 7
Rod of Aesculapius
A serpent coiled around a rod was symbol of Roman god of medicine. Snake's shedding - a symbol of renewal and regeneration.
DK The Illustrated Book of Signs and Symbols _- 1000s of Signs and Symbols From Around the World
Feb 7
Caduceus
Mercury, messenger of the gods, cast his magic wand between two warring serpents. Coiled themselves around it, forming a symbol of opposing forced held in balance.
DK The Illustrated Book of Signs and Symbols - 1000s of Signs and Symbols From Around the World
Feb 8
All social anxiety if observed at detail and with microscope - comes down to, and narrows down to, is narcissistic abuse: being afraid of violent, unkind, rude person.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2022/01/my-yt-comments-about-social-anxiety-2022.html
Feb 9
Complex Trauma hits the mainstream media on February 2 2022, ABC Action News:
"Complex PTSD affects the brain long-term and can affect your closest relationships"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ByxXcpvTdU
Feb 9
In a trigger we lose the activity of the frontal lobes in the cerebral cortex, chill brain - allows us to think and feel at the same time. It goes offline and we lose our decision-making, we lose our ability to be focused, grounded.
YT Patrick Teahan LICSW
https://youtu.be/OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
Trauma survivors usually have a hyperactive limbic system. You can think about it as like an overactive smoke detector. Remembers abuse and looks to confirm that it's happening again to keep itself safe.
YT 5 Things To Know When You're Triggered
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
The amygdala doesn't care, or discern or separate the moody partner or the boss from the abusive parents. But our prefrontal lobes can separate - but again these are offline when we're triggered. Body tends to stay in limbic system activation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
Couple of days later body starts to chill out. And you have thought Why I didn't say that? Why I didn't tell them I can't take over project because I don't have access? You are reflecting on conversation and answer comes to you. This is your frontal lobes coming back online.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
Wouldn't it be cool that we didn't have to wait for the adrenaline to subside after days to get back into our non-triggered state? To be more mindful. It is possible to be more aware of your trigger instead of drowning in the trigger.
Patrick Teahan LICSW
Feb 9
Think how it's typically going to go? Almost like you are making fun of your trigger. You don't have to respond or react if you're specially wired for that (lawyer made, building a case, or people pleasing). It will feel like tight rope walk.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
You can take action and respond if you're wired not to. Think of what upset takes me back to. How upset was dumped on me. Think of how you're safer now in the present. You have power to leave or not take so seriously. Or speak up.
YT Patrick Teahan LICSW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoeoAOlCjBA
Feb 9
In Croatian they are called "Hanging old ladies", heralds of the spring.
Feb 13
Playing on classicNL:
Beau, As In Beaumont · Robin Guthrie · Harold Budd
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6IagPaRYdI
Feb 13
It takes toll you begin to wonder is there something wrong and deficient about me? No. With trauma bonding you are with very pathological person, they are the problem.
YT Surviving Narcissism
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPaTyy1zgM
Feb 13
Drop the notion that you are duty bound to narcissist. This notion was drilled into you by somebody who used imperative thinking, communication: you must, you have to, you got to, you're obliged. There's agenda you cannot deviate from. That is wrong notion
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPaTyy1zgM
Feb 13
It's necessary to claim your freedom. They want to take your notion I get to choose for myself. You get to decide what defines you, what traits you want to have most predominant with people. You get to decide your priorities and preferences.
Surviving Narc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPaTyy1zgM
Feb 13
Red flags to trauma bonding: high control lead to conflict and strain, strong opinions, that person will not adjust their thoughts.
YT Surviving Narcissism
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPaTyy1zgM
Feb 14
Cuneiform is one of the earliest systems of writing, emerging in Sumer in the late fourth millennium BC.
The birth of writing,
(Le Monde, National Geographic) Histoire & Civilisations
Feb 14
Enemy Count
In the time of the Neo-Assyrian Empire, scribes (professional copyist) were responsible for counting the heads of enemies who had their throats cut.
British Museum, London
(Le Monde, National Geographic) Histoire & Civilisations
Feb 14
- Do you know what coding a message means?
- That both you and the recipient use the same book. The word in code is found on that particular page, in that particular line.
L'arcano incantatore (1996)
Feb 14
Weakness is fundamental...in enabling the mind not to oppose signals from "outside'.
L'arcano incantatore (1996)
Feb 14
The bat flew away to seek other bodies to hide in and continue his misdeeds.
L'arcano incantatore / Arcane Sorcerer (1996)
Feb 14
Urge to know better, to do better and to be better is part of anxiety, and it creates new anxieties.
Social anxiety tips 3
Feb 15
'Time Traveler' lady with mobile phone from Charlie Chaplin's The Circus (1928) mystery was solved.
YT user recognized the device as Siemens hearing aid "Phonophor".
YT Dark5
5 Strange Mysteries Solved by Reddit and the Internet
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1yF4UgANMr4
Feb 15
Acknowledge negative thoughts, don't try to block these out, won't work. Elizabeth Gilbert says about fear on the creative journey: it gets a seat, it gets a voice, but it doesn't get a vote. It doesn't get to decide where you go next. Shift my perspective
https://youtu.be/r9nRkUAkEnM
Feb 15
Shift your perspective.
Kathleen Murphy: "What is one thing I would change next time? Not focusing on negative, but what I can improve upon. It's constructive."
YT Verbal to Visual
"Loud Inner Critic? Take These Two Steps."
https://youtube.com/watch?v=r9nRkUAkEnM
Feb 15
If you don't show them way to find a heaven within themselves, then population is on alcohol, kind of drug, they are trying to build their own little heaven. We come to place to grow food we need chemicals. To be peaceful, we need chemicals.
YT Sadhguru
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJT5SFIKNDo
Feb 15
When somebody experiences the whole universe as a part of himself, then we say he's a Yogi. Yoga is the science of aligning your geometry, your individual geometry with the cosmic geometry. What comes from within you must be the way you want it, isn't it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJT5SFIKNDo
Feb 16
The fragility of the glass is not a weakness but a resource.
Into the Wild (2007)
Feb 16
If we admit that the human life is governed by the reason, the possibility of the life would be destroyed.
Into the Wild (2007)
Feb 16
My parents understood that a fine crystal glass had to be cared for or it may be shattered. Their course of secret action brought the kind of devastation that your cut them.
Into the Wild (2007)
Feb 16
People softened by the forced reflection that comes with loss.
Into the Wild (2007)
Feb 16
Stop trying to see big picture, focus on what's one step forward that you can take? And step by step you will find your way.
Mel Robbins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cra99c-MBTw
Feb 16
They know they are horrible people. But if they can lie about it, they push that shame a little bit. The projection is part of that shame. If they make you feel it's you and not about them, it moves them farther away from shame.
YT The Tea on NPD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvVgjHRvHaM
Feb 16
It's for you to be able to bring that thing out. And to have adult conversation with them about a feeling that narcissists are running from. This is why they run from everything. It's because of the shame. Can't handle the shame.
YT The Tea on NPD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvVgjHRvHaM
Feb 16
Emotionally they're still 5 yo. They're not able to process it. So they had to build up all of these abuse tactics, a whole false self , mechanisms, because they run from shame. Put that in their face,it's gonna make them run, get angry, demons manifesting
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvVgjHRvHaM
Feb 16
This is what destroys core of narcissist – to force them to look in that mirror and turn on themselves. Go inside to that child & deal with shame. That child inside can't make them understand it was their fault. They can't look at themselves.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvVgjHRvHaM
Feb 16
Did they wait until it was too late to make from their lives even one iota of what they were capable?
Because, you see, gentlemen, these boys are now fertilizing daffodils.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way.
You see, the world looks very different from up here. Come see for yourselves. Come on.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
Just when you think you know something, you have to look at it in another way.
Even though it may seem silly or wrong, you must try. Don't just consider what author thinks. Consider what you think.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
Boys, you must strive to find your own voice. Because the longer you wait to begin, the less likely you are to find it at all. "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation."
Don't be resigned to that. Break out.
Dare to strike out and find new ground.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
I've gotta stand tall
You know a man can't crawl
But when he knows you’re tellin’ lies
And he hears them passing’ by
He's not a man at all
The Everly Brothers - Cathy's Clown (1960)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyeryRobP2g
Feb 16
Robert Frost said, "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less travelled by, and that has made all the difference." Now, I want you to find your own walk right now. Your own way of striding, pacing. Any direction, anything you want. Whether proud, silly, anything.
Feb 16
Whether it's proud, whether it's silly, anything. You don't have to perform, just make it for yourself. Swim against the stream.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
Mr. Cameron, you could see him thinking, "Is this right? It might be right. I know that... Maybe not. I don't know."
I brought them up here to illustrate the point of conformity. The difficulty in maintaining your own beliefs in the face of others.
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 16
Now, we all have a great need for acceptance. But you must trust that your beliefs are unique, your own. Even though others may think them odd or unpopular.
Even though the herd may go, "That's baa-d."
Dead Poets Society (1989)
Feb 17
Guilt when setting boundaries was created when we tried to set our authentic self as child. And we were ashamed. So if we pursue us, we're bad. That created internal rule inside: “I can't be me, I'm defective”.
YT Feeling Guilty After Setting Boundaries?
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/cObVaa0SKEA
Feb 17
Toxic shame is underline sense or feeling of being worthless because of abandonment. And it's placed into us by our caregivers. Internalized. Instead of being episodic event where we have moment of it, it is now state of being.
YT Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
Parents inadvertently communicate to us in a way that creates this toxic shame. The way they do that is they can't communicate the difference between doing something imperfect and being imperfect.
YT Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
So children end up being confused. We grow up thinking that if we made a mistake we as a person are a mistake – and this is what creates the false self. We become doers and not be-ers. There is mistake doing imperfect and being imperfect.
YT Toxic Shame
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
They make us being the problem instead of the action the problem, we become the problem. And that gives the birth to all grinder philosophy, go, gotta go do, compulsion and obsession 'you have no worth unless you accomplish something'.
YT Toxic Shame
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
That's a lot of what shame is. The complete absence of care. Complete neglect. Self becomes an object of its own contempt. An object that can't be trusted. Must create false self to cover up, hide sense of being flawed. Do not know who you really are.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
I don't have the power to make you feel anything. If you have negative reaction to what I say, you are creating that within yourself.
YT How Toxic Shame Creates The False Self
Kenny Weiss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak_1rfWVE04
Feb 18
How do you know it's there? Acting in unpleasant manner. If you are pleasant it is you, if you are unpleasant it is you. Are you pleasant now? You just stay like this, that's all. It doesn't take anything to be pleasant.
YT Sadhguru
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YexZL-bRkG0
Feb 18
Keep in mind there are people out there who also have these “defects” and flaws who are able to be confident. It is not flaw itself, it is toxic shame which makes you focus on the flaw which makes further confidence lower and lower.
YT Sean Cooper
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6Dr70hqJKo
Feb 18
People who have toxic shame often have secret. If someone find out these secrets, you would instantly become social outcast. In reality it is impossible to fit in social norm what is acceptable. It is not unique as you might think.
YT Constantly Ashamed?
https://youtu.be/L6Dr70hqJKo
Feb 19
Nobody is superior, nobody is inferior, but nobody is equal either. People are simply unique, incomparable. You are you, I am I.
Osho
Feb 19
Narcissists are convinced that 'self awareness' means being aware of own mistakes and 'aware' of parts of self that are "wrong". This leads to chronic worry. There are millions of things that are wrong. Perhaps billion. We are not intended to be gods.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2022/01/navigating-through-social-anxiety.html
Feb 19
We can prune only parts of ourselves that will not cause organism to wither. Being focused on positive and good, by maintaining it and building it up, not by destroying it through pathologizing ourselves.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2022/01/navigating-through-social-anxiety.html
Feb 19
In olden days a glimpse of stocking
Was looked on as something shocking
But now God knows
Anything goes
The Four Lads - Anything Goes (1960)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7JLiASr3SQ
Feb 19
We don't want a trial by rumor.
Court TV
Feb 19
Withholding judgement until evidence comes in.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds, National Geographic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUQaynv7X9Y
Feb 19
Traveling to another dimension provides as an incidental benefit a kind of X-ray vision.
YT Magic Without Lies | Cosmos: Possible Worlds
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUQaynv7X9Y
Feb 19
Europa Report (2013)
Feb 20
We have green areas, but we have brown patches where we need to improve. To develop skill, break habit: Area that we want to grow. If we gonna see changes we need to plant seeds. Continue to throw seed every day.
Victoria Osteen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktbkJqtg3ak
Feb 20
He says something you don't like. The birds of offense come to eat your seed. But can I encourage you to focus on seed? Can I encourage you to put more effort in your seed than you do in the birds? It doesn't matter, continue to throw seed.
Victoria Osteen
https://youtu.be/ktbkJqtg3ak
Feb 20
It doesn't matter,we continue to throw that seed out. That seed will grow in. Don't look at the birds, look at the seeds. The seeds that you are sowing will outlast any birds, any trials, any difficulties that you face. No birds, talk about seed.
V. Osteen
https://youtu.be/ktbkJqtg3ak
Feb 20
Even if you expect your plan to work out, have provision, spare tire. How? Make decision no matter comes against you you'll not take offense&be sour; made up your mind to stay in peace. When someone's rude to you-no big deal, put my spare tire and move on.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
And the people in your life, as good as they are, there are no perfect people. There is no perfect boss, no perfect friend, no perfect neighbor, no perfect spouse. Give people room to be human. Quit expecting them to perform perfectly all the time
J.OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
“Well, they hurt my feelings”. If you have a spare tire, you forgive them and move on. Don't have unrealistic expectations. No matter how good they are, at times they will disappoint you. They going to say things that they shouldn't.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
Don't be easily offended. You don't know what is going on in their lives. Don't take it personally. Here is the key; your happiness is not someone else's responsibility. You are responsible for your own happiness.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://youtu.be/I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
Too often we're counting on other people to keep us cheered up, encouraged, feeling good about ourselves. That's putting too much pressure on the people in your lives. Let them off the hook. Are you without spare tire; Only happy when things go your way?
https://youtu.be/I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
Life is too short to live offended, upset, discouraged. We are not always going to be here. Put foot down “I am not going to let these same things keep upsetting me. I am going to stay in peace even when unfair”.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
You can control what you do. If you let them upset you, you are giving them your power, you let them to control you. New approach: decide ahead of time that you're going to stay in peace and you'll tap in to that power to remain calm.
JOEL OSTEEN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2rRzw6PAZY
Feb 20
Cognitive fusion is inability to doubt - either myself of others, my thought or opinion of others.
https://77ranko.blogspot.com/2022/01/navigating-through-social-anxiety.html
Feb 21
We will be very sneaky in trying to find out the certainty of situation. Accept that it is uncertain. I don't know. Learn to live with that uncertainty.
YT How to Recognize Sneaky or Tricky OCD Compulsions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YJ9cXuBl2s
Feb 21
Escape attempt from pain creates more pain.
We get addicted to it.
Dr. Gabor Maté
Feb 21
As long as we see abusers as victims, or as out-of-control monsters, they will continue getting away with ruining lives. If we want abusers to change, we will have to require them to give up the luxury of exploitation.
LUNDY BANCROFT
Feb 22
Maxwell Montes is the Tallest Mountain On Venus (11 km elevation).
It is the "coldest" place on Venus with 380 °C.
YT Dreksler Astral
https://youtube.com/watch?v=EMZx1QVzS0I
Feb 22
Moon Landing Apollo 11 Press Conference:
"I don't recall what stars we could see"
"I don't remember seeing any"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_fV4I5q4PJk
Feb 22
22022022 is a good day to start something new.
I've created reddit community for Social Anxiety, CPTSD and Avoidance - ideas, philosophy, background data to shine a light on our rejected, ashamed and invisible parts:
https://www.reddit.com/r/SocialAnxiety_Ideas/
Feb 22
Still Stream
Pure Ambient Net Radio
Feb 23
All you need is just the right amount of polarity, as long as you have some, the person will respect you more, find you more authentic, and they're going to be more attracted to you.
YT Why A Polarizing Personality Makes You More Attractive
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
Ironically by trying to be liked by everyone and hated by none, you're most likely to end up completely alone.
YT Michael Knight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
If person can get you worked up and argumentative so easily, that is not very attractive. It shows that you're really reactive person and you're not really well grounded and secure with your beliefs.
YT Michael Knight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
If you are really secure with your beliefs, you really know who you are and you know what you believe and you're not apologetic about it, then other people will not be able to shake you so easily. You're not going to get into arguments, or defend your view – you believe it.
Feb 23
It's only people who are very insecure with the worldview and they feel like they need everyone else to agree with them, to feel comfortable, they're the ones that are going to be argumentative.
YT Michael Knight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
In most bases you can be disagreeable as well as polite. Being disagreeable is not being rude. Too many people play not to lose instead of playing to win. They hold back in conversations, out of fear of saying wrong thing, don't express themselves honestly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
By not taking those chances, by not appearing authentic, they end up losing people anyway. Way more often, more attraction will be created through a willingness to be a little bit disagreeable than will be lost through having difference of opinion.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
You don't have to actively trying to be disagreeable or fake disagreeability or manufacture conflict. You come off as unauthentic and dishonest. Simply remove your filters. Speak honestly. Not be afraid to say something another person may disagree with.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
When in doubt, just say it. You're going to become more polarizing but in a natural way or other people start trusting what you say more, respecting you and finding you more attractive. Being self-secure in and displaying one's words, are attractive traits
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMElUAxL6CY
Feb 23
There are clear sign someone is healing: they are getting along better with people, feel more at ease in groups. When alone their talents and gifts start to emerging, filling up their life with purpose and hopefulness.
YT Crappy Childhood Fairy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VxNuuq8AWw
Feb 23
Our immune system does not exist in isolation from daily experience. Loneliness has been similarly associated with diminished immune activity.
Many people unwittingly spend their entire lives as if under the gaze of a powerful and judgmental examiner whom they must please at all
Feb 23
That's alright, is it? To not have a moments rest, to suffer. To grow old, ugly. That is moral? Know what I say? You only live once. And then you die. So you can go to hell you and your morals.
Woman of Rome/La Romana (1954)
Feb 23
Many of us live, if not alone, then in emotionally inadequate relationships that do not recognize or honour our deepest needs.
Isolation and stress affect many who may believe their lives are quite satisfactory.
"When the Body Says No", Dr. Gabor Maté
Feb 24
Instead of beating yourself down, give yourself permission to have this desire, and use your energy to figure out how to make it happen on your own terms is how you use your own insecurity.
Mel Robbins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOFrrpOU1MM
Feb 24
Conflict will happen and has to be addressed. Narcissists are so committed to their false self. Healthiest way of managing your anger is assertiveness. Stay legitimately in your needs and convictions, that is valid, you convey to be respected.
YT Surviving
Feb 24
Clean exchange of thoughts, feelings and information. Narcissists live so much in false self when you say something needs to change,adjustments to make,they become ridiculously thin skin. They're afraid of being wrong, driven by fears. They see competition
Feb 24
Narcissists are very wounded and broken individuals. Some are beyond redemption. They want to give you message your feelings are not valid, you are not valid. Assertiveness by definition is what you think, feel, your parameters make sense.
YT Surviving N.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyt7KjZ13S4
Feb 24
It does mean to cease your efforts to force feed narcissists to see the light. Some people don't want to know. It doesn't mean to stop any consequences; withdraw, move on with someone else, continue to know what is wisest and best, stay with my initiates.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyt7KjZ13S4
Feb 24
Is this somebody I need to continue to have any interaction at all? Stay true to who you are. Understand you're dealing with somebody who is dysregulated. Don't cease holding firmly to what you know is wisest and best. You don't need their approval. Be you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyt7KjZ13S4
Feb 24
I don't understand why people don't talk to a psychiatrist without having mental issues. They prefer listening to a guru marketing guy, a millionaire, billionaire but not talk to psychiatrist, which first is doctor-study tissue with microscope
YT Dayenoff
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvoCW-jBYjk
Feb 24
Let's really put things in perspective. Emergency = fake drama created by toxic person to get our attention. If you're not present with loved ones, if you're not savoring time with loved ones, that's not going to be coming back. This is the real cost.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIgG64c8h8s
Feb 24
You're like a horse or dog, or a man or any other woman... Once I understand you, you're alright.
Ramrod (1947)
Feb 24
Being opinionated is fine, knowing who you are, standards is beginning point on having good relationship boundaries. So having strong ideas correct vs incorrect is not a bad thing. Stubbornly Opinionated is domineering, closed minded.
Surviving Narcissism
https://youtu.be/JJ2408epIQY
Feb 24
There's agitation. They're not just committed to opinion, they're committed to their anger. They don't care about empathy. Why should I bother to learn about you,effort to learn your perception. Presume they should be in control. Fit other people in groves
Feb 24
They don't trust people, they need to tell other people what to think. They will say they are not problem. Hidden victimization: If I allow your ideas you will make my life miserable. Diversity many times is quite good.
YT Stubbornly Opinionated
https://youtu.be/JJ2408epIQY
Feb 24
You can remain resolute and firm while also accepting those who differ and sometimes accommodating those who differ.
YT Why Are Narcissists So Stubbornly Opinionated?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJ2408epIQY
Feb 24
Self-regulation, writes Ross Buck, “involves in part the attainment of emotional competence, which is defined as the ability to deal in an appropriate and satisfactory way with one’s own feelings and desires.”
Dr. Gabor Maté,
"When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress"
Feb 25
Forging your own path and not listening to everyone else.
Do you really want to listen to person who just regurgitating whatever they heard on tv? Person who does same thing over and over and never getting different results?
YT Michael Knight
Feb 25
Do what you want but I'm going to follow my intuition because I'm grounded and I believe in myself, in process and believe if I apply knowledge that I learned I'm going to get where I want to go even if no one else is on path with me.
YT Becoming GROUNDED
Feb 25
Grounded person does not change their values and beliefs based on who is around them. Bring you into conformity because that makes them feel good about themselves. Even if that happens, they will lose respect for you.
YT Becoming GROUNDED
Michael Knight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXkmPwKh-D4
Feb 25
His indifference shows his moods & emotions aren't dependent on outcome of interaction. Thus he puts no pressure on the other person. Not trying to impress. Needy person would be horrified to do anything embarrassing in front of them
YT Why Women LOVE Chad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QwTk05ffO8
Feb 25
- Why you fish your hand for? You could pull your it away.
- I didn't know what he would do. I didn't want to make him mad.
The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)
Feb 25
The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming
(1966)
Line from the movie:
"Don't you realize you'll start war? You can't do that! Have you got crazy?"
Feb 25
For anger to be deployed appropriately, the organism has to distinguish between threat and non-threat.
If I don’t know where my own boundaries begin and end, I cannot know when something potentially dangerous is intruding on them.
"When the Body Says No", Dr. Gabor Maté
Feb 26
CNN live feed from Kyiv 24/7 at
Astra 4A at 4.8°E
12611 H 4609
Feb 27
"I have to be strong"
The core belief in having to be strong enough, characteristic of many people who develop chronic illness, is a defense.
When the Body Says No - The Cost of Hidden Stress
Book by Gabor Maté
Feb 27
Liberation from oppressive and stressful external circumstances is essential, but that is only possible if we first liberate ourselves from the tyranny of our ingrained biology of belief:
If I’m angry, I will not be lovable
I must justify my existence
When the Body Says No,G.Maté
Feb 27
Nobody loves no one.
Wicked Game · Midland
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ocjj2IwbVeY
Feb 27
Trauma does not reside in the external event but in our becoming stuck in our primitive responses to painful events.
Trauma is not what happens to us, but what we hold inside. The salvation, then, is to be found in the body.
"In an Unspoken Voice", Peter Levine
Feb 28
You lost the connection to yourself. That's trauma. There is external event, impact. Had not that resulted in disconnecting with yourself, you would not be traumatized.
H. A. Almaas, Diamond Approach
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHSYGM5uzt4
Feb 28
Trauma is the great masquerader and participant in many maladies and "dis-eases" that afflict sufferers. It can perhaps be conjectured that unresolved trauma is responsible for a majority of the illnesses of modern mankind.
Peter Levine
Feb 28
True human enlightenment will only happen when each and every single person on the planet has learned how to regulate their very own nervous system.
PETER LEVINE
Feb 28
Sudden snow.
